


Keep It Together

by enigmaticblue



Series: If All Else Fails [3]
Category: Stargate Atlantis, Stargate SG-1
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-03-22
Updated: 2012-03-29
Packaged: 2017-11-02 08:32:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 12
Words: 72,851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/367021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/enigmaticblue/pseuds/enigmaticblue
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As Atlantis begins to solidify its position in the Pegasus Galaxy, it’s threatened by enemies old and new. The addition of new SGC personnel threatens to destabilize the fragile balance on the city, and Atlantis must face the question of what to do about Earth.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Title from the Guster song by the same name. This story is complete. I will be posting a chapter every other day until they're all up.

_“Once Teal’c and company rescued me, the priority became finding some way to get to Atlantis. We all knew how tough it would be for the SGC teams to get there, and we’d stashed a few naquadah generators just in case, but every team had orders to avoid those stashes if possible in order to avoid giving away the locations. We didn’t know how much the Goa’uld knew about Atlantis, but we figured it was plenty. So, we took a ship because we had one available, and we didn’t want to risk walking into a trap. It seemed like the best option we had, even though it took a little longer to get where we were going.”_

 

~Interview with Jack O’Neill

 

Jack stood outside the small hut they’d been using for his recovery, looking up at the planet shadowing the horizon. The moon they were staying on was temperate, even pleasant, and it didn’t have a gate, so they didn’t have to worry about someone showing up unannounced. Bra’tac had insisted that this place was safe, that very few people knew about it, and that Jack could recover in peace.

 

Bra’tac hadn’t been able to stay, but he’d dropped them off with a promise to be back in a month, when Jack had recovered.

 

Cassie appeared at his side, snaking an arm around his waist. “Hey.”

 

“Hey, kiddo,” Jack said, draping his arm across her shoulders.

 

“You should be in bed,” she insisted. “You’re not going to recover if you don’t rest.”

 

“I’m fine,” he insisted. “Where’s the clone?”

 

“You could call him by his name, you know,” Cassie said with some asperity.

 

Jack sighed. “Fine. Where’s Jon?”

 

“He went hunting with Teal’c.”

 

“I wish I could go hunting,” Jack said, chafing at the inactivity.

 

Cassie sighed. “I know this sucks, Jack, but—seriously, deal with it.”

 

“Suck it up, buttercup?” he suggested.

 

Cassie grinned. “Yeah, something like that.”

 

“I hate not being able to do anything,” he confessed.

 

“You and me both,” Cassie muttered. “I hate not knowing what’s going on back on Earth.”

 

Jack could guess. He was fairly certain that Ba’al was behind this mess; he was just devious enough to fuck with all of them. From what Jack had witnessed, anybody who wasn’t implanted with a snake was either dead or on a most-wanted list.

 

“He’s going to work it so that he’s in control of the important people,” Jack said quietly. “The people he can’t control, he’ll either kill or move into positions where they can’t do much.”

  
Cassie pulled away. “Do you know who’s in control of all of this?”

 

“I have my suspicions,” Jack admitted. “But I don’t have proof.”

 

“Who do you suspect?” Cassie demanded. “I want to know.”

 

“I think it’s Ba’al,” Jack admitted. “He’s a crafty bastard, and I think he’s working behind the scenes to get what he wants.”

 

“What does he want?” Cassie asked.

 

“Earth under his control,” Jack mused. “He’s probably going to use the Ori as an external threat to unify Earth.”

 

Cassie made a face. “Okay, that sucks, especially because it will probably work.”

 

“It usually does,” Jack admitted. “Unfortunately, the people most likely to stop him are either compromised, in hiding, or off-world.”

 

Cassie swallowed. “Like us.”

 

“Like us,” Jack confirmed.

 

Cassie tipped her head back to look at the planet that hung above them. “It’s hard to believe that I was in class a couple of weeks ago, taking notes on the Roman empire.”

 

Jack sighed. He hated the fact that Cassie _wasn’t_ in class right now.

 

“And don’t start,” Cassie insisted. “I chose to come, Jack. I’d much rather be here.”

 

“Your mom would have been so pissed off about this,” Jack murmured. “She hated it when people abused their power.” Jack took a deep breath. “She would have wanted you to finish college.”

 

“Not if I was going to be doing it in a police state,” Cassie shot back. “Like I told Teal’c, I felt like someone was following me before he showed up. Maybe they would have left me alone, but maybe not.”

 

“I’d rather be safe than sorry,” Jack said quietly.

 

“Exactly,” Cassie said. “Besides, who says I can’t be a doctor?” she asked. “There are doctors on Atlantis, right? Maybe it just means I serve as an apprentice and learn everything I can that way.”

 

“You shouldn’t give up on school just yet,” Jack insisted. “You can still go back.”

 

Cassie laughed, but there was a little bitterness in the sound. “Come on, Jack. Get real. Even if we retake Earth, it’s not going to happen tomorrow. There’s no telling when I’ll be able to go back to school, if ever. I’m making contingency plans.”

 

“It’s always good to have a backup plan,” Jack acknowledged. “I just didn’t want you to have to use it.”

 

Cassie sighed. “Without my family, Earth is just another planet. I’m not _from_ there, and pretending otherwise is really hard when I’m alone.”

 

“Pretending anything is hard over the long term,” Jack agreed.

 

“As long as you guys were around, I knew there were people who knew who I was, and where I came from,” Cassie said. “I’d rather be with you than trying to live some sort of fake life on Earth.”

 

Jack knew he’d feel the same in her shoes, and he couldn’t argue with her. “Fair enough.”

 

“How are we going to get to Atlantis?” Cassie asked.

 

“I’m hoping we can convince Bra’tac to lend us a ship,” Jack admitted. “There are a few naquadah generators hidden around the Milky Way, but the rule is that SGC personnel are to avoid those planets if they can to avoid giving us away.”

 

“If we can’t get a ship, then we find a generator,” Cassie said. “It’s a plan.”

 

Jack smiled. “It’s some kind of plan.”

 

“Hey, guys!” Jon called. He was carrying a couple of plump birds by the feet, and Teal’c had a couple of rabbit-type creatures. “Look like we’ve got dinner.”

 

Jack sighed.

 

“Be nice,” Cassie warned him in an undertone. “He did help save your life.”

 

“I like being the _only_ Jack O’Neill,” he grumbled, but he knew Cassie was right, and he knew that Jon was a different person now. He wasn’t Jack at age eighteen—he’d become someone else entirely.

 

And right now, they’re stuck together. “Good job,” Jack managed. “I’m starving.”

 

Jon handed the birds to Cassie and took Teal’c’s burden. “We’ll get started on these,” he said, leading the way inside the small, cramped hut.

 

Jack met Teal’c’s eyes. “How did it go?”

 

“Quite well, O’Neill,” Teal’c replied. “You seem to be feeling better.”

 

Jack hitched the shoulder that didn’t hurt quite so much. “Yeah, I’m better. I’ll be fine.”

 

“I had no doubt,” Teal’c replied solemnly.

 

“Do you think we’ll be able to find a ship?” Jack asked.

 

“Bra’tac knows what you require,” Teal’c said. “If he can find a ship, you will have one.”

 

“And if we can’t, we’ll give him the generator after we use it to dial in to Atlantis,” Jack said, although he suspected that they’d get a ship. Bra’tac was nothing if not resourceful.

 

Teal’c put a gentle hand on Jack’s shoulder. “You should rest.”

 

Jack hated his current weakness, but he knew Teal’c was right. He was beginning to think that he might not bounce back from this. Jack had accepted a desk job for a reason, and now it looked like he’d be back in the middle of the fray.

 

Jack only hoped he was up for the challenge.


	2. Balance

_“As happy as we were to have SGC personnel arrive on Atlantis, it caused some problems. McKay offloaded the soft sciences onto Daniel Jackson, and was happy to do it, but Carter had been in a command position in the SGC. It was a toss-up as to who was more qualified to be CSO of Atlantis, but Rodney had the position by virtue of our charter. And Mitchell—he had a tough recovery. It took us a while to strike a balance.”_

 

~Interview with John Sheppard

 

Elizabeth sighed and rubbed her eyes. “What do you think it means that we haven’t gotten more SGC personnel?”

 

John shrugged. “Maybe they’re having a hard time reaching Pegasus. It could be they’ve run up against interference, or maybe they’re lying low. Hard to say.”

 

“Which leads me to the next question,” Elizabeth said. “What are we going to _do_ with the personnel who arrive?”

 

John leaned back in his chair. “Are we talking about Lieutenant Colonel Carter?”

 

“And Colonel Mitchell,” she added.

 

“We all need a break,” John pointed out. “No one gets days off, and if something goes wrong, they always call you, me, or McKay, even when we’re supposed to be off-duty. So, why don’t we start working in shifts? The three of us would still have the ultimate authority, but we could all use relief pitchers, if you don’t mind the sports metaphor.”

 

Elizabeth nodded. “I agree. Colonel Carter for McKay, I suppose, but who would you suggest stand in for me, or for you?”

 

“Mitchell for you,” John replied. “Look, he’s going to have a long recovery, and he may never be capable of going out into the field again. But he’s a trained officer, and he’s been groomed for a command position. I know the type. He’s a natural leader, and he’ll command respect from the people on this base, just by virtue of being in charge of SG-1, and going through what he did.”

 

“And you?” Elizabeth asked.

 

“Lorne,” John said immediately. “He’s my second in command, Elizabeth. He needs the experience, and it’s about time he’s accorded the respect. If something happens to me, I want to know that he can step into my shoes without so much as a ripple.” Almost as an afterthought, he added, “Plus, I trust him.”

 

That was high praise indeed, and Elizabeth nodded. “What about Zelenka?”

 

“He’s an engineer,” John replied. “And his skill set is different. Maybe it’s time to divide up those responsibilities into sub-groups. We’re going to need to clear more of the city for human habitation anyway.”

 

Elizabeth nodded. “You make a good point.”

 

 John buffed his nails against the front of his uniform. “I usually do.”

 

She laughed. “All right. Who’s going to break the news to Rodney?”

 

“We’ve already talked about it,” John replied offhandedly. “He’s on board. He also suggested we put them on a gate team, and use them as an additional first contact team.”

 

Elizabeth nodded. “That’s a good idea. We could use another one.”

 

“That’s what I thought.”

 

“So, do you want to break the news to Sam and Mitchell together, or would you prefer I approach them?”

 

“I’ll let you take Carter, and I’ll take Mitchell,” John said.

 

Elizabeth knew that John had been visiting Mitchell a few times every week, and they’d built up a rapport. “Are you going to be the one to tell him he’s not going back into the field?”

 

John shook his head. “Hey, I never said that, and I’m not going to tell him that now.” He grinned. “Besides, sometimes _you_ go into the field.”

 

“And I’m sure you’re going to bring that up,” Elizabeth responded, amused.

 

John shrugged. “Whatever works. Besides, from what I understand, nobody thought Mitchell would walk again after he crashed in Antarctica, and he ended up leading SG-1.”

 

“Fair point.” Elizabeth stiffened as the gate alarm went off. “Do we have a team expected back?”

 

John glanced at the clock on her desk. “No. The next team isn’t due back for another two hours.”

 

They were out of their seats and moving as one a second later. Chuck was already talking when they hit the control platform. “The dial-in is from within Pegasus, Dr. Weir,” he said. “No IDC yet.”

 

Elizabeth crossed her arms tightly over her chest. “Wait for it, Chuck.”

 

“Yes, ma’am.” After a long, tense pause, Chuck said, “It’s Dr. Caroline Lam’s IDC.”

 

Elizabeth glanced over at John, seeing the incredulous joy that she felt reflected on his face. “Radio contact.”

 

“Yes, ma’am,” Chuck replied, his clever fingers flying over the keyboard. “Go ahead.”

 

“This is Dr. Weir of the Atlantis colony,” Elizabeth said. “To whom am I speaking?”

 

“This is Dr. Caroline Lam,” came the reply.

 

“Dr. Lam, it’s great to hear your voice,” Elizabeth replied. “How are you?”

 

“We’re a little the worse for wear, but otherwise okay,” she said. “Can we come through?”

 

Elizabeth glanced at John, who shook his head. “We’re going to give you the address to our alpha site,” she replied. “We’ll have a team meet you there. I’m sure you understand our precautions.”

 

“Completely understood,” Lam replied. “Can I ask if anyone else from the SGC has made it?”

 

“SG-1 arrived about 10 days ago,” Elizabeth said. “You can see them as soon as we clear you.”

 

“Thank you, Dr. Weir. We’re waiting for the address.”

 

“Chuck, send it,” Elizabeth ordered, and glanced over at John. “Speak of the devil,” she murmured. “Dr. Lam was chief medical officer at the SGC.”

 

John smiled. “I guess Carson could probably use the relief just as much as we can, huh?”

 

“Do you want to do the honors?”

 

“I’ll call Carter, Jackson and Vala,” John replied. “They might want to be there.”

 

Elizabeth nodded. “Do it.”

 

“I’ll keep you updated,” John promised.

 

“Good luck, John,” she called.

 

Elizabeth stayed on the control platform, breathing a sigh of relief as Dr. Lam confirmed reception of the alpha site address. “Colonel Sheppard is going to meet you there and escort you to Atlantis once you’ve been cleared,” Elizabeth assured her. “We’ll get you to safety as soon as we can.”

 

“Thank you, Dr. Weir,” Lam replied. “We’ll see you soon.”

 

“Absolutely,” she replied, thinking that at least this time around they weren’t rushing to save someone’s life, fearing that they would be too late.

 

And she didn’t know what was worse—arriving just a little too late to help, or knowing that there was nothing they could have done differently to prevent a tragedy. In Cameron Mitchell’s case, he’d been all but lost the moment he’d been stung, because the venom had been that potent.

 

They weren’t operating under the same deadline they’d faced with SG-1, but John had insisted that they improve their response time. The work had paid off, because less than fifteen minutes later, he was standing in front of the gate with Ronon and Teyla flanking him. Sam, Daniel, and Vala fell in step just behind them, which resulted in an impressive welcoming committee. “Good luck!” she called.

 

John raised his hand in acknowledgment. “We’ll stay in touch,” he called out.

 

Elizabeth was a little surprised that Rodney wasn’t with them, but maybe it made sense, considering that Rodney didn’t know Lam, and Elizabeth had discouraged Rodney and John from leaving the city at the same time.

 

When the gate had closed behind them, Elizabeth heaved a sigh. This was the second team from the SGC to dial in, and Elizabeth knew there was likely to be more. She _hoped_ there would be more, but she wasn’t sure what that would mean for her place on Atlantis.  If O’Neill appeared, Elizabeth knew she’d probably have to defend her position vigorously, even if O’Neill didn’t want the job.

 

It was a hell of a situation to be in, Elizabeth thought. She wanted O’Neill to make it out because she admired him on a personal and professional level, but she thought it might be easier if he never made it to Atlantis.

 

And that sucked, as John might say.

 

Elizabeth took a deep breath and reminded herself that no matter what happened in the end, it would be a very good thing if O’Neill could escape the clutches of the Trust. And the more SGC personnel who escaped—who made it off-world and made their way to Atlantis—the better their chances of freeing Earth.

 

If that was even a possibility.

 

Elizabeth closed her eyes and took a breath. Right now, Earth didn’t matter. She couldn’t concentrate on anything but Atlantis, and the mission, and dealing with whatever problems came up in the meantime.

 

She found it impossible to go back to her office, to focus on the reports that waited for her, so she made sure her radio was on and walked the city. She felt as though she knew every inch of Atlantis, maybe not quite as well as John or Rodney or Radek, but almost as well.

 

If she couldn’t go back to Earth, Elizabeth would work on being happy here.

 

~~~~~

 

Evan caught the call over the radio that they had another SGC team coming in, and Sheppard was going to collect them at the alpha site. “I’m not asking you to come back to the city,” Dr. Weir assured him. “Just don’t linger too long on the mainland.”

 

“Yes, ma’am,” Evan replied easily. “I’ll be back as soon as I can.”

 

He wiped his sweaty palms on the legs of his BDUs one at a time, grateful that he could fly the jumper with his mind, as long as he didn’t get too distracted.

 

Captain Reeves glanced over at him from the co-pilot’s seat. “Anything we should be worried about?”

 

“There’s another SGC team that made contact. Dr. Weir is routing them to the alpha site, and Sheppard’s taking most of SG-1 to meet them there.” Evan smiled. “You don’t know what you’re missing, Reeves.”

 

“I think I’ll take a pass on it anyway, sir,” he said cheerfully. Then, lowering his voice, he added, “Besides, Anson needs the break.”

 

Evan winced, and asked in a low voice, “How’s he doing?”

 

“Losing Earth on top of everything else put him back a step,” Reeves admitted. “But everybody who comes back from the mainland looks—better. I know it’s not a vacation, that we’re going to work, but it seemed like a place where he could get his feet under him again.”

 

“It might be a working vacation, but it’s a different kind of work,” Evan replied. “Yeah, I think it will do your whole team good.”

 

Reeves had requested a longer rotation than two weeks, and Sheppard had granted the request. Anson was a chemical engineer with an additional degree in pharmacology. Technically, Reeves had gotten permission to stay longer so that Anson could research some of the traditional remedies that the Athosians used.

 

No one had bothered to point out that it would be just as easy to bring the traditional remedies to Atlantis to study. Everyone knew about the mission that had gone wrong a few months before, where Anson had watched a teammate tortured and killed in front of him.

 

Since that teammate had insisted on taking Anson’s place, Evan could understand why he was having a hard time dealing with it, and why Reeves would do everything in his power to make things easier for him. Reeves had his own guilt to bear.

 

Evan had volunteered to pilot the jumper bringing Reeves’ team to the mainland and collecting the additional Athosians who had volunteered to serve as guides—and Laro. After a two-week delay, Laro was coming to Atlantis.

 

That was the reason for the sweaty palms. Evan had no idea if their fledgling connection would survive the separation or continued contact.

 

Evan honestly wasn’t sure what he wanted to happen. He liked Laro a lot, and he was more attracted to Laro than he’d been to anyone in a very long time, but Evan had no idea how this relationship was supposed to work.

 

Normally, he’d view it as a casual connection, and he wouldn’t worry about it, but this felt different. Laro was different.

 

Or, at least, Evan _thought_ Laro might be different.

 

He set the jumper down in the field the Athosians had designated for that purpose and watched as the others disembarked.

 

Evan followed them off, looking around, spotting Laro approaching immediately. He was saved from having to decide whether to shake hands or embrace when Laro put his hands on Evan’s shoulders and initiated the Athosian form of greeting, touching his forehead to Evan’s in a gesture that was more intimate than a handshake but less awkward than a hug might have been.

 

Laro smelled of earth and the slightly spicy soap favored by the Athosians, and Evan felt the heat of his body, and the strength of his hands.

 

“I have missed you,” Laro breathed.

 

Evan smiled. “Me, too. I don’t have much time here.”

 

“I am ready, although I have to confess I have a great deal of baggage,” Laro replied. “I don’t know how long I’ll be on Atlantis, and I’m not willing to leave behind my wheel.”

 

“I figured,” Evan admitted. “We’ve got the room. I’ve already talked to one of our engineers, and he’s working on making a kiln you can use, although he said he’d wait to start until after you’d arrived and gave your approval.”

 

Laro smiled. “That would be ideal.”

 

Halling approached with a welcoming smile. “Major Lorne, it is good to see you again.”

 

“It’s good to see you, too, Halling,” Lorne replied. “Colonel Sheppard wanted me to be sure to thank you for the additional manpower.”

 

“It’s a fair exchange,” Halling said. “The assistance you have given us has allowed us to double our crop yield, and increase our ability to hunt.”

 

“Are the guides ready?” Evan asked. “I hate to run, but we’re expecting another team from Earth, and Dr. Weir asked me to hurry back.”

 

“Of course,” Halling replied. “All the guides should be prepared to leave. I’ll call in a few people to help load your ship, and Jinto will show your men to their tent.”

 

Jinto was all awkward limbs and eager eyes, although he tried to play it cool. Evan made the introductions of Reeves and his team, and watched as they followed Jinto to one of the tents set aside for Atlantis personnel.

 

Evan supposed he shouldn’t be too surprised that the pottery wheel could be packed up so easily. Broken down to its basic components, folded down and packed up tight, it took up no more room than the two boxes of clay Laro brought with him, and weighed considerably less.

 

He didn’t protest the clay, or the wheel, or the box of paints and glazes Laro brought. Every box was a promise of time that Laro meant to spend on Atlantis, time that they could use to figure out if this thing between them was going anywhere.

 

Evan waved Laro into the co-pilot’s chair. “Have you ever been up in one of these before?”

 

“No, never,” Laro replied. “I have only gone through the Ring of the Ancestors a handful of times.” Laro paused. “But you call it the ‘gate,’ yes?”

 

“Yeah, the Stargate,” Evan confirmed. “But gate for short. You can call it whatever you like.”

 

Laro shrugged. “I can call it the gate.” Lowering his voice, Laro added, “I do not retain the faith of my people.”

 

Evan wasn’t sure what to say to that, other than to offer a short nod. He couldn’t disparage the Athosians’ faith, but neither could he offer affirmation. His parents had been Presbyterian, and his sister had converted to Catholicism when she got married.

 

All Evan could say was, “We should see if the gene therapy takes for you. It hasn’t for a lot of people from Pegasus, but you never know.”

 

Laro grinned. “If I could fly a ship like this…” He touched the control panel in front of him reverently. “That would be amazing.”

 

“I think Dr. Weir is going to offer the gene therapy to anyone who agrees to help us out,” Evan said. “And that includes you.”

 

“That is good to hear,” Laro replied. “I did not tell Halling when I would be back, Evan.”

 

“Then I guess we’ll just have to play it by ear,” Evan replied with a smile.

 

~~~~~

 

Teyla followed John through the gate to the designated alpha site where Elizabeth had routed the team from Earth. She wasn’t sure what to expect after the last mission, where they’d found Colonel Mitchell on the brink of death. This time, thank the Ancestors, the situation was nowhere near so dire.

 

In fact, as soon as they walked through the gate, Sergeant Robbins met them at the gate, sketching a quick salute. “Sir, Dr. Lam and company arrived about ten minutes ago.”

 

“How are they, Sarge?” John asked.

 

“In relatively good shape,” she replied. “Looking forward to getting to Atlantis, sir.”

 

“I know this isn’t a plum assignment, but I appreciate your good work, Robbins,” John said with a smile.

 

Robbins straightened, her chin up and a smile playing around her lips. “Yes, sir.”

 

Their arrival hadn’t gone unnoticed by the newcomers. “Sam!” a woman’s voice called.

 

“Carrie!” Colonel Carter started forward, only to be held back by John’s outstretched arm.

 

“Sorry, Colonel,” John said, a real apology in his voice. “We need to scan them first.” He handed the second scanner to Dr. Jackson. “We’ll get it done as quick as we can, and get them back to Atlantis for a check by Dr. Beckett, a hot meal, and a debriefing.”

 

Colonel Carter grimaced. “Got it.”

 

“I’m sorry,” John said quietly, sincerely. “It’s just SOP.” He strode towards the small knot of people. The soldiers from Atlantis were grouped around them, clearly on guard, but with weapons still in their holsters. “I’m Lieutenant Colonel John Sheppard,” John called. “If you’ll bear with us, we’re going to scan you for Goa’ulds and escort you to Atlantis.”

 

“Of course, Colonel.” The woman who had called out to Colonel Carter spoke for the entire group. “I’m Dr. Caroline Lam.” She went around the circle, introducing all of them quickly. “Captain Briggs, Lieutenant Arnold, Master Sergeant Coleman, Staff Sergeant Williams, and Corporal Jones.”

 

“Nice to meet all of you,” John replied. “This scan is quick and painless, and it won’t take more than a few minutes.”

 

Dr. Lam cleared her throat. “What about the rest of the team?” she asked as Dr. Jackson approached her with the scanner. “Where are Teal’c and Cam?”

 

“Teal’c stayed in the Milky Way galaxy,” Colonel Carter replied. “He was going back after Jack. Cam is on Atlantis. He was hurt pretty badly just before we arrived, and he’s not cleared for gate travel yet.”

 

Dr. Lam’s eyes widened. “How bad?”

 

If Teyla read the signs correctly, there had been something more between Dr. Lam and Colonel Mitchell than simple friendship—or perhaps it was the possibility of something more that had been unresolved. Teyla knew all about that kind of regret.

 

“He’s going to be okay,” Colonel Carter replied. “You can see for yourself when you get back on Atlantis.”

 

John and Dr. Jackson had made it through half of the group by now, and Teyla kept a sharp eye on them. If one of them were a Goa’uld, it would respond badly to possible discovery, as Colonel Caldwell had.

 

No one made a move, though.

 

“Do you know anything about General O’Neill?” Colonel Carter asked, sounding a little desperate.

 

Dr. Lam shook her head. “No, I’m sorry. He sent us through the gate, and said he was going to evade capture for as long as he could.”

 

Colonel Carter took a deep breath. “Okay. Teal’c was going after him. Maybe—you know Teal’c.”

 

“I wouldn’t bet against him,” Dr. Lam replied.

 

“Okay, you’re all clear,” John announced. “Let’s get back to Atlantis and let you all take a load off.”

 

John herded them back to the gate like recalcitrant children. Teyla had noticed that he’d been more careful of his people lately, more cautious with them. Although John would not appreciate the comparison, Teyla thought it obvious that he’d taken the weight of the expedition on his shoulders even more than before.

 

Carson met them in the gate room with a medical team, and they quickly ushered Dr. Lam and the others to the infirmary. Dr. Carter, Dr. Jackson, and Vala headed in the same direction, while Teyla followed John up to Elizabeth’s office, with Ronon close at her heels.

 

John plopped down in one of the chairs across from Elizabeth’s desk. “They’re clean. I sent them to the infirmary to get checked out. I think we should save the debrief for tomorrow morning, though.”

 

“I agree,” Elizabeth replied. “We’ll schedule a meeting for 10 am tomorrow. That should give everyone time to settle in.”

 

“We’ll let Dr. Lam and her crew know,” John promised. “They seem to be in pretty good shape, but I’ll let Carson be the final say there. Have you notified Stackhouse that we’ll need more quarters set up?”

 

“Not yet,” Elizabeth admitted.

 

“I’ll take care of it,” John promised. “Has Lorne checked in?”

 

“He’s on his way back to the city,” Elizabeth replied. “Along with Laro and five Athosian guides.”

 

John smiled. “That’s going to start the rumors going. Stackhouse put Laro next door to Lorne.”

 

“I think they are well suited,” Teyla said quietly. “And Laro has been alone a long time. It is a good thing that he is willing to come to Atlantis.”

 

John looked studiously at the floor, which piqued Teyla’s interest. She wondered if Rodney had made any more progress in convincing John to pursue a relationship; Rodney hadn’t approached her for any more advice, and she hadn’t inquired.

 

“I’m going to go make the arrangements,” John said. “I’ll see you later.”

 

Teyla stayed where she was, as did Ronon. “We thought we’d stay to greet Laro and the other Athosians,” she said. “Not that Laro will need help to get settled with Major Lorne here.”

 

Elizabeth smiled. “Understood. You and Ronon will handle training the new guides, of course.”

 

“We will be happy to do so,” Teyla replied, speaking for both of them. “I know my people are anxious to help.”

 

Elizabeth put a hand to her radio. “Major Lorne, welcome back. Teyla and Ronon will greet you and our guests.”

 

Teyla took that as her cue to leave, and she nodded at Elizabeth as she left.

 

“Kanaan went back to Athos,” Ronon observed as they went to meet Major Lorne and the others.

 

Teyla glanced up at him, raising an eyebrow. “Yes?”

 

“Miss him?”

 

“Kanaan and I have known each other since we were children,” Teyla replied. “I kept him company while he was on Atlantis, nothing more.”

 

Ronon grunted.

 

Teyla refused to rise to the bait. Ronon liked to tease, but her feelings regarding Kanaan and her people were complicated. She was grateful for the increased closeness between the Lanteans and the Athosians. She no longer felt quite so torn.

 

But she was still removed from her people; she had no family among the Athosians now that Charin was dead. Teyla had created a new family group on Atlantis, although she was glad to welcome other Athosians to the city.

 

The new guides were milling outside the jumper when Teyla and Ronon joined them. “Welcome,” she said. She knew each of them by name—Ripa, Jesso, Karlen, Bering, and Alaan. “For those of you who do not know him, this is Ronon. We will be the ones training you before you take your place on a gate team. We thank you for you willingness to volunteer.”

 

She saw Lorne exit the back of the jumper with Laro close behind him. “Laro, it has been far too long,” Teyla said.

 

Laro smiled at her. “Teyla. You look well.”

 

Teyla touched her forehead to Laro’s. “Welcome.”

 

“It is good to be here.” Laro took a step back.

 

“Let’s get you settled in,” Lorne said, putting a hand on Laro’s shoulder. “Ronon, would you mind giving us a hand with some of these boxes?”

 

Teyla saw the way that Laro leaned into Lorne, just a little, and she smiled, knowing better than anyone that it was not good to always be alone.

 

~~~~~

 

John liked all the members of SG-1, but there was no denying that the influx of SGC personnel was going to make things more difficult in some respects. He was well aware that the people O’Neill would have sent through the gate were those most likely to be targeted, and that meant higher ranking officers, people who were used to being in charge.

 

Dr. Lam would be a good addition, if only because they could always use another competent doctor. The personnel she’d brought with her would be added to the duty roster, and maybe one of them could serve as relief for Stackhouse, who had assumed the position of quartermaster for the city.

 

John stopped by Stackhouse’s office, finding the younger man tapping busily away on a laptop. His office was neat as a pin, although John wondered if that didn’t have something to do with the new orders to save paper. Printouts had been forbidden unless absolutely necessary.

 

Stackhouse glanced up immediately upon John’s entry. “Good afternoon, sir. I assume you’re here about new quarters for Dr. Lam and the others.”

 

“You read my mind, Sergeant,” John confirmed, sliding into the seat across from his desk. “What have we got?”

 

“We need to start thinking about opening up more rooms,” he replied. “But we should have enough available. With the new ZPM, more areas of the city are open to us.”

 

John nodded. “I’ll put a team on it. How are we with the rest of the supplies?”

 

“We’re running low on uniforms,” Stackhouse admitted. “From what I understand, most of these teams are going to be coming in without much but the clothes on their backs.”

 

John grunted. “We’ve got all that cloth from the Ebrus. Find out who can sew, and if there are any sewing machines.”

 

“Yes, sir.”

 

“Food?”

 

“Not too bad,” Stackhouse replied. “We had enough stockpiled from the _Daedalus_ runs to give us a cushion. The harvest from the Athosians is going to come just in time.”

 

John nodded. “Let me know if we need to send out additional scouting teams,” he ordered. “If we’re running low on something, I want to know about it before it becomes critical.”

 

“You got it,” Stackhouse promised. “Anything else I can do for you, sir?”

 

“Just that,” John replied. “Do you have the files from the SGC on the new people?”

 

Stackhouse shook his head. “No, sir. Those files aren’t available.”

 

“Okay. I want basic information on them—what they did with the SGC, any special talents or helpful hobbies, the whole nine yards. Complete the interviews and send me a report within the week.”

 

“Yes, sir.”

 

John nodded. “Good work, Stackhouse.”

 

“Thank you, sir,” Stackhouse replied, blushing just a little bit.

 

John made his way to the infirmary next, where he found Lam still being checked out by Carson, and SG-1 hanging around, looking out of place and uncomfortable. “Dr. Lam,” he said. “Dr. Weir wants a debrief with all of you tomorrow morning at 10 am.” He glanced at Sam. “You’re more than welcome to be there.”

 

“Thanks, John,” she said quietly. “Carrie, I’ll see you later, okay?”

 

Lam nodded. “You bet. And Sam? General O’Neill is tough. He’ll pull through.”

 

Sam nodded, but she didn’t reply otherwise. Daniel and Vala murmured goodbyes and drifted out as well, but Mitchell stayed where he was, perched on the infirmary bed next to Lam. They were sitting close enough to make John think that there had been something between them back on Earth, or at least the possibility.

 

“Mitchell, I’d like to talk with you when you’ve got a minute,” John said.

 

Mitchell glanced at him, his blue eyes more alert than John was used to seeing. Apparently, Carson had taken him off of the heavy-duty painkillers. “Can I have a minute?”

 

“Take two,” John replied, and followed Carson back to his office. “How is he?”

 

“He’s going to have a lot of physical therapy ahead,” Carson replied quietly. “But there’s enough nerve damage that I think I can safely say he won’t get full use of that hand back.”

 

“Is he cleared to fly?”

 

“A plane, no,” Carson replied. “But a jumper? Yes. The gene therapy was successful. He shouldn’t have any trouble flying one, and I’d like to try him out in the chair, as well.”

 

“You just don’t want to sit in it again,” John replied with a smile.

 

“Not if I can help it,” Carson confessed cheerfully. “Besides, I think it might help him feel useful.”

 

John nodded. “That I think I can do. How are the others?”

 

“Bumps and bruises, some old injuries, but nothing serious,” Carson replied. “They’re in much better shape than SG-1 was.”

 

“Small favors,” John murmured. “Let Stackhouse know if you’re running low on anything. He’s putting together a report.”

 

“Of course, Colonel.”

 

When John emerged from Carson’s office, he found Mitchell waiting for him, his bad hand tucked inside a sling. “You wanted to see me?”

 

“Come on,” John said. “We need to talk.”

 

John led the way to the jumper bay, making sure to keep his pace slow enough for Mitchell to keep up. He was still moving stiffly, still weak from his ordeal. The poison had done a number on his system.

 

“Where are we going?” Mitchell suddenly demanded.

 

“We’re going for a little ride.” John activated his radio. “Elizabeth? Do we have a go?”

 

“Major Lorne is back on the city. Have fun, gentlemen.”

 

Mitchell balked at the entrance to the jumper. “Sheppard, I’m not in any shape to fly.”

 

“You don’t need two hands, but you do need a brain. Carson cleared you, so that’s good enough for me.” John waited patiently for Mitchell to get onboard, and was rewarded a few seconds later when Mitchell finally walked inside and sat down in the co-pilot’s chair.

 

John went through the pre-flight check, and then took the jumper out through the bay doors and up into the atmosphere. He took them into orbit and then turned the controls over to Mitchell.

 

“The HUD comes up when you think about it,” John said.

 

Mitchell frowned, and the HUD popped up, showing where they were in orbit. His good hand went to the controls. “This is amazing.”

 

“There isn’t anything like it,” John replied. “You can’t beat a ship you can fly with your brain.”

 

“The X-302 is fun,” Mitchell defended, taking the jumper back into the atmosphere.

 

“Not a bad ride,” John agreed. He sat back and watched as Mitchell flew over the mainland, taking the jumper through a few maneuvers.

 

Mitchell was a pilot, and flying the jumper apparently came as naturally to him as it had to John. Even with one good hand, he didn’t have any problem controlling the craft, or flying in a straight line—something that Rodney hadn’t yet managed to do.

 

“Carson suggested we try you out on the chair, too,” John said. “I think it’s just because he doesn’t want to sit in it ever again, but you’ve got a good grasp of Ancient tech.”

 

Mitchell didn’t reply at first, but he finally asked, “Trying to make me feel useful, Colonel?”

 

“Every person on Atlantis is useful,” John insisted. “We are going to need every single person on the city. We’re going to need skills that we don’t even know we have. You don’t get to sit on the bench. Nobody does.”

 

John knew his tone was sharp, but he figured Mitchell needed sharp and not soft right now.

 

“What do you want me to do?” Mitchell asked, and there was steel in his voice.

 

“I want you to start learning Elizabeth’s job,” John replied. “Daniel’s got his own thing going on, Vala seems pretty happy, Sam can take over for McKay if it comes to that, and I’ve got Lorne. Elizabeth doesn’t have a relief, and she needs one.”

 

Mitchell blinked. “You want _me_ in charge?”

 

“I want you to be able to take charge if something happens to Elizabeth, and I want you to be able to give her a break,” John corrected him.

 

“Is this your way of telling me I’m not going into the field again?” Mitchell asked, his tone flat.

 

John laughed. “Elizabeth still goes through the gate, Mitchell. So, no.”

 

Mitchell took the jumper through a barrel roll. “Do I have a choice?”

 

“You always have a choice.”

 

“Then, yeah, I’ll take it,” Mitchell replied roughly. “I’ll do it. Should I head back?”

 

“We aren’t in a hurry,” John said. “Take whatever time you need.”

 

They didn’t talk much after that. John could make small talk with the best of them, but he also knew the value of silence, and he sensed that Mitchell needed the space. As they flew over the densely forested mainland, John leaned back in his chair, letting Mitchell fly to his heart’s content.

 

He knew what a boon wide open skies could be, and he figured that Mitchell had never thought to fly like this again. By the time Mitchell turned the jumper back towards Atlantis, some of the tension had left his shoulders, and he appeared calmer, easier inside his own skin.

 

In fact, Mitchell grinned as he landed the jumper in the bay. “Sheppard, thanks for this.”

 

“We can use all the pilots we can get,” John said, deliberately misunderstanding him. “It was pure self-interest on my part.”

 

“Do you think I’ll go through the gate again?” Mitchell asked wistfully.

 

“I wouldn’t rule it out.” John glanced over at him. “Talk to Elizabeth tomorrow. She’ll probably have a list of things for you to do.”

 

John’s heart felt a little lighter as he headed to dinner. To a certain extent, he felt responsible for every person on Atlantis, and that included all the personnel from the SGC who made it to the city. Despair and apathy were as problematic as the Wraith, and he needed Mitchell to shake both off and get to work.

 

That was the reason he’d given permission for Reeves to take his team to the mainland for an extended period of time. Reeves’ team had been tight, and Anson wasn’t dealing well with the loss of one of his teammates. Losing Earth had just made it harder on him. John figured that if they spent a couple of extra weeks with the Athosians, that meant he wouldn’t have to send another team, and he might avoid losing Anson altogether.

 

When John entered the mess, he spotted Rodney sitting with Zelenka and Carter. They appeared to be deep in discussion, and he grabbed a tray and went to join them. Rodney didn’t stop talking when John approached, but he did scoot over, making it clear that John was welcome.

 

“But that doesn’t solve the problem of the power fluctuations!” Rodney protested, gesturing with his fork wildly enough that John ducked.

 

“We can write a new macro,” Sam replied. “If we code it right—”

 

“Yes, yes,” Zelenka said, cutting her off. “But that still doesn’t—”

 

John tuned out at that point, having no idea what they were talking about. He could ask Rodney later, and he might manage to give John an explanation that made sense. John just liked the give and take between the three of them; ideas flew in an exchange of information that made John dizzy, but in a good way.

 

He broke out of his reverie when Rodney put his cookie on John’s tray.

 

John glanced over at him, but Rodney still appeared to be focused on his conversation. A quick check revealed that Rodney had managed to snag one of the last chocolate chip cookies, and he’d put it on John’s tray.

 

This wasn’t the first time Rodney had done something like this in the last couple of weeks. John had some idea of what Rodney was trying to prove, but John was enjoying the fruits of Rodney’s labors far too much to rush him.

 

John ate the cookie, and when he’d finished his meal, he rose from the table.

 

“I should get going, too,” Rodney said, standing with him, cutting Zelenka off in mid-sentence. “I’ll see you tomorrow!”

 

“You could have stayed to finish the conversation,” John said as they deposited their trays.

 

Rodney shot him an annoyed look. “I haven’t seen you all day. I’d like to know what you found. Sam told me a little bit, of course, but she’s too worried about O’Neill to give details.”

 

“What kind of details do you want?” John asked.

 

“You can tell me how Elizabeth took your suggestion, for one,” Rodney replied. “And then you can tell me how Colonel Mitchell did on his first flight.”

 

John grinned. “You did a lot better on your first flight,” he lied.

 

Rodney eyed John suspiciously. “Really?”

 

John schooled his face into a serious expression with some effort. “Yes, really.”

 

Rodney snorted. “You’re lying, but thank you for trying to spare my feelings.”

 

“How did you know?” John protested.

 

“I know you, John,” Rodney replied simply. “So, chess, video golf, or something else?”

 

John thought about the jug of Varani ale he still had in his quarters from his week on the mainland. Halling had given it to him in thanks for his help. “I’ve got a jug of ale in my quarters. We could go out on the pier.”

 

“We’re in time to see the sunset,” Rodney offered.

 

John smiled. “Yeah. That would be about perfect.”


	3. The Hardest Part

_“You know, when I was injured in Antarctica, that was bad, no question. But waking up on Atlantis to find that I’d pretty much lost my right arm—that was worse. I guess I’d never seriously considered the idea that I’d be permanently disabled, although maybe I should have considered the possibility, given what happened to my dad. But I always thought I’d die, or retire. Then again, I’d always planned on retiring on Earth, and look how well that turned out.”_

 

~ Interview with Cameron Mitchell

 

Sam knocked on the door to Elizabeth’s office perfunctorily before stepping inside. “You wanted to see me?”

 

Sam had the strange feeling that she’d just been called to the principal’s office, but she knew that was silly. She wasn’t a child, and she hadn’t done anything that would result in her being in trouble.

 

“Please, have a seat,” Elizabeth said warmly. “How are you settling in?”

 

“Just fine,” Sam replied cautiously. “It’s different, of course, but I think we’re doing all right.”

 

“Everything I hear indicates as much,” she said. “Colonel Sheppard and I were talking yesterday. We both realize that those who come to Atlantis are probably going to be higher ranking officers and skilled scientists.”

 

Sam swallowed. “It’s going to be difficult to find a place for all of us.”

 

“Which is why I wanted to talk to you about being Rodney’s alternate as CSO.”

 

Sam blinked, a little surprised by the request; she hadn’t thought Rodney would relinquish any control. “I’m not sure I understand,” she replied tentatively.

 

“No one on Atlantis gets a day off,” Elizabeth explained. “We rarely get an uninterrupted night’s sleep. John suggested that we start alternating. Rodney would still be CSO, but you’d have authority to act on his behalf, and you would essentially be second in command.”

 

Sam frowned. “What about Zelenka?”

 

“I’m going to split off engineering to give him his own department. He’d still be under Rodney, and technically under you, but engineering is going to have enough to do to keep him busy,” Elizabeth replied.

 

Sam nodded slowly. “That sounds good, but what about the others?”

 

“Rodney has already pushed off the soft sciences to Daniel, which you know,” Elizabeth replied. “John was going to talk to Colonel Mitchell about standing in for me. Dr. Lam will be more than welcome in the infirmary. And, we have every intention of drawing upon the expertise of SG-1 for first contact teams. As you can imagine, it is absolutely imperative that we create new contacts and form new alliances.”

 

Sam released a breath. “So, you think Cam is going to be able to go out into the field again?”

 

“As John pointed out, I go into the field sometimes,” Elizabeth hedged.

 

Sam winced. “I see.”

 

“We’ll do our best to make that happen,” Elizabeth insisted. “There may be accommodations that make it possible.”

 

Sam wasn’t sure how happy Cam would be with that answer, but then she hadn’t seen him since he’d been released him from the infirmary. He seemed to be intent on hiding out—not that Sam could blame him. She would probably want to disappear for a while, too, just to give herself time to wrap her head around everything that had happened.

 

Hell, she’d essentially done that by heading down to the labs and not coming up for air for days at a time.

 

Maybe it was time for her to find Cam, even if she had to dig him out of his hole herself.

 

“Thanks,” Sam finally managed. “You know I’ll do whatever I can.”

 

“This is going to be a difficult adjustment for all of us,” Elizabeth said quietly. “And I imagine it will only get harder as we receive more personnel. But we need every person we can get, and we will use every skill we possess.”

 

Sam straightened a bit. She’d never been entirely sure how she felt about Elizabeth Weir, but she was beginning to understand why Elizabeth had been chosen to lead the expedition.

 

Elizabeth smiled as she added, “And I’m sure, when General O’Neill makes his way to Atlantis, we’ll have another adjustment to make.”

 

Outside of her team, Elizabeth was the first person to use “when” not “if” when speaking about Jack’s escape from Earth. It might be wishful thinking, but she appreciated it.

 

“I wouldn’t worry too much about Jack,” Sam replied. “I don’t think he liked being a general that much.”

 

“That’s too bad,” Elizabeth replied with a smile. “We don’t have a general yet.”

 

Sam left Elizabeth’s office, feeling a little better than when she’d walked in. Stopping by the control room, she asked Chuck, “Do you know where Colonel Mitchell is?”

 

“No, ma’am,” he said regretfully. “But Colonel Sheppard might be able to tell you. Atlantis will usually give him a lot more information.”

 

Sam raised her eyebrows, wishing that the gene therapy had worked better for her. Her control over Ancient tech was spotty at best; she had a lot better luck with Goa’uld healing devices, which wasn’t saying much.

 

“Thanks, Chuck,” she said. “I guess I’ll look in all the usual places.”

 

The trouble was, Sam wasn’t sure what “the usual places” entailed. Cam had been in the infirmary until a few days ago, and she had no idea where he might be now. Some instinct made her head to the jumper bay because she remembered Sheppard saying something about taking Cam up in a jumper since the gene therapy had worked for him.

 

When she entered the bay, Sam heard voices coming from the open hatch of one of the jumpers. “This crystal, here, will control the environment. It can be replaced with _this_ one here for quick fix.”

 

She approached slowly, not wanting to startle them, as well as being curious as to what Zelenka was doing.

 

“This is going to take me twice as long working with one hand,” Cam complained. “Wouldn’t it be easier to take an engineer along?”

 

“Do you think engineers grow on trees?” Zelenka asked sharply. “No. They are trained, and we do not have enough. Rodney and I agreed. Everyone who flies a jumper must know something of how they work, even if it is very basic.”

 

“Fair enough,” Cam said, suitably chastened.

 

Sam stuck her head inside the hatch. “Hey. Am I interrupting?”

 

“Just me making a fool out of myself,” Cam replied.

 

“You are doing fine,” Zelenka said. “I find that pilots are all the same—smart, but they pretend to not be so intelligent. Colonel Sheppard is the same way.”

 

Cam flushed slightly, but he didn’t argue.

 

Zelenka turned to look at her. “Sam, would you like to join us?”

 

She smiled. “I was hoping you’d ask. I haven’t been able to get my hands on a jumper yet.” She glanced at Cam. “So, did Sheppard take you up?”

 

Cam’s face lit up in a way she hadn’t seen since Earth. “Yeah, he did. It was pretty cool.”

 

Sam looked towards the pilot’s seat longingly. “I wish.”

 

“If wishes were fishes,” Cam murmured, his expression becoming melancholy again.

 

Zelenka cleared his throat. “Very good. Now, Colonel Mitchell, you will show Sam the basics, and I will correct you when necessary. We learn best by teaching others.”

 

Cam straightened his shoulders, and Sam watched as he touched the sling that cradled his right arm. It was becoming an unconscious gesture, one she didn’t know how to interpret. Was Cam reminding himself that he _had_ to learn new skills in order to survive? Or was it a sign of mourning what he’d lost?

 

Of all of them, Cam had the most visible scars, but they were all grieving in their own ways; they had all suffered incalculable losses, and being in Atlantis was small consolation.

 

~~~~~

 

Jack groaned as he threw down his cards. “You’re cheating.”

 

Jon grinned smugly. “Looks like you’ll be doing the dishes for the foreseeable future.”

 

Jack opened his mouth to respond hotly, but Cassie interrupted. “Teal’c? When is Master Bra’tac supposed to arrive?”

 

“Tomorrow,” Teal’c replied.

 

Jack was looking forward to getting off this rock. He was beginning to go a little bit stir crazy; he wanted to be _doing_ something. He wanted to get to Atlantis.

 

Jack wanted confirmation that Sam and Daniel and the others were okay.

 

“So, we’re really going to Atlantis,” Cassie said.

 

“You don’t have to go,” Jack said gently.

 

Cassie rolled her eyes. “Of course I do. I’m going, Jack.”

 

“What the hell are we going to do once we get there?” Jon asked.

 

Jack shrugged, and winced when the movement pulled at his still-healing ribs. “I imagine we’ll do whatever we need to do. T? You sure we can’t change your mind?”

 

“When you return, you will need an ally in this galaxy,” Teal’c replied with every sign that he believed Jack _would_ come back to the Milky Way.

 

Jack wasn’t sure about that.

 

“Is Bra’tac going to get in trouble for giving us a ship?” Cassie asked.

 

Teal’c shook his head. “No. Bra’tac still has allies, and the free Jaffa owe O’Neill a great debt. A ship is the least we can give him.”

 

“Gee, thanks,” Jack replied. “We’re going to need to lay in supplies. That’s not a short trip.”

 

“You will get the supplies you need,” Teal’c assured him. “Bra’tac is taking care of it.”

 

“Bra’tac takes care of everything,” Jon observed. “I’m going for a walk.”

 

Cassie watched him go with a frown. “Do you think he’s okay?”

 

“He doesn’t like the forced inactivity,” Jack said, knowing how his clone felt.

 

Cassie sighed. “I really wish I’d brought more books.”

 

“I wouldn’t mind watching a movie,” Jack said.

 

“I would like to see _Star Wars_ again,” Teal’c said, the hint of a smile playing around his mouth.

 

Cassie laughed. “How many times have you seen those movies?”

 

“Twelve,” Teal’c admitted. “They are very good movies.”

 

“I prefer _Indiana Jones_ ,” Cassie said.

 

Jack grinned. Teal’c loved _Star Wars_ more than was reasonable. “Have you ever watched those movies with Daniel?”

 

“Once,” Cassie replied. “He wasn’t impressed.”

 

“You should try watching _The Mummy_ with him some time,” Jack said. “It drives him _nuts_.”

 

“It’s probably a lot like watching a science flick with Sam.” Cassie grinned. “You should have heard her go on and on about _The Core_.”

 

Jack smiled fondly. “Yeah.”

 

He missed his team.

 

Teal’c gave Jack a sharp look. “You should rest, O’Neill.”

 

Jack sighed. “How do you do that?”

 

“I know you,” Teal’c said simply. “Tomorrow, you leave for Atlantis, and you are not yet fully recovered.”

 

Jack couldn’t argue with Teal’c’s assessment. “I’m getting too old for this shit.”

 

“You’re not old!” Cassie objected.

 

Jack appreciated her defense, but he couldn’t agree. “Getting old is better than the alternative, Cassie.”

 

She shook her head, her expression still troubled, and Jack suspected that she was thinking of all the people she’d lost to something other than old age, and of the chances of losing Jack.

 

To Jack, and probably to Cassie, the galaxy seemed to be getting more dangerous, and he hated that. He hated that he’d spent the last ten years fighting to make things safer, better, and that he’d failed. Sometimes it seemed like he would always fail.

 

Teal’c stood. “Come, Cassandra. Let’s go for a walk.”

 

Jack knew how good Teal’c was at listening, and he thought Cassie could probably use the chance to unload before being stuck on a ship with him and Jon.

 

With luck, they’d all survive the coming journey.

 

~~~~~

 

Vala stood in the doorway of Daniel’s office, which was already crowded with boxes of artifacts Rodney had off-loaded onto him. Most were inert, or of no scientific value. There were a few things that had been discovered off-world that seemed more like the archaeological items found in Daniel’s office on Earth—old books with crumbling pages, ancient tablets, stone statuettes.

 

At the moment, Daniel was bent over a laptop, typing away furiously. As far as Vala could tell, he hadn’t noticed her standing in the doorway, even though she’d been there for more than five minutes.

 

“Daniel?” she finally called. “Do you want lunch?”

 

“I’m kind of in the middle of this,” he replied absently. “Give me a minute.”

 

“That’s what you said an hour ago.”

 

Her tone was sharper than she’d intended, and he looked up with a frown. “It’s been that long?”

 

“Yes, it has, and I’m hungry,” she said. “If you don’t want to eat, just say so.”

 

“How about getting dinner later?” he suggested, clearly meaning it as a peace offering.

 

Vala just wished she weren’t so easily appeased where Daniel was concerned. “Very well, but I’m holding you to that.”

 

He gave her a crooked grin. “Great. Thanks, Vala.”

 

“Right,” she muttered as she headed for the mess. Lunch no longer held quite the appeal it had when she thought she’d be eating with Daniel.

 

The problem was that Vala was bored. Cam had been released from the infirmary, but he was uncommunicative and surly, maybe because Sam and Daniel had thrown themselves into their work.

 

John had insisted that Atlantis needed everyone, but Vala was having trouble seeing where she fit in. For the past few months, she’d felt as though she was a part of something important, part of a family. Her skills had kept her team alive and safe, but she felt as though she’d been shunted off to the side on Atlantis.

 

In truth, she felt unneeded and unwanted, and she had far too much time to think, and to remember. Vala didn’t like it; she wanted to stay busy.

 

The mess was nearly empty by the time she filled a tray, and she sat at an empty table feeling very sorry for herself.

 

And Vala rarely felt sorry for herself, which made it that much worse.

 

“Is anyone else sitting here?”

 

Vala glanced up to see Teyla standing next to her table. “No, go ahead.”

 

Teyla smiled. “You look as though you could use company.”

 

“I’m afraid my lunch date abandoned me,” Vala admitted

 

“Yes, Dr. Jackson seemed very taken with the Ancient database. Rodney can also become similarly caught up in his work.” Teyla offered a sympathetic look.

 

Vala sighed. “They’re not the only ones.”

 

“If you’re bored, you could ask Colonel Sheppard to assign you to a gate team,” Teyla suggested.

 

Vala wanted to protest that she already had a gate team, but she didn’t know if that was true. Cam wouldn’t be going back into the field for some time, if he ever did, and the others had work that seemed engrossing.

 

“Maybe I will,” she replied. “I don’t like not having anything to do.”

 

Teyla nodded. “Then after lunch we will speak to Sergeant Stackhouse and Colonel Sheppard. They will know where your services can best be used.”

 

Teyla was as good as her word; she led the way to a small office down the corridor from the conference room after they had finished their meal. “Sergeant, you’ve met Vala Mal Doran, haven’t you?” Teyla asked the young man.

 

He smiled. “No, I don’t think we’ve been formally introduced. Pleased to meet you, ma’am.”

 

“Just Vala,” she replied, wrinkling her nose. “Anything else makes me feel old.”

 

His smile broadened. “We wouldn’t want that. What can I do for you ladies?”

 

“I’d like something to do,” Vala replied. “I’m bored.”

 

Stackhouse leaned back in his chair, his gaze shrewd. “All right. What can you do?”

 

“I can handle weapons, fly most ships, and I can steal almost anything,” Vala replied readily.

 

He blinked at that last. “Can you sew?”

 

Vala grimaced. “I have, but it wasn’t pretty.”

 

He shrugged. “I had to ask. We don’t have a lot of tailors here, and we need new uniforms. How strong is your gene?”

 

“Not very,” she admitted.

 

To her surprise, he grinned. “Perfect. We need to continue our explorations of the city and get a better map. We need more quarters, and the new ZPM woke up parts of the city we’re unfamiliar with.”

 

It wasn’t going off-world, but it was better than sitting around, doing nothing. “Great.”

 

“I’ll talk to the colonel about putting you on the rotation for gate teams, too,” he added. “I haven’t heard what he wants to do about SG-1 yet.”

 

Vala nodded. “Of course. Thank you.”

 

“No problem,” he replied cheerfully. He reached in a drawer for a packet of papers. “If you’d fill that out, that will help, too. I’m trying to get a comprehensive picture of all the skills represented on Atlantis. There are a couple of survey teams going out tomorrow morning, so be in the conference room at 0900. Dr. McKay wants to give you all the speech.”

 

Teyla thanked Stackhouse in her formal manner, and Vala echoed it, staring at the papers in her hand. “What am I supposed to do with these?”

 

“I believe Sergeant Stackhouse is collecting information on hobbies and other talents that do not appear in your file,” Teyla explained.

 

Vala frowned. “I don’t think I have a file.”

 

Teyla shrugged. “Then he will definitely need that information. I have a training session with the other Athosians now.”

 

Physical activity sounded really good right about now. “Do you mind if I join you?”

 

Teyla gave her a measuring look. “If you’d like.”

 

“I would,” Vala replied and meant it.

 

She’d have preferred a round of sex, but since Daniel couldn’t be pried out of his research, Vala would just have to make due with a sparring session.

 

~~~~~

 

Cam had never pictured himself as an administrator. He had always been, first and foremost, a pilot. And if being in charge of SG-1 had felt like a stretch at times, being in charge of _Atlantis_ , no matter how briefly, was even worse.

 

But Dr. Weir seemed to be sincerely grateful when Cam showed up in her office the day after he’d been cleared for light duty, as requested.

 

“Thank you for agreeing to take this on, Colonel Mitchell,” she said. “You don’t know how long it’s been since I had a day off.”

 

He smiled. “I can imagine, and it’s Cam.”

 

“Call me Elizabeth,” she replied. “The problem with this job is that there’s really nothing I could tell you that would prepare you fully.”

 

Cam grimaced, thinking of some of the situations he’d run across while on SG-1. “I think I know what you mean,” he replied.

 

She laughed. “You probably do. The best advice I can give you is to follow your instincts.”

 

“My instincts might be a little different than yours,” he warned her. “I’m still military.”

 

Elizabeth’s expression was shrewd. “I’m well acquainted with how the military works, Cam, but as a member of SG-1, you are expected to be able to exercise diplomacy and civility.”

 

Cam frowned. “True.”

 

“I won’t tell you that’s all you’ll need, but I will say that those abilities will serve you well.” Elizabeth shrugged. “We’re all feeling our way here. How’s your hand?”

 

He glanced down at the sling before he could stop himself. “There’s a lot of pain some days,” he admitted. “But I’m off the strong stuff.” He felt compelled to add, “The doc thinks I’ll get about 30-percent back, and Carrie agreed when she looked at it.”

 

Elizabeth’s face softened with sympathy. “I’m sorry. I know that must have been hard to hear.”

 

Cam hitched a shoulder, unwilling to go into more detail. He had no desire to talk about his feelings. He wasn’t even certain _how_ to feel at this point.

 

The gate alarm sounded, and Elizabeth frowned. “We don’t have any teams off-world right now,” she said with surprise.

 

Cam rose with her and followed her to the gate room.

 

“Chuck? What have we got?” Elizabeth asked.

 

He shook his head. “I’m not receiving an IDC, Dr. Weir.”

 

“Keep the shield up,” she ordered.

 

Cam shifted uneasily, wondering if anyone from the SGC would have made it to Pegasus without a functioning IDC. “Could it be SGC personnel?”

 

“Perhaps,” Elizabeth replied. “But if it is, then they should know to radio us if they don’t have an IDC.”

 

“There’s no radio transmission,” Chuck said. “And still no IDC.”

 

A hush had fallen over the gate room. Cam’s radio crackled in his ear as Sheppard spoke on the all-call channel. “Elizabeth? What’s the problem?”

 

“We don’t know yet,” she said. “We have an active wormhole, but no IDC, and no radio transmission.”

 

“I’m on my way,” Sheppard said.

 

Suddenly, Chuck said, “Dr. Weir, I’m receiving an IDC from M7G-677.”

 

Cam frowned, trying to remember if he’d read that mission report; he was still catching up on the ones from Atlantis. “Isn’t that the planet with all the kids?”

 

“Yes, it is. We don’t do much trading with them, but we do visit on a regular basis to provide medical aid and repair their shield generator.” Elizabeth crossed her arms and nodded at the Marines stationed around the gate. They had already been standing with their weapons ready, but now Cam heard them chambering a round. “Chuck, send confirmation and lower the shield.”

 

The gate room was so quiet Cam figured he could have heard a pin drop, and seconds later, a boy of about 12 stumbled through the gate at about the same time that Sheppard hit the gate room at a dead run.

 

“Colonel Sheppard!” the boy called, immediately spotting him.

 

“What happened, Petras?” Sheppard asked.

 

The boy shook his head. “Men with guns came through the gate. Keras sent me.”

 

Sheppard put a hand on Petras’ shoulder, looking him up and down. “Are you hurt?”

 

Petras shook his head. “No, I can run much faster than they can, and they’re loud.”

 

A ghost of a smile touched Sheppard’s lips. “Good for you. How many men?”

 

Petras shook his head. “More than our village.”

 

Cam had followed Elizabeth down to the gate room while they listened to the conversation. Up close, he could see that Petras was dressed in rough cloth and animal skins, paint marking his face, his thin chest heaving with exertion.

 

Sheppard turned to look at Elizabeth. “We have to send a team.”

 

“We don’t know what we’re dealing with,” she objected.

 

Sheppard frowned. “They have to be Genii. There’s no other possibility.”

 

Elizabeth looked at the boy. “What did these men look like? What were they wearing?”

 

“Uniforms like yours, but gray and brown, with buttons here,” he replied, running two fingers down his chest, on either side of his sternum. “The man in charge had pits in his face.”

 

Sheppard growled. “ _Kolya_. I should have killed him when I had the chance. What did they want, Petras?”

 

Petras shook his head. “They were waving guns around, and they were angry. Keras told me to find Colonel Sheppard. There were men around the gate, but some of the others led them away. Please! We have to hurry!”

 

“Take two teams,” Elizabeth said. “Let us know if you need reinforcements.”

 

Sheppard tapped his radio. “Ronon, Teyla, I need you in the gate room. We’ve got a Genii problem. Cadman, I need you and five Marines, and I need you all here five minutes ago.”

 

Cam was impressed by how quickly the teams arrived. Less than ten minutes after Sheppard had put out the call, there were half a dozen Marines in front of the gate, ready to fall out. Ronon and Teyla were seconds behind them, with Vala hot on their heels.

 

“Where do you think you’re going?” Cam asked, seeing that she was wearing a tac vest, a 9 mil in a thigh holster and a zat in her hand.

 

Vala gave him a cool look. “Cam, I’ve been sitting around here for two weeks. I’m bored.”

 

Sheppard glanced at Cam, then at Vala, and back to Cam, a silent question in his eyes, acknowledging that Vala was still a member of his team.

 

And, while Cam didn’t like the idea of Vala going out without the rest of SG-1 to watch her back, he understood _why_ she wanted to go. “Be careful,” he cautioned.

 

“I always am,” she replied with a saucy smile.

 

Cam tucked his good hand into his pocket and watched as Sheppard shrugged into the tac vest that Ronon had brought with him. Sheppard clipped on a P-90 and checked the gun in his thigh holster.

 

“You have a go, John,” Elizabeth said. “Be careful.”

 

“As careful as I can be,” he promised. “All right, people, we’re hunting Genii. We’re going to try to avoid killing anybody, but don’t hesitate to take the shot if they threaten you or any of the kids. Let’s go.”

 

Cam watched as the wormhole whooshed to life, feeling a longing so intense it made him absolutely breathless. As it blinked out, he was surprised to feel Elizabeth’s hand on his left arm. “Sometimes I think it’s harder to stay behind than it is to walk through the gate,” she murmured.

 

He swallowed. “Yeah. It’s definitely harder.”

 

~~~~~

 

Daniel blinked at his computer screen, a little surprised at the time that showed in the corner of his screen. It was well past the dinner hour, and he rubbed his eyes, trying to remember when he’d last talked to anyone.

 

He’d seen Vala around lunchtime; he’d promised that he’d eat dinner with her.

 

Feeling a stab of guilt, Daniel saved his work and shut down his computer. He hated to quit when he’d been working so well all day, creating an efficient indexing system for the Ancient database, but he _had_ promised Vala dinner.

 

In truth, Daniel felt a little guilty. He and Sam had their work, and Mitchell had physical therapy and his recovery, but Vala was at loose ends.

 

He called Vala on the radio, surprised when she didn’t respond. He called Sam next. “Do you know where Vala is?” he asked when she responded.

 

“You haven’t heard?” Sam replied.

 

Daniel felt a chill. “Heard what?”

 

“Vala left with a team a couple of hours ago,” Sam replied. “Are you in your lab?”

 

“Yeah,” he said slowly, feeling a sick sense of dread.

 

“I’ll be there in a minute.”

 

Sam showed up so quickly that Daniel knew she had probably been on her way already. She sat down in one of the chairs and waved him to the other. “There was an emergency off-world.”

 

“I got that much,” Daniel snapped, worry causing his temper to flare. “What happened?”

 

“Vala was with Teyla and Ronon when the call came in,” Sam began apologetically. “Cam was in the gate room when she left. I guess we figured that she’d told you she was leaving.”

 

Daniel frowned. “What the hell happened?”

 

“There’s a planet populated mostly by kids,” Sam began. “A group of Genii showed up and starting waving guns around, and their leader sent one of the younger ones to Atlantis. John took Ronon, Teyla, Vala, and a group of Marines to investigate.”

 

“And Cam let her go?” Daniel demanded.

 

Sam raised her hands in surrender. “Hey, I didn’t know what was going on until after she’d left. Cam agreed to let her go.”

 

Daniel was a little amused at Sam’s willingness to throw Mitchell under the bus. “And there’s been no word.”

 

Sam shook her head. “But it’s only been a couple of hours, and there were about thirty Genii.”

 

Daniel _really_ didn’t like those odds. “There are ten of them.”

 

“I’ve been reliably informed that John has killed dozens of Genii by himself,” Sam offered apologetically. “And you’ve seen Ronon and Teyla. Vala can take care of herself.”

 

“What was Cam thinking?” Daniel demanded. “What was _she_ thinking?”

 

“Probably that she was bored.” Sam shrugged. “You know Vala. She was cooped up on that ship for a couple of weeks, and it’s not like there’s much to keep her occupied on Atlantis.”

 

Except for me, Daniel thought. He could have had lunch with her. Instead, he’d been too busy, and that had probably been the main reason she’d left without at least notifying him.

 

“Have you eaten dinner yet?” Sam asked.

 

“No,” he admitted. “I was supposed to eat with Vala.”

 

“Come on, then,” Sam said, but her tone of voice made it an order.

 

Daniel didn’t mind following her orders.

 

When they entered the mess, Daniel could see Mitchell sitting with Elizabeth at a table under one of the long windows, along with Zelenka and McKay. Daniel recognized in them the nervous energy that always seemed to come with waiting for news that threatened to be very bad.

 

Elizabeth moved closer to McKay without being asked, making room for Daniel, while Sam plopped down next to Cam. “Any word?” Daniel asked.

 

“Not yet,” Mitchell said. Then, apparently picking up on Daniel’s anger, he asked, “Didn’t you know?”

 

“Sam told me,” Daniel said sourly. “Why didn’t you call one of us?”

 

“There wasn’t time,” Mitchell said. “And I thought Vala would have told you.”

 

Daniel was uncomfortably reminded of how his relationship with Sarah had ended, after he’d forgotten one anniversary—one date—too many. He didn’t want the same thing to happen with Vala.

 

He’d lost too much to lose her as well.

 

The quiet that fell over the table was uncomfortable, and Daniel picked at his meal, his appetite having fled with the news that Vala had gone off-world.

 

“What’s the situation with the Genii?” Daniel finally asked.

 

Elizabeth sighed. “They’re a thorn in our side. About six months ago, they kidnapped a number of our people, including Major Lorne, and tried to blackmail us into giving them weapons and other supplies. We have a détente with the new leader, but we know there are other factions, including one led by Acastus Kolya.”

 

“And now they’ve attacked a planet full of children,” McKay added with disgust. “We should have killed Kolya the last time we had a chance.”

 

McKay sounded unusually bloodthirsty, and Daniel wondered what had happened to cause that kind of animosity.

 

“We don’t know what’s happened yet. Even if it is Kolya, he may have been carrying out orders—not that that excuses his actions,” Elizabeth said in a measured tone. “Colonel Sheppard will contact us as soon as he can.”

 

“And if he can’t?” McKay demanded. “Someone should have told me they were leaving.”

 

“What would you have been able to do?” Daniel asked, raising his eyebrows. He hadn’t been under the impression that McKay did a lot of fighting in the field.

 

McKay glared at him. “I don’t know because _I’m not there_. I’m sure you wanted to go, and I could ask you the same question.”

 

Daniel bristled. The days when he’d barely been able to hit the broad side of a barn were long over. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”

 

“Enough,” Elizabeth said with some force. “We’re all worried. Rodney, Teyla and Ronon are with John, and Keras is a capable leader for his people.” Daniel suspected that she’d added that last bit for his benefit, as well as for Sam and Mitchell. “Waiting is always the hardest part,” she added quietly.

 

Daniel couldn’t argue.

 

~~~~~

 

It had been far too long since Vala had gone through the gate, and it felt good to be active again.

 

In fact, she’d had a fairly good day after the disappointment of earlier. She missed spending time with her team, but she’d spent an enjoyable hour with Teyla, Ronon, and the Athosian guides, and then had an abbreviated lesson with Teyla on using the _bantos_.

 

Vala was even more interested in learning self-defense techniques now after spending a week in a dungeon being groped and worse. Learning how to beat someone with sticks sounded like a hell of a lot of fun.

 

And it had been, right up until Teyla and Ronon had received the emergency call. At that point, Vala had no intention of being left behind. When Vala had insisted on coming along, Teyla had smiled and said, “Colonel Sheppard will make the final decision, but it may be easier to beg pardon than to ask permission.”

 

Ronon had grinned. “You’ve got some nice moves.”

 

Coming from Ronon, Vala had recognized the compliment.

 

Colonel Sheppard had given her a sharp look, and he’d looked to Cam for permission—which irritated Vala to no end—but Cam _had_ given permission. And Vala didn’t mind going after a group of people terrorizing children.

 

Sheppard kept Petras behind him, leading the way through the gate, with Ronon and Teyla close behind him. Vala stayed in between them and the Marines who covered the rear. The gate was still deserted. Apparently the children here were very good at leading attackers away from the gate and keeping them distracted.

 

“Stay sharp, people,” Sheppard ordered.

 

Vala held her gun in steady hands, feeling strangely at home among these people. She liked this part of the job; Vala liked knowing she could make a difference.

 

They moved as quietly as possible through the thick underbrush, the trees providing almost unbroken shade overhead. Sheppard held up a hand, signaling them to come to a halt. Vala froze, hearing someone moving just up ahead.

 

“Petras?” Sheppard whispered.

 

The boy shook his head, his green eyes wide. “ _It’s them_.”

 

“Stay down,” Sheppard ordered Petras. “Spread out,” he ordered the rest of them.

 

Vala caught Teyla’s eye, and Teyla jerked her head in Ronon’s direction. Vala nodded and followed Ronon as he moved through the trees. He moved almost silently, and she did her best to emulate him.

 

The Genii were hard to see in the trees, their uniforms providing decent camouflage, but Ronon led her unerringly to where they were moving somewhat less quietly. Ronon raised his weapon, and Vala raised her zat, firing twice. Both Genii went down silently, and Vala shared a triumphant grin with Ronon.

 

“Not quite as fun as Wraith hunting,” he observed.

 

She smiled. “I think I’d prefer to take your word for that.”

 

“We’ll head for the village,” Ronon replied.

 

They hadn’t gone very far when she heard the sound of gunfire, but it wasn’t quite right to Vala’s ears. She knew how Earth weapons sounded, but this was something different.

 

“Genii,” Ronon growled and began to run.

 

Vala followed, pushing herself to keep up, her breath coming in short gasps. Ronon’s longer legs gave him the advantage, and he seemed to dodge branches and thorns with an instinct she couldn’t hope to match.

 

They broke through the trees into a small, natural clearing, only to find one Marine on the ground, half of his face blown off. Vala couldn’t remember his name, if she’d ever known it, but she recognized shock in the other Marine’s face, and in his pale skin and shaking hands.

 

“They killed him,” he said. “I think I got them, but he went down before we even knew they were there.”

 

Sheppard burst into the clearing with Teyla and the rest of the Marines. Sheppard’s mouth went tight at the sight of the body, and his eyes blazed with fury. Even the seemingly unflappable Teyla appeared ready to tear the Genii’s heads off their bodies with her bare hands.

 

“Petras,” Sheppard called.

 

The boy popped up almost out of nowhere. “Yes, Colonel?”

 

“We need the best, fastest way to get to the village. I want to check on the others and make sure they’re safe, and then we’ll clear this trash out.” Sheppard’s mouth twisted. “I know it’s asking a lot, but—”

 

“They came into our homes and threatened us,” Petras replied with a steely determination beyond his years. “I will help.”

 

“Of course you will.” Sheppard’s smile didn’t reach his eyes. “The rest of you, stay close.”

 

Ronon growled wordlessly. “We already killed two. We can pick a few more off.”

 

Vala could see the war going on behind Sheppard’s eyes as he tried to decide whether he wanted to keep his people with him, thereby preserving the illusion of their safety, or whether to let Ronon kill as many Genii as he could.

 

“All right,” Sheppard finally agreed. “Good hunting.”

 

“We can’t just leave him here, sir,” the young Marine protested. Vala read the name on his uniform pocket—Barnes. His young, unlined face was innocent, and paralyzed with grief.

 

“There’s nothing more we can do for him, Corporal,” Sheppard replied, more gently than Vala would have expected. “We’ll come back for him later.”

 

Barnes shook his head in denial. “Sir—”

 

“Barnes, I need you to protect Petras. Can you do that?” Sheppard’s voice was still gentle.

 

Barnes glanced at the boy, and his spine straightened. “Yes, sir.”

 

“Good,” Sheppard replied. “Looking after him is your job.”

 

Vala caught the look that Sheppard gave Petras, and watched the boy nod imperceptibly. If she didn’t miss her guess, Petras would be the one looking after Barnes, and not the other way around. Right now, however, Barnes needed something else to focus on other than his friend’s death.

 

“Let’s go,” Ronon said to her, and Vala followed him back into the trees. She’d hunted before, and she’d chased down prey, but Ronon was obviously an expert, and she let him lead.

 

Vala was infused by a white-hot anger as she thought about Barnes’ lost expression and obvious grief, and the young Marine who had been killed. These Genii were bad people, and Vala would lose no sleep over their deaths.

 

Ronon led them to a small rise that allowed them to look over a clearing where another two Genii waited, looking vaguely bored. She and Ronon fired as one, and both Genii went down. Vala fired the kill shot, and then fired a third shot to disintegrate the body.

 

“Do the other one,” Ronon said.

 

Vala did as he asked, and the second body disappeared. “Next?” she asked.

 

Ronon grinned, clearly approving of her bloodthirstiness. “We’ll find someone.” He looked at the zat. “Pretty cool.”

 

“Isn’t it, though?” Vala asked. “Let’s move.”

 

She trusted that Ronon would find the next nearest set of Genii, and she wasn’t disappointed. They found another pair of Genii soldiers only a few minutes later, and they took them out as well.

 

Vala had never found it easy to kill, but the Genii were making her revise that opinion. She felt her rage build and knew that it was a combination of what the Genii had done here, and the losses she’d faced over the last few months.

 

This kind of hunting was pleasure unmixed with pain. She could take out all her frustrations, all her fears, on an enemy she could easily kill.

 

They killed four more Genii before they headed for the village. Vala decided that she liked hunting with Ronon. It was relaxing, because all she had to do was point and shoot.

 

Ronon led the way back towards the village, and Vala braced herself for what she was likely to see. She hated the idea of dead children.

 

As they approached the village, they killed another couple of Genii, and judging by the smell, it was where the latrines had been dug, which explained why there were so few Genii there.

 

Vala didn’t think there were many enemies left, and she didn’t think it would be hard to kill the rest of them.

 

In fact, Vala welcomed the challenge. Her thirst for blood hadn’t yet been satisfied.

 

Maybe, she thought, it never would.


	4. An Eye for an Eye

_“We expected the Wraith to be a problem, but I had thought we’d reached an agreement with Ladon Radim of the Genii. Kolya’s attack on M7G-677 came as a complete surprise, but that was just the beginning. It seemed that someone had passed along word that Atlantis no longer had the support of Earth, and Kolya saw that as an opportunity to begin a war of attrition, attempting to force our allies to cut us off, thinking they could take Atlantis that way. The Genii greatly underestimated our resolve, however, as well as the faith our friends had placed in us.”_

 

 

~Interview with Elizabeth Weir

 

Righteous anger suffused John. He couldn’t get the sight of Cooper’s mangled face out of his mind. Cooper had been John’s responsibility; killing Kolya had been John’s job. The blood that was shed here would be on John’s hands.

 

Petras led them unerringly through the forest towards the village with Barnes keeping close to the boy, clearly focused on the job at hand rather than his dead friend.

 

John knew the crash would come later, when reality sank in. For now, though, Barnes would do his job.

 

Chaos reigned in the village when they approached; judging by the number of Genii on the ground who were dead or dying, Keras’ people—kids—had made a good showing. Still, there were a number of too-small bodies on the ground, and John’s rage rose up to choke him.

 

He stuffed it down, knowing that it wouldn’t help. He needed a cool head right now.

 

“If it’s Genii, and it moves, don’t hesitate to shoot,” John called out, and then he headed into the village at a quick jog, staying low.

 

The kids were fighting from concealment; arrows and spears were flying out of the trees any time one of the Genii appeared. John let his P-90 hang from the strap, using his service weapon for accuracy. He didn’t want to risk hitting one of the kids. The others followed his lead. John could see the arrows flying, and he could hear shouts and cries of pain.

 

John dropped two Genii without hesitation when they poked their heads up to fire on the kids, and Teyla fired from behind him, dropping a third. The other Marines moved as a unit, staying low and shooting sparingly.

 

John saw one of them—Kim—go down hard, clutching at her thigh. “I’ve got her, sir!” Cadman assured him.

 

John refocused on the battle, knowing that he couldn’t get Kim help until they’d dealt with the Genii.

 

The rest of it passed in a blur of blood and violence. At one point, the remaining Genii rushed him, and John had to pull out his K-bar for close quarters fighting. In some ways, it was more satisfying to shove his knife between ribs, to slash at throats and arms and legs. Here, John could funnel his anger into action.

 

When every Genii was dead or dying, John finally took a moment to breathe, his knife hanging limply by his side, dripping with blood. He took in a lungful of air, smelling blood and gunpowder, and glanced at the bodies of the Genii. John hadn’t seen Kolya anywhere, which probably meant the bastard had managed to escape.

 

He looked around, trying to spot Keras. “Keras!” John called.

 

“Sheppard!” Aries came jogging out of the woods. “You came.”

 

“Of course I did,” John replied. “Where’s Keras?”

 

Aries’ lips formed a thin line. “This way.”

 

John followed him through the trees, feeling a sharp pang of sorrow when Aries led him to Keras’ body. Keras’ sightless eyes were open, staring up at the canopy above them, and John reached out with a trembling hand to close his eyelids. John let his hand rest on Keras’ forehead for a moment.

 

“I’m sorry I couldn’t get here sooner,” John said quietly.

 

Aries nodded. “I’m glad you could come. We weren’t winning.”

 

John hung his head. “We need to call Atlantis. They’ll send a medical team to help the injured.”

 

“I’ll send Neleus and Petras,” Aries replied. “Unless you want to go.”

 

John shook his head. “I don’t need to. Ronon and Vala will be on their way. They should be clearing out the rest of the Genii from around the perimeter.”

 

“I’ll let the others know to let them pass,” Aries promised.

 

“I need to retrieve a body,” John said.

 

Aries nodded. “I’ll send a couple of my people with you.”

 

“I’ll take care of it,” John replied. “See to your people.”

 

John headed back to the village, motioning towards Barnes. “Stay with Petras,” he ordered. “They need to call in medical help from Atlantis.”

 

“Yes, sir,” Barnes said.

 

“Petras, Neleus, head for the gate and call for help,” Aries ordered.

 

The other kids were beginning to drift in from the forest, weapons still at the ready. They seemed to relax one by one as they realized the Genii were no longer a threat.

 

Even without the threat, however, there was still the matter of cleaning up the mess: injured to treat, bodies to bury, and all the rest.

 

John headed for Kim, who seemed to be stable. Cadman had put a field bandage on Kim’s thigh wound, and she’d gotten the bleeding under control. “Good work, Laura,” John said quietly. “Kim, how are you doing?”

 

“Just fine, sir,” she assured him. “I’ll be back on duty in no time.”

 

“We’ll let Beckett be the judge of that. You just do what the doctor orders, and don’t worry about the rest.”

 

“Yes, sir,” she replied snappily.

 

John smiled. “Good soldier.”

 

The other injuries were minor—mostly scrapes and bruises, although one of the other Marines had a bullet crease in his arm. John went around to the others, checking in with them individually, making sure they were okay.

 

The kids seemed to be okay, although a few of them looked like they were in shock. John let Aries handle them, because he was their leader now that Keras was dead.

 

John helped out with first aid where he could, bandaging up kids that had been too small to run away, and had gotten in the way of the weapons fire. Every body was another reminder that he’d failed.

 

He just about lost it over the tiny body of a three-year-old. Her eyes were wide and dark, and the bullet had torn her chest open. War was terrible, and this was the evidence.

 

John rubbed his eyes. “Dammit,” he muttered.

 

“John? Are you okay?” Teyla asked.

 

“She’s so small,” John murmured. “She’s just a baby.”

 

“She is,” Teyla agreed. “This was a terrible crime.”

 

John nodded. “Yeah, it was. And I want those responsible to pay.”

 

“Of course,” Teyla replied. “We’ll do everything we can.”

 

John drifted from body to body, memorizing the features of every kid who had died, burying it deep. Those faces would fuel his anger for a long time to come, and if John ever ran across Kolya again, he’d take his fury out in Kolya’s blood.

 

Beckett led the medical team that arrived, and John could see the shock on Beckett’s face as he realized how young some of his patients were. Ronon and Vala strode into the village, looking smugly satisfied.

 

“We cleared out the trash,” Vala announced. “The forest is clear.”

 

“Good work,” John replied. “Beckett is working on the injured. We might need your help to get them transferred back to Atlantis. Ronon, I’m going to need your help with the body.”

 

Ronon nodded. “Got it.”

 

John and Ronon headed for the place where they’d left Cooper’s body. Ronon slung the body over his shoulder with a grunt of effort.

 

“Take the body back to Atlantis,” John said. “I need to check in with Aries and Beckett, but I’ll be right behind you.”

 

Ronon nodded. “Barnes?”

 

John sighed. “He just lost his friend. I’m going to keep him occupied. He’ll do better if he doesn’t have time to think.”

 

By the time John made it back to the village, some kind of order had mostly been restored. The Genii bodies had been piled unceremoniously in a heap, and the kids had been laid out neatly, covered with blankets.

 

Aries greeted John with a nod. “The doctor is taking most of the wounded back to Atlantis.”

 

“We’ll take good care of them,” John promised. “Did they say what they wanted?”

 

“They knew we were your allies,” Aries said. “They said any allies of Atlantis are enemies of the Genii.”

 

John grimaced. “The Genii just declared war.”

 

“If you make war against them, we want to be there,” Aries replied. “Keras did not deserve his death.”

 

John shook his head, thinking of the tiny bodies, as well as Cooper. “None of them did. We’ll let you know what we decide to do.”

 

He sent Teyla back with Beckett and the first group of injured, along with Barnes and the rest of the Marines. John stayed behind, waiting until the last of the injured had been carried through the gate. He wasn’t sure why, but Vala insisted on staying with him.

 

Elizabeth was waiting for them when John walked back through the gate with Vala on his heels. They were the last to return. “Ronon said you killed the Genii.”

 

“We know a few got away, including the man with the pitted face. Petras confirmed that the man he identified as their leader wasn’t among the dead,” John admitted. “There were a lot of Genii, though, and the kids had to lead them away from the gate to give Petras a chance to get through.”

 

“Final count?” Elizabeth asked.

 

“Thirty-three,” John replied. “Five kids died, including Keras. We lost Cooper, and Kim was injured.”

 

“Carson said she’s going to be fine,” Elizabeth said.

 

Daniel entered the control room at a run. “Vala! Are you okay?”

 

“I’m fine, Daniel,” she replied. “Not a scratch on me.”

 

“ _Tell me_ the next time you’re going on a mission,” Daniel insisted. “I might not be able to stop you, but I’d like to know.”

 

Vala smiled, put her hands on either side of Daniel’s face, and pulled him in for an intense kiss.

 

John glanced at Elizabeth, whose eyebrows had gone up, but she made no comment. “Get yourself checked out,” she said. “We’ll debrief tomorrow.”

 

The infirmary was packed when John entered. Ronon hopped off a bed as Lam finished with his exam, and Lam waved John over. “All the injured kids are stable,” she said before he could ask. “But we need the beds, so I’m going to get you out of here as quickly as possible. Anything you want to tell me?”

 

“I’m fine,” John replied. “How is Barnes?”

 

Lam sighed. “I set him up to see Heightmeyer tomorrow. He’s in shock, but you did good to keep him busy.”

 

“I’ve been there,” John admitted. “As soon as Heightmeyer clears him, I’ll put him back on the rotation.”

 

John headed for his quarters as soon as he was released from the infirmary. He stripped his clothing off and left his uniform in a pile on the floor. With a thought, the water was as hot as John could stand, and he let the spray hit sore, tense muscles.

 

He braced himself against the wall of the shower, trying to throttle back his anger, knowing it wouldn’t do any good to break his fist against the wall. When he emerged from the bathroom, he found Rodney sitting on his bed.

 

“What are you doing here, McKay?” John asked wearily.

 

“I heard what happened,” he replied, setting his tablet aside.

 

John ran a hand through his hair. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

 

“Did I ask you to?” Rodney demanded. “I just wanted to tell you that I was sorry.”

 

John’s shoulders slumped. “Thanks.”

 

“I brought that ale you like,” Rodney said. “And sandwiches.”

 

“If I start drinking, I probably won’t stop,” John admitted roughly.

 

“Lorne is on duty,” Rodney said. “And you won’t be drinking it alone.”

 

Blowing off some steam sounded pretty damn good right now, and John nodded. “Okay. Thanks.”

 

Rodney smiled. “Anytime, John.”

 

~~~~~

 

Teyla had seen death before, but not like this. She couldn’t believe that anyone—even the Genii—would attack children. It was a terrible crime.

 

She ran into Rodney in the mess while he was putting together a plate of sandwiches. “It’s for John,” he explained, sounding a little defensive.

 

“John could use a friend right now,” Teyla replied.

 

“So I hear,” Rodney said grimly. “John liked Keras a lot.”

 

“He was an ally, and John felt responsible for him,” Teyla replied. “Just as he feels responsible for Private Cooper.”

 

“And it’s the Genii,” Rodney added darkly. “I’m going to suggest sending a nuke through the gate.”

 

At the moment, Teyla didn’t have a problem with that plan. “We have a staff meeting tomorrow. You could bring it up then.”

 

“Don’t think I won’t,” Rodney replied. “I should get going. I’ll make sure John makes it to the meeting on time and sober.”

 

Teyla looked around the mess hall, locating Lorne and Laro sitting together. Laro seemed to sense her gaze, because he waved her over.

 

“I heard it was bad,” Lorne said quietly as Teyla took the seat next to Laro.

 

Teyla sighed. “It was very bad.”

 

Laro put an arm around her shoulders. “I had not believed the Genii capable of such an atrocity.”

 

“Neither had I.” Teyla took a deep breath. “A child’s death is always a tragedy.”

 

She caught the look that Lorne and Laro exchanged. “Why don’t you spend the evening with us?” Lorne asked. “I’m on call tonight, but I was going to introduce Laro to the delights of American television.”

 

“I don’t want to intrude,” Teyla protested.

 

“Dr. Zelenka was going to join us as well,” Laro replied. “And you shouldn’t be alone. I’ll make tea.”

 

“That sounds wonderful,” Teyla admitted.

 

Ronon approached and sat down next to her. “Hey.”

 

Laro glanced at Lorne, and then said, “Ronon, you would be welcome to join us as well.”

 

“Doing what?”

 

“Watching TV,” Lorne replied. “Laro’s making tea, but I’ve got a jug of _ruus_ wine, although I’m on duty. Zelenka was going to talk the cooks into giving him cake.”

 

Ronon grinned. “Cake sounds good.”

 

“We’ll use the rec room on my floor,” Lorne said. “There’s more room there.”

 

One of the things that Teyla had missed most about being among her people was the closeness. The two weeks that she’d spent on the mainland had only reminded her of what she’d given up by choosing Atlantis. She didn’t regret that choice, but there were times when she missed sitting around the cook fire with Halling and anyone else who cared to join them.

 

Having Laro in the city helped, as he was technically a distant relation through her mother’s line, and Teyla had known him her entire life. He was a solitary man, but he was also a restful person to be around.

 

Teyla accepted the cup of tea from Laro when they sat down in the rec room. “This is one of your mugs,” she murmured.

 

“It is,” he agreed. The others had not yet joined them, and Teyla wrapped her hands around the warm clay. “I find I do not feel at home unless I have my own pot and mugs.”

 

“And you feel at home on Atlantis?” Teyla asked.

 

Laro smiled. “More so than I had hoped, cousin.”

 

“You and Major Lorne are well-matched,” Teyla observed.

 

His smile broadened. “I had not dared hope for such a friend.”

 

“You have family here, too,” Teyla replied, reaching out to put a hand on Laro’s forearm.

 

Laro pressed a kiss to Teyla’s forehead. “You remain our people’s best hope, Teyla.”

 

She let him pull her close and felt the comfort of a brother’s touch. Teyla was still leaning against his shoulder when Lorne and Zelenka joined them. Lorne sat next to Laro, and shyly took his hand, causing Teyla to smile. Zelenka took one of the chairs, while Ronon sprawled on a cushion on the floor.

 

Teyla had no idea what Lorne had chosen to watch, but she didn’t think it mattered. It offered a respite from her thoughts, from the memories of dead children and fallen soldiers, and she had Laro’s arm as a warm, heavy weight around her shoulders, and the murmur of voices around her.

 

Teyla leaned her head against Laro’s shoulder and closed her eyes, hoping that she wouldn’t have nightmares.

 

~~~~~

 

“Did you know him well?”

 

It was late, but Evan was technically still on duty, and he needed to be available to take calls from operations. Laro didn’t seem to inclined to leave, and Evan was grateful for his company. Right now, Evan was sprawled across his bed, his head in Laro’s lap, feeling Laro’s strong fingers massaging his scalp.

 

Evan didn’t have to ask for any clarifications; he knew what Laro was referring to. “Not really. He hadn’t been on Atlantis that long, and the officers don’t mix with the enlisted men all that much.”

 

Laro was quiet for a long moment. “How do you remember your dead, Evan?”

 

Evan closed his eyes. “It depends. Some people get drunk. Some tell stories, or put up stones or plaques.” He sighed. “When my grandfather died, the whole family gathered. The adults drank, and told stories. There were a lot of tears, but a lot of laughter, too. It probably helped that he’d been really sick before his death.”

 

“We sing,” Laro said softly. “It’s rare that we have a body to bury, but when one of my people dies of natural causes, we gather and sing over the body.”

 

Evan smiled. “What about those who die in battle?”

 

Laro trailed his fingers down Evan’s face. “I would sing the funeral song for you, but you would be grateful to be dead and beyond the sound of my voice.”

 

“I can’t imagine that,” Evan replied quietly, seizing Laro’s hand.

 

“You haven’t heard me sing,” Laro said wryly. “Teyla has the better voice.”

 

“I heard her sing at Charin’s funeral,” Evan admitted. “Her voice is beautiful.”

 

The silence that hung between them was comfortable, even easy. Evan still couldn’t quite believe that he had this, that it was sanctioned, that he didn’t have to fear discovery. He couldn’t believe that he could introduce Laro as his boyfriend without fear.

 

“I haven’t seen Teyla so shaken since her father’s death,” Laro admitted after a time.

 

“You’ve known her a long time,” Evan observed.

 

Laro sighed. “We are blood relations through her mother and my father. I have known her since we were children together.”

 

“But you weren’t close,” Evan said.

 

Laro rubbed his thumb over Evan’s knuckles. “I lost my parents when I was old enough to be on my own, but not so young that I was automatically absorbed into another family group.”

 

“You aren’t alone now,” Evan insisted.

 

“Ah, Evan,” Laro murmured. “You are too good to me.”

 

“Not good enough, I’m afraid,” Evan admitted. “I don’t want to let you go.”

 

“Then don’t,” Laro said softly. “I will stay here as long as I am welcome.”

 

Evan smiled. “Good. I have to keep my radio on, but stay with me?”

 

“I thought you’d never ask.” Laro slid down to lie beside Evan, and Evan loved the way their bodies fit together, Laro’s strong arm around Evan’s shoulders, their heads side by side on Evan’s pillow, Laro’s hand threading through Evan’s hair.

 

With his luck, Evan knew he’d get a call before the night was out, but he couldn’t blame Sheppard for needing a night off.

 

“Sleep,” Laro said. “You will need your rest.”

 

“Don’t I know it,” Evan replied before he drifted off.

 

Evan was awakened by an insistent voice in his ear just a few hours later. “Yeah?”

 

“Sorry to disturb you, Major Lorne, but we’ve got a situation.”

 

Evan recognized Sergeant Ramos’ voice immediately. “I’m here. What have you got?”

 

“Disturbance near the north pier, sir,” Ramos replied promptly. “The reports I’ve received indicate a fist fight. Nobody’s been able to break it up so far. I called security, but they said a superior officer might calm things down.”

 

“I’m on my way,” Evan said, disentangling himself from Laro.

 

“Do you need help?” Laro asked sleepily.

 

Evan gave him a quick kiss. “No, but thanks. Hopefully, I’ll be back soon. Stay as long as you like.”

 

Laro smiled. “That will be a long time.”

 

Evan headed for the north pier at a fast jog, a little surprised when Ronon joined him in the hallway outside the transporter on the pier. “Did Ramos call you?” Evan asked.

 

Ronon shrugged. “I knew Sheppard would be getting drunk. Thought I’d help.”

 

“It’s appreciated,” Evan replied.

 

When they neared the cause of the disturbance, Evan wasn’t surprised to see Barnes at the center of it. Sheppard’s brief report had indicated that Barnes had been seriously upset by Cooper’s death.

 

“No!” Barnes shouted. “You’re lying! You have to be!”

 

“What’s your problem?” Dawson demanded, tears in her eyes. “It’s not like it’s your kid!”

 

“Back off, Barnes!” Johnson shouted, backing Barnes up against the wall. “It’s none of your damn business if Coop was the father.”

 

Evan bit back a groan. That was more information than he really wanted, and the repercussions were going to be far-reaching and messy. “Enough!” Evan barked in his most authoritative voice.

 

Everyone in the corridor snapped to attention, which was gratifying, but ultimately unhelpful.

 

“What’s going on here?” Evan demanded.

 

Barnes stared at the floor, looking sullen, but Dawson said, “I’m sorry, sir. It was just a disagreement.”

 

Evan knew about Barnes’ history. “What did Dr. Weir and Colonel Sheppard tell you about brawling in the halls?”

 

Barnes’ face was tight with tension. “Sorry, Major.”

 

“Not good enough,” Evan replied. “You might have just lost your friend, but that doesn’t give you the license to act like an asshole. Report to Ronon tomorrow morning at 0800. You’re at his disposal for the morning, and Colonel Sheppard will decide where you’re going to spend your afternoon.”

 

Barnes nodded. “Yes, sir.”

 

Evan looked around at the others arrayed in the hallway. “Go back to your quarters, and get some sleep,” he ordered. “Dawson, a word.”

 

Ronon said, “I’ll see Barnes back.”

 

“Thanks, Ronon,” Evan replied. He waited until he was alone with Dawson in the hallway. “Do you want to talk about it, Rosie?”

 

At the use of her first name, Dawson’s face crumpled.

 

“Oh, hell,” Evan said under his breath and put an arm around her shoulders. “Okay, let’s find some place a little more private.”

 

He led her to the nearest transporter, intent on getting to the same rec room he’d been in earlier. She was still crying when the door slid closed behind them, tears dripping down rounded cheeks, sniffling but not sobbing. Evan felt a little out of his depth, but he did for her what he’d have done for his sister—he put an arm around her shoulders and let her sob against his chest.

 

When she’d finally calmed down, she pulled back abruptly, wiping her flaming cheeks. “I’m so sorry, sir. That was really inappropriate.”

 

“You needed a friend,” Evan said gently. “And I don’t mind. Is Cooper the father?”

 

She nodded miserably. “At first it was just for fun, but it had started to get serious before—” Dawson gulped. “Before.”

 

“What happened with Barnes?” Evan probed.

 

“He overheard me talking to Johnson,” she admitted. “I work with Johnson in the kitchen, you know.” Evan nodded, and she continued, “He’d noticed that I was really upset, and he knew about me and Coop, and then Barnes just went nuts.”

 

Evan sighed. “Do you want to press charges?”

 

Dawson’s eyes went wide. “No, sir! It’s just—Coop was his best friend, and he feels guilty, and knowing…” She trailed off, glancing down at her still-flat midsection. “Guess I can’t get sent home for this now, sir.”

 

“I’m afraid that’s not a possibility,” Evan confirmed. “Have you talked to the doctor?”

 

She nodded. “Dr. Beckett told me this morning. I was—I was going to tell Coop tonight. I wanted him to be the first to know.”

 

“I’m going to have to talk to Colonel Sheppard about this,” Evan said quietly. “You know that.”

 

She nodded miserably. “I’m sorry, sir.”

 

“Don’t be sorry,” he replied gently. “We’re going to get you through this.”

 

Dawson nodded, her eyes filling with tears again. “Yes, sir. I just—hormones.”

 

Evan smiled. “My sister has two kids, so I know what you mean.”

 

She laughed shakily. “Thank you, sir. I’m sorry I unloaded this on you, but—” Dawson stopped, biting her lip.

 

Evan’s mouth twisted into a wry grin, thinking that being outed had some benefit after all, although this wasn’t what he’d expected. “I’m safe?”

 

Dawson shrugged uncomfortably.

 

“Why don’t you go get some sleep?” he suggested. “I’ll talk to the colonel and Dr. Weir, and then we’ll all discuss it.”

 

She nodded. “Yes, sir.”

 

Evan blew out a breath once she’d left, rubbing his eyes. “Wow, this is a mess,” he muttered. Every time they thought they had a handle on things, somebody threw a wrench into the works. Normally, a pregnancy would result in a one-way trip home, although Evan didn’t know of anyone on Atlantis who had faced that problem. There had been a couple of women at the SGC who had been moved off gate teams when they got pregnant, but they’d always had the option of coming back.

 

And now, they’d have to create and implement policies for dealing with pregnant servicewomen. At least Dawson wasn’t on a gate team, so they didn’t have to worry about her being on the front lines.

 

And yet, this _was_ Atlantis. The whole Pegasus galaxy was the front lines.

 

Evan sighed and put in a call to Dr. Weir. “Sorry to bother you, ma’am, but it seems we have a situation.”

 

“Of course we do,” she said with a sigh. “Do I need to wake Colonel Sheppard?”

 

Evan thought longingly of his own bed, where Laro was probably still sleeping. “No, I don’t think so. I just broke up a fight between Barnes and Dawson.”

 

“Corporal Rose Dawson?” Elizabeth asked. “From the kitchen staff?”

 

“Yes, ma’am. She’s apparently pregnant.”

 

“I see.” Weir groaned. “I’ll let John know that we need to meet before the staff meeting tomorrow. I’d like to think about how we’re going to handle this.”

 

“Yes, ma’am,” Evan said with relief. “I’ll see you at 0800, then?”

 

“That sounds perfect,” Elizabeth replied.

 

Evan went back to his quarters, smiling when he saw Laro still sprawled in his bed. Evan quickly stripped off his uniform and slid in next to Laro, who wrapped an arm around Evan’s waist.

 

He could get used to this.

 

~~~~~

 

Elizabeth slid into her seat at the head of the conference table early the next morning, having spent a sleepless night trying to decide how to handle Corporal Dawson—and by extension, every member of the expedition team who got pregnant in the future.

 

She honestly had no idea what might be the better option—whether to deal with these problems as they came up, or to overhaul the entire system now.

 

She sipped her tea and took a deep breath, smiling at Cam when he entered. “Early meeting, huh?” he asked.

 

“We have a situation,” Elizabeth admitted. “I wanted everybody here for this.”

 

Cam poured a cup of coffee and slid into the seat next to her. “Should I be worried?”

 

“I have no idea.”

 

Lorne was the next to arrive, and he sat next to Cam with his own cup of coffee, looking about as tired as Elizabeth felt. Sam and Daniel showed up soon after. Both of them had their hands wrapped around steaming mugs, and they were blinking sleepily.

 

“We’re just waiting on Colonel Sheppard and Rodney,” Elizabeth said.

 

Rodney and John wandered in fifteen minutes late. Rodney’s mouth was drawn in a thin line, and John looked rumpled and weary. John collapsed into the chair next to Elizabeth, and Rodney filled two mugs of coffee and handed one to John when he sat down.

 

“Why the earlier meeting?” John asked, with a grateful look at Rodney.

 

Elizabeth looked at Lorne. “Do you want to start, Major?”

 

“We had a little trouble with Barnes last night,” Lorne began. “There was an altercation with him and Corporal Dawson, and I was called in. During the course of events, Dawson let it slip that she’s pregnant.”

 

John stiffened. “Who’s the father?”

 

“Cooper.”

 

“Shit.” John’s curse echoed around the table, and he turned to look at Elizabeth. “How are we going to handle this?”

 

“I don’t know,” she admitted. “The expedition isn’t set up to handle children, but I think that has to change. If we’re out here long-term…” She shrugged. “People _will_ form relationships.”

 

Sam’s mouth twisted into a rueful grin. “Not to mention that if we’re ever successful in bringing people from Earth, we’ll probably end up with children on Atlantis.”

 

Cam leaned back in his chair, looking thoughtful. “We _are_ a colony. What’s Dawson’s designation?”

 

“She’s one of our better cooks,” Elizabeth replied.

 

“Then she’s off the front lines anyway,” Cam said reasonably.

 

John sighed. “And what about the next soldier who gets pregnant and is on a gate team?”

 

“Why not just move her into a support position for the duration of her pregnancy, and then let her make the decision whether to go into the field?” Sam asked reasonably. “Look, everybody on this city has a dangerous job. We can discourage people from having kids, but that doesn’t mean it’s not going to happen.”

 

“Why should we discourage people from having children?” Daniel demanded abruptly. When all eyes in the room turned towards him, he shrugged. “What?”

 

“Why wouldn’t we discourage our people from having children?” Elizabeth asked, keeping a tight rein on her temper. All she could think about was the disaster a dead child would represent. All it would take was one misstep with Ancient technology, or one successful attack by the Wraith or the Genii, and they would have a dead kid.

 

A child who had not volunteered for this mission, who was completely innocent. Elizabeth wasn’t sure she could stomach the thought, especially given as much death and destruction she’d seen in her work for the UN.

 

War exacted a terrible price.

 

The room had fallen completely silent in response to her question, and Elizabeth stared at Daniel. She knew his reputation; he didn’t pull his punches, and he was smart—a genius, even—at least where it concerned ancient civilizations and languages.

 

Daniel took a sip of coffee. “Look, I was there when we first formulated this plan, and I know Jack, probably better than anyone else here—other than Sam.”

 

Sam grimaced but didn’t say anything.

 

“Go on,” John said evenly.

 

Daniel cleared his throat. “Jack wouldn’t have activated Operation Phoenix if there had been a chance to save Earth. I’m not saying we won’t retake it eventually, but it might not be in the next five years, or the next ten. It might not even be within our generation.”

 

Elizabeth see the impact of that statement hit everyone in the room. Lorne paled and stared down at the table. Cam’s good hand clenched into a tight fist.  Sam seemed to fold in on herself, and Elizabeth was almost certain she saw Rodney’s hand find John’s leg under the table.

 

“So?” John finally asked. “Spell it out for us non-genuises, Jackson.”

 

“Civilizations that don’t reproduce don’t survive,” Daniel replied. “I’m not saying that there aren’t other ways to spread our knowledge, but if we _are_ going to retake Earth, we’re going to need gene carriers. We’re going to need a continuation of those genes, and knowledge, and people who can continue our fight if we’re not successful.”

 

Elizabeth blinked. “You’re suggesting that we encourage gene carriers to reproduce.”

 

She did _not_ look at either John or Lorne, who probably had the strongest natural genes on the city, and who were both gay. There would be no unplanned pregnancies with either of them.

 

“I’m not saying anything of the sort,” Daniel insisted. “I’m saying that we make it possible for those who choose to reproduce to raise their children in a supportive environment. How we deal with Corporal Dawson now may affect our viability as a colony in the future.”

 

Elizabeth wasn’t ready to agree wholeheartedly, but she was willing to listen. “What would you suggest we do?”

 

“Talk to Teyla and some of the other Athosians,” Daniel urged. “Find out how they form family groups, see if there’s an opportunity to learn from, and possibly emulate, them. Create procedures that make it easier for women to report pregnancies and continue their duties as long as they can. We can learn from the cultures in this galaxy. They’ve all dealt with the menace of the Wraith and other dangers longer than we have.”

 

Elizabeth smiled. “Those all sound like good ideas, Dr. Jackson. Consider yourself in charge.”

 

Daniel froze. “Um, excuse me?”

 

Both Cam and Sam smirked unrestrainedly. “You did ask for it, Jackson,” Cam pointed out.

 

Sam chuckled. “He’s right. You pretty much nominated yourself.”

 

“There are plenty of necessary non-combat roles for those who choose that route,” Elizabeth pointed out. “And we can take steps to prepare safe areas of the city for children.”

 

“I’ll put my people on that,” Rodney offered.

 

John sighed. “We can also encourage people to form family groups like the Athosians do, even if they’re not on gate teams, and we can suggest that our people change quarters accordingly, although that’s going to be easier if we can open up sections of the city that allow for those groupings.”

 

“I’ve got a team going out this morning to survey other areas of the city,” Rodney asserted. “None of them with the ATA gene. Those in the science department who can be considered responsible will go out after them and make sure all the dangerous Ancient tech is cleared.”

 

Daniel hesitated and asked, “Is Vala on one of those teams?”

 

Rodney nodded. “She wanted to go.”

 

“Well, she wanted to go fight off the Genii, too,” Daniel muttered, but he didn’t offer any other arguments.

 

“Speaking of, we have people coming in here to address exactly that,” Elizabeth said. “Rodney, I think you’re leading that meeting.”

 

Rodney nodded. “Yes, but I’m going to need food.”

 

“I’ll get something,” John replied, patting Rodney on the shoulder. “I wanted to be here anyway.”

 

Rodney smiled at John. “Thank you, John.”

 

“No big deal, buddy,” John said, nodding at Elizabeth before he disappeared.

 

The others filtered out of the room one by one, other than Rodney and Daniel. “I’m sorry,” Daniel said eventually, when it was just the three of them.

 

“Sorry for what?” Rodney demanded peevishly. “For speaking the truth?”

 

“It’s not something they were ready for,” Daniel said.

 

Rodney snorted. “Let’s face it. We’re going to be dealing with a lot of things we’re not entirely ready for. Besides, they should have already known that by now. We don’t have the resources to retake Earth. Atlantis was never meant to be a staging ground.”

 

Elizabeth sighed. “No, it wasn’t.”

 

“It _really_ wasn’t,” Rodney agreed peevishly. “We’re going to be too busy surviving the Wraith to worry about Earth.”

 

“I’m pretty sure that was the point,” Daniel said. “Jack knew he could send personnel here without worrying that we’d be followed.”

 

“ _Because we’d be too busy not getting eaten_ ,” Rodney snapped, emphasizing every word. “Come on, Jackson. You know that.”

 

“Which is why I suggested that reproduction isn’t a bad idea,” Daniel replied mildly, in exactly the tone of voice that was guaranteed to rile Rodney.

 

Rodney snorted. “And then the Wraith can eat babies, as if we needed additional proof that we should kill them all.”

 

“Carson is still working on the retrovirus,” Elizabeth replied with equanimity. “Let’s deal with one thing at a time. Right now, we need to address our shortage of available space on Atlantis, as well as the issue with the Genii.”

 

Rodney nodded decisively. “I’m already working on both problems. The space shortage is fairly easily taken care of, but the Genii are going to be more of a problem.”

 

“Aren’t they always?” Elizabeth muttered.

 

The rest of the group began to filter in, including Vala, who plopped down in a vacant seat next to Daniel. Even though Daniel technically didn’t need to stay, Vala’s touch kept him in his chair. John appeared moments before Elizabeth was due to start the meeting with a plate of food for Rodney.

 

“Now that we’re all here, let’s get started,” Elizabeth said as soon as John had taken a seat. “We need more space on the city, and we’re making a concentrated effort to map out the areas not already in use.”


	5. Gathering Intelligence

_“Granted, I’m the expert in ancient human civilizations, so I guess it would make sense that I might have some insights into creating a_ new _civilization. Between figuring out what the new rules should be and decrypting the Ancient database, I certainly had my hands full. And since I was the one with the best grasp of the language and the logic, I was about the only person making heads or tails of the information. That might explain why it took me so long to find the information that would end up being most useful.”_

 

~Interview with Daniel Jackson

 

Sam slid into a seat in the conference room next to McKay, who was typing away on his laptop in between sips of coffee. Sam was used to meetings; there had been plenty of them at the SGC—briefings, debriefings, strategy meetings, meetings about safety protocols—but she wasn’t sure she’d ever get used to the new détente between her and McKay.

 

When Sam had first arrived on Atlantis, after being cleared for duty by Dr. Beckett, she’d gone to see McKay, hoping to be put to work, even though she’d dreaded their interaction. She’d expected McKay to hit on her, or say something inappropriate, but instead he’d thrown his hands up in the air and said, “Oh, thank God. Finally, someone I can trust to be competent.”

 

And with that McKay had foisted about six projects off on her with a brusque, “And when you finish those, come back for more.”

 

There had been far too much to do over the next few days for Sam to do much more than work, visit Cam in the infirmary, and sleep. She might have forgotten to eat, except that Vala had seemed to take the well being of the entire team to heart.

 

Sam had almost begun to believe that she and McKay could coexist peaceably when he’d cornered her in the lab she’d been using.

 

_“Colonel Carter? Could I speak with you?”_

_Sam could find nothing to fault in his tone, which was tentative and perfectly respectful. Still, she was waiting for the moment when McKay made some inappropriate comment, or made his interest in her known, which was just going to make things that much more awkward._

_She knew he’d changed, but she wasn’t yet sure how much._

_Sam turned slowly and braced herself. “Yes?”_

_“I don’t want this to be awkward,” Rodney blurted out._

_Sam blinked, a little surprised. “What?”_

_“It’s not that I don’t still think you’re attractive,” Rodney said hurriedly. “Because I do. Obviously.”_

_Sam held her tongue with some effort. She couldn’t deal with McKay’s interest right now, not on top of her worry and grief._

_“It’s just—there’s someone else. At least, I’m hoping there’s someone else. I just have to convince hi—this person,” Rodney explained, correcting himself in mid-word. “And I don’t want h—_ this person— _to get the wrong impression.”_

_After a moment, Sam realized that McKay was asking her to forget he’d ever come onto her, so as not to ruin his chance with whomever he was interested in now. He looked so earnest, it was—God help her—endearing. She remembered all too well going to Jack after the whole mess with Pete and how it had felt to see Kerry walk out of Jack’s house just as she worked up the nerve to tell him how she felt._

_Sam wouldn’t wish that kind of embarrassment—praying for the ground to open up and swallow her whole—on her worst enemy. Well, maybe Ba’al, but not McKay._

_“Consider it forgotten,” Sam said immediately._

_McKay’s shoulders slumped in relief. “Thank you.” Then, he straightened, his chin tilted defiantly. “I know we’ve had our differences, but I hope we can work together.”_

_“I’ll do my best if you will,” Sam promised._

_“Thank you,” Rodney replied. “I could use at least one more person around who’s as smart as I am.”_

That had been a high compliment coming from McKay. Really, if she’d given any consideration to the fact that she’d have to work _for_ McKay on Atlantis, she might have talked the others into going back to Earth, even if it meant certain death. Now that she’d had the opportunity to work with him, though, Sam could recognize the changes. He’d formed close relationships with his team, and when the people on Atlantis talked about him, it was with irritation mixed with awe.

 

No matter how arrogant McKay might be—and he could be _very_ arrogant—he’d also earned his place on Atlantis. Sam couldn’t hope to touch McKay’s legend as CSO of Atlantis, procurer of miracles.

 

Really, she didn’t want to supplant him, and she liked the rest of the science staff quite a bit, especially Zelenka, who tended not to take McKay’s demands and attitude seriously, instead muttering in Czech anytime McKay got too outrageous.

 

She probably should make some effort to learn the language, just for the entertainment value.

 

“Look,” McKay said suddenly, startling Sam out of her thoughts. “How do you want to divide up the time?”

 

Sam frowned. “What time?”

 

“Zelenka is getting his own department, and I’m letting him choose his alternate, as well as how they’re going to split their duties,” McKay said. “I’m asking how you want to do this. We could do half a day on and half off, but I doubt either of us wants to switch over to a completely nocturnal schedule.”

 

“No, not really,” Sam agreed, surprised that McKay had figured that out on his own. “Do you have a suggestion?”

 

“We work regular hours, and go one week on, one week off on call for the rest of the time,” McKay replied.

 

That actually seemed like a good plan, and Sam said as much.

 

McKay shrugged. “It gives us both a week off when necessary.” He smiled wryly. “I promise not to interfere more than I can help.”

 

Sam found herself returning the smile. “Thank you, Rodney.” Some mischievous impulse caused her to ask, “How have you been doing convincing that person of your interest?”

 

McKay flushed slightly. “I think I’m making progress. Thanks for asking.”

 

Sam smiled, although she felt a pang for the loss of what she’d been building with Jack. Whatever she might have said in response was interrupted by Zelenka’s entrance. He was muttering under his breath in Czech, and he sat down next to Sam with a nod.

 

After Zelenka, other members of the science department filtered in. Simpson, Kusanagi, Parrish, Beckett, Raman, and Daniel showed up shortly thereafter.

 

“You’ve all heard the news,” McKay said, calling everyone to order in his own abrupt fashion. “Dr. Carter is going to be my alternate. We’ll be going one week on and one week off during off-duty hours.” McKay’s mouth twitched up into a smile. “Just think of us as your parents, children. And if you try to play one of us against the other, we will hurt you. Or, rather, I’m sure Dr. Carter will. I’ll just make your life hell. Dr. Jackson is in charge of the soft sciences, as we discussed; Dr. Zelenka is now in charge of engineering. That means if you bring any problems involving those two departments to me without going through them first—I’m going to be very unhappy.”

 

Smiles all around the table at that, including from Sam. “Radek, who’s your second?” McKay asked. “I’m giving you first choice, so feel honored.”

 

Zelenka smiled. “Esposito.”

 

“Bastard,” McKay complained good-naturedly. “Fine. Jackson?”

 

“Dr. Corrigan,” Daniel said.

 

McKay nodded shortly. “Very good. Parrish, do you have a second?”

 

Parrish stuttered for a moment. “Uh, I suppose Dr. Brown.”

 

“Very well. I’m going to suggest you adopt the same schedule as Dr. Carter and I have, but I won’t insist on it. Work it out among yourselves, just let us know and stick to it,” McKay said. “We’re also revising our lists of those scientists willing to go off-world. Those of you who have not qualified to carry a gun yet are required to do so immediately, whether you leave the city or not. I don’t want any excuses. We’re here, we’re alone, and you don’t know when you’re going to run up against a Wraith.”

 

There were grumblings, but no one protested. Sam was a little surprised that there were scientists who hadn’t qualified on firearms yet, but she probably shouldn’t be. Plenty of scientists who came to Atlantis could count on never leaving the city; there was enough here to keep them busy.

 

“Good,” McKay said brightly. “That being decided, let’s hear reports from the last week.”

 

Daniel, Zelenka, and Sam were the only ones who avoided McKay’s eyes. “I can go ahead,” Daniel said with a shrug.

 

“Dr. Jackson,” McKay said graciously.

 

Daniel reported on his efforts to clarify the Ancient index, as well as his attempts to sort through the data collected over the last two years.

 

“Thank you, Dr. Jackson,” McKay said. “Dr. Zelenka?”

 

“I have been working to open additional areas of the city now that we have more power,” Zelenka began. “We have need of additional quarters, as you know.”

 

From Zelenka’s report, it was obvious that he was moving as quickly as he could, but it was a slow process. “We have to clear every room, every lab,” Zelenka insisted. “Every time we clear a section, I give an updated list to Sergeant Stackhouse.”

 

“Very good,” McKay said approvingly. “And the rest of the structural issues?”

 

“I will ensure you have an up-to-date report.”

 

McKay nodded. “Thank you. Parrish? How is botany doing with the list of requests?”

 

Sam paid attention with some effort; she kept thinking about Cam, about Vala, about Jack and Teal’c. She was distracted, but she couldn’t seem to help it. She couldn’t keep her mind on what was going on.

 

She wondered if she’d ever be able to focus completely on the task at hand; she hoped so. She would hate to always have half her brain on Earth.

 

Sam knew she was going to need all her faculties on Atlantis.

 

~~~~~

 

Master Bra’tac had been as good as his word. The _tel’tak_ was in good repair and well equipped, with a good amount of supplies they’d need for the trip to Atlantis. Bra’tac had also provided a list of planets that would be safe enough to visit—and by safe enough, he meant that the Ori hadn’t gained a foothold yet, and the Goa’uld didn’t have a presence there.

 

Of course, that didn’t mean the Lucian Alliance wasn’t active, or that they wouldn’t run into other sorts of trouble.

 

Teal’c had agreed to accompany them to the first planet with a cache of supplies and a naquadah generator. Jack had deemed it prudent to donate a generator to the Free Jaffa, just in case Teal’c needed to contact Atlantis a little faster than a ship could fly. That would mean one less cache for the SGC teams to access, but Jack hoped they’d have been and gone by now, if they were going to use it.

 

They had expected a planet with a small but friendly community of farmers; what they got was something else altogether.

 

When Jack landed the ship—he’d insisted on flying—no one came to greet them. Teal’c frowned at the lack of welcome. “Someone should have met us here.”

 

Jack nodded. “We’ll go cautiously, then. Jon, you take point.”

 

He was trying to treat Jon as any other member of the team, trying not to feel resentment as Jon moved so easily, without any of Jack’s old injuries. The clone had almost all of Jack’s memories and the body of an eighteen-year-old.

 

Jack envied his clone more than anything else.

 

Even Cassie had her zat out and ready as they approached the nearest village; Jon had both a shotgun and a Glock that he’d brought along with him, in addition to the zat hanging from his belt. Teal’c had his staff weapon, and Jack had a service weapon and a zat.

 

He hoped the cache was intact; they’d find weapons and ammunition there.

 

But they needed to check the village first. The smell hit them long before they reached the first set of houses. Jack covered his mouth and nose with his jacket, and Jon and Cassie followed suit. Teal’c appeared unmoved, although Jack thought he might have gone just a little pale.

 

The sight that greeted them was familiar, but terrible all the same. The bodies were scattered like broken dolls. A few showed signs of violence, but most were unmarked if partially decomposed.

 

“What the hell?” Jon asked.

 

Teal’c shook his head. “I believe this is the work of the Ori.”

 

“Okay, seriously, _what the fuck_?” Jon demands, pointing at the bodies of three young children. Cassie was pale, and a little green, but her expression was resolute.

 

“This is the work of the Ori,” Teal’c intoned. “It can be no one else.”

 

“I’d believe it,” Jack replied. “Let’s see what we can salvage.”

 

Jack didn’t think they’d be able to salvage much. Most of the food had been ill preserved and was therefore spoiled, and there was little in the way of clothing or tools that these people could offer. He tried not to look at the smallest bodies, instead focusing only on the task at hand.

 

“O’Neill!” Teal’c shouted, and there was something in Teal’c’s voice that told Jack he wasn’t going to like what Teal’c had to show him.

 

Teal’c was inside one of the small houses, and Jack stuck his head in, swearing as he saw what had alerted Teal’c—five bodies wearing Tau’ri uniforms and carrying P-90s.

 

“Fuck,” Jack murmured. He approached the bodies slowly, reading the names on the fronts of their uniforms. “Satterfield, Brunson, Fielding, Freeman, and Dansk.”

 

Jon stopped just behind Jack, taking it all in with a curse. “What were they doing here?”

 

“Probably trying to get to the cache,” Jack replied, his voice steady and his heart aching. “Maybe they got caught by the Ori, or maybe the Ori were already giving the natives trouble and our people stayed to help. Does it really matter?”

 

“Should we bury them?” Cassie asked, sounding remarkably calm. Jack suspected she’d break down later, but this wasn’t the first planet she’d been to where all the inhabitants had been killed.

 

If Jack remembered correctly, Cassie hadn’t cried much then, either.

 

Jack ran a hand through his hair, considering his options. With everyone here dead—and maybe with the destruction extending to the rest of the planet—Jack didn’t think they had to worry about being surprised.

 

“Burying them is going to take too long,” Jon asserted quietly. “But we can make a funeral pyre.”

 

Teal’c inclined his head. “It’s the way of the Jaffa.”

 

“Jon, T, see what you can do to get it set up,” Jack ordered. “Cassie, you’re with me. We need to see if the cache is still intact.”

 

Jack was silent as he led Cassie out of the village and towards the supply cache. This world should have been safe: it had never been held by the Goa’uld, and it wasn’t well populated or especially rich. It was a backwater world, with very little to offer, and yet the Ori had struck and struck hard.

 

He didn’t like where this was going.

 

The cache was in a cave a few miles from the village, and the weather tight containers were untouched. “They didn’t get into these?” Cassie asked.

 

“Doesn’t look like it,” Jack said. He checked the naquadah generator, and it looked intact, but he couldn’t say for certain. Jack tested the weight, and he knew that he wasn’t going to be able to lift it without straining muscles and still-healing ribs. “We’re going to need Jon and Teal’c for this.”

 

“I’m glad you’re being sensible,” Cassie replied with asperity, sounding very much like Janet in that moment. “We’re going to need the food, though,” she added, putting MREs in the pack she’d brought with her. “And we’re going to need more than what we’ve got here.”

 

“We’ll find what we need,” Jack promised. “We’ve got the generator. It might be easier to hook it up to the gate and dial out to Pegasus.”

 

Cassie frowned. “Do you know how to do that?”

 

Jack winced. “I’ve seen Carter do it before.”

 

She snorted. “Right. Okay, I guess we can give it a shot.”

 

They emptied the boxes of MREs, although Jack was a little worried about teams that might come after them that needed food. Still, if they went through the gate straight to Pegasus, he could have Teal’c put some of the MREs back and return the ship to Bra’tac.

 

Jack trudged back to the village with Cassie in tow, walking in silence. Jack knew he probably should say something to reassure her, but he couldn’t come up with the words.

 

By the time they returned, Jon and Teal’c had managed to gather enough brush and logs to build a large pyre, and they’d made a start at piling the other bodies in one of the larger houses.

 

“We thought we’d burn the house and the bodies,” Teal’c explained.

 

Jack nodded. “Good. Did you get the dog tags?”

 

Jon held them up. “Of course, I did.”

 

Jack smiled. He should have known his clone would follow the proper procedure when it came to disposal of fallen soldiers. “All right, then. Let’s get it done.”

 

He sent Cassie to check for usable supplies in the dwellings Jon and Teal’c had already cleared. She grimaced but didn’t argue, and Jack suspected that while she might not want to be coddled, she was glad not to have this particular job.

 

Jack did his best to pull his own weight, but he still ached all over, and he couldn’t move nearly as quickly as Teal’c and Jon, who seemed able to shift twice as many bodies as Jack. He didn’t think he’d ever get used to his new limitations, especially when he compared his abilities and limitations with Jon’s.

 

Finally, they had moved as many of the bodies as they could find, stacking them up like cordwood in an empty house, and stacking wood around the outside of the dwelling. Jon set it ablaze, and then they moved on to the funeral pyre for the SGC personnel.

 

Cassie looked a little green, but she seemed to be holding together. Teal’c’s expression was grave, and Jon probably looked as grim as Jack felt.

 

Jack cleared his throat, wishing he had something profound to say. “These were brave men and women, who gave their lives in service to our world, and to those in need, without thought of personal sacrifice. We will remember them.”

 

Jon seemed to take that as his cue, because he set the pyre ablaze. Jack stood there, steady on his feet in spite of aching muscles and a terrible exhaustion. He could feel the heat of the fire on his face, and he could smell the awful odor of burning flesh.

 

It was probably a good thing that he was too tired to eat; Jack didn’t think he’d be up for a meal any time soon.

 

“Come on,” Cassie urged him, breaking the silence. “We can sleep on the ship tonight. There’s no point in trying to get the generator hooked up to the gate right now.”

 

There had been a few power bars scattered among the MREs, and Jack ate about half of one before he gave up, unable to stomach the thought of more food.

 

Jon ate two and announced, “I’ll take the first watch. Teal’c, I’ll wake you up in a few hours.”

 

“As you wish,” Teal’c replied, stretching out on the floor of the cargo bay.

 

Jack knew he should argue, that he should insist on taking one watch, but the words seemed stuck in his throat, along with half the power bar.

 

He wondered if this was what waited for them on every planet, if the Ori would leave anyone unscathed as they cut a swathe across the Milky Way. Jack had believed that if he could only escape, he’d find his team and retake Earth, but finding the bodies of the SGC members he’d supposedly sent to safety had knocked him back a step.

 

Maybe this was it—maybe he was looking at the end of life as they’d always known it.

 

Then again, maybe he was just getting old, and he was hurting too badly to think about this logically. Things might look better in the morning.

 

~~~~~

 

Any suspicions Cam had that Elizabeth had asked him to be her alternate just to give him make-work were put to rest within the first couple of days. He mainly focused on the reports Elizabeth had flagged as crucial, including the briefings on the allies and enemies in Pegasus. Cam started with the information on the Genii, since they seemed to present the most pressing problems.

 

“What are we going to do about the Genii?” Cam asked, glancing up from the mission report detailing the coup d’état.

 

“I’ve already put in a call to Ladon Radim,” she responded, her eyes still on her computer screen. “I’m waiting for his response.”

 

“Do you trust him?”

 

Elizabeth stopped what she was doing, leaning back in her chair and giving Cam her full attention. “Let’s just say that I don’t _not_ trust him. As long as our goals and his mesh, he’ll give us his full support, which is not inconsiderable.”

 

“And you want to keep the lines of communication open,” Cam observed.

 

“I prefer diplomacy to blowing people up, although I’m not opposed to the latter when they attack children,” Elizabeth said with a smile and steely determination. “I’ll give Ladon the chance to explain before I send John’s team after him.”

 

Cam winced, reminded that he wouldn’t be going into the field any time soon. “And if his explanation doesn’t make sense?”

 

“Then I imagine John will want to have a long conversation with him.”

 

Cam went back to his mission report, and Elizabeth added, “Cam, I’m sure you’ll be back in the field eventually.”

 

“In some capacity,” Cam muttered.

 

“I’m sorry?”

 

“In some capacity, you mean,” he said a little louder.

 

Elizabeth took a deep, audible breath. “Tell me, Colonel Mitchell. If you were cleared today, would you go back out in the field?”

 

Her tone was just a little sharp, but her eyes were sympathetic, and Cam couldn’t meet her gaze. He stared at the floor, thinking about all the things that could go wrong when he had only one good arm—especially since it wasn’t his dominant hand.

 

“No, I wouldn’t,” he admitted. “I just—I’m sorry.”

 

She was silent until Cam looked up. “Don’t be sorry. You have every reason to be angry. Just don’t let it keep you from doing your job.”

 

And that was a not-so-subtle reminder that Cam’s current job was to serve as an alternate for Elizabeth. He took the quiet rebuke stoically. “Yes, ma’am.”

 

“Don’t call me ma’am,” Elizabeth replied with a smile. “It makes me feel old.”

 

Cam grinned. “You got it.”

 

The gate alarm sounded, and Elizabeth was out of her chair and heading for the gate room immediately, with Cam at her heels.

 

“We have a transmission from Ladon Radim,” Chuck announced. “He says he’s come to talk.”

 

Elizabeth nodded to the Marines who had converged and said, “Drop the shield.”

 

Ladon walked through the gate with his hands up, and he was clearly unarmed. The two guards behind him had their weapons holstered and their hands raised as well.

 

“You’re treading on thin ice, Ladon,” Elizabeth advised him. “So talk fast.”

 

Cam told himself that he was going to get certified using his left hand as quickly as possible, but at least he had one of the zats they’d brought with them.

 

“We don’t know what happened, and I had nothing to do with the attack,” Ladon said immediately, his words holding the ring of sincerity. “But I can take a guess at who might be responsible if you’ll allow me to explain, Dr. Weir.”

 

“I think you should come up to my office,” Elizabeth replied.

 

Cam trailed them up the stairs, wondering how Elizabeth was going to introduce him, and how Ladon would take Cam’s presence.

 

“Ladon, this is Lieutenant Colonel Cameron Mitchell,” Elizabeth said as soon as the door closed behind him. “He’s my alternate. If I’m not available, he speaks for me.”

 

Cam felt a frisson of unease at that, since Elizabeth spoke for the entire city, and the people here trusted her after two years. They didn’t know Cam from Adam.

 

Than again, Ladon didn’t know that.

 

“It’s nice to meet you,” he replied before turning back to Elizabeth. “I don’t mean any offense, but I thought Colonel Sheppard was the other leader.”

 

“He’s still leader,” Elizabeth insisted. “Just of military matters. “Tell me, have you heard?”

 

Ladon nodded. “I sent out a few discreet inquiries when I received your message,” he admitted. “I’m very sorry for their loss, but I believe the responsibility lies entirely with Commander Kolya.”

 

Elizabeth’s narrowed eyes were the only reaction she gave to the mention of Kolya’s name. Cam noticed that she made no mention of their own suspicions. “Why do you say that?”

 

“After Kolya’s failed attempt to take Atlantis, he fell into disfavor,” Ladon explained. “He had intended to carry out his own coup, and he wasn’t pleased that I succeeded where he did not.”

 

Cam wasn’t sure he bought the explanation. He’d read the reports detailing the Genii’s attempt to take Atlantis by force, and he figured attacking a bunch of kids wasn’t beyond Kolya, but Ladon had manipulated Elizabeth and Sheppard in the past.

 

“How do we know you’re not using Kolya as a convenient scapegoat? Or that you didn’t order the attack?” Elizabeth asked, her words echoing Cam’s thoughts.

 

Ladon leaned forward in his chair. “Dr. Weir, I still believe that a partnership with your people is the Genii’s best chance at defeating the Wraith. Even if I did not, however, we’re not in the business of making war on children.”

 

His words rang with sincerity, and Cam wanted to believe him, even though he wasn’t sure which was worse—to be at war with an entire planet, or to have a rogue group of soldiers attacking their allies. At least they knew where to find the Genii homeworld, and they could send a bomb or two through if that’s what it took to stop them.

 

But a madman with a bunch of guns and a vendetta against Atlantis? Cam had no idea how they were going to effectively respond to that threat.

 

“Very well,” Elizabeth finally said with a nod. “I believe you. Do you have any information on Kolya’s current whereabouts or his end goals?”

 

Ladon shook his head. “I don’t know what he wants, but I have some reports on his most recent movements. I can get that to you.”

 

“We would appreciated it, along with any other information you might have on Kolya and his people.” Elizabeth rose from behind her desk. “Thank you for your help, Ladon.”

 

“Just let me know if there’s anything else I can do.”

 

Cam didn’t believe that for a minute. Ladon would assist them only if it was expedient; for now, he would help them, but he couldn’t be trusted.

 

“What do you think?” Elizabeth asked after the gate closed.

 

Cam felt as though he was being tested; he just hoped he wasn’t found wanting. “I think he’ll help as long as it serves his agenda, and not a minute longer. And I think the only reason I believe him is the description we got from Petras.”

 

Elizabeth smiled. “I agree. Once he sends the information, I’d like you to go over it with me. I know you’ve read most of Atlantis’ mission reports.”

 

“I think I’ve been through about 90-percent,” Cam replied.

 

Her eyes went a little wide, and Cam thought it might have been approval in her nod. “You must be a fast reader.”

 

Cam shrugged. “I haven’t had a lot to do.”

 

“Good. I’d like you to keep an eye out for any correlations between our reports and what Ladon sends us,” Elizabeth said. “I’d also like you to talk to Colonel Sheppard, and see if there’s anything we can do to improve our information gathering techniques.”

 

“Are we talking about sending out spies?” Cam asked.

 

Elizabeth shook her head. “Not as such. We don’t have the resources. But we need to stay informed, and we need to warn our allies. Let me know what you and John decide.”

 

Cam recognized that he was being given real responsibility, and he accepted it with a nod. “I’ll do what I can.”

 

“Thank you,” Elizabeth said sincerely. “You don’t know how grateful I am to have the help.”

 

Cam flushed. “I’m just glad I could be of assistance.”

 

And maybe, he thought, this gig wouldn’t be so bad after all.

 

~~~~~

 

Vala had been given a day to recover after the trip to the planet with the children, although she hadn’t needed one. She probably shouldn’t have felt so energized after killing half a dozen people, but she’d missed the rush of adrenalin.

 

And killing the Genii on that planet—bullies, all of them—had brought her a visceral pleasure. Perhaps she could not kill the Jaffa who had harmed her, but if she could kill those who harmed the innocent—well, it was a good day.

 

Besides, Vala was pretty sure that exploring Atlantis wouldn’t be able to give her the same rush, even though she’d been warned multiple times about the risks.

 

Then again, her gene was weak, so she didn’t think she’d be able to turn anything on, and she was prepared to zat anyone who did something stupid.

 

Stackhouse had put her on Zelenka’s team, and he had greeted her with a pleased smile. “I hear many good things about you, Ms. Mal Doran.”

 

“Vala,” she had replied. “Anything else makes me feel old.”

 

Zelenka had grinned widely. “Vala then. You are welcome.”

 

Even if exploring the city wasn’t as exciting as killing bad guys, Vala was happy to have something to do. If she stayed busy, she didn’t have to think.

 

They were exploring the southeast pier today, moving room by room cautiously, and marking off each room as they cleared it.

 

“More quarters,” Zelenka said, poking his head inside. “Jensen, Gold, mark it.”

 

And then they moved on to the next set of doors.

 

Vala thought that this was going to be a very long day.

 

Most of the rooms were just more empty quarters, and those were cleared and marked accordingly.

 

The real excitement came when they found a room that clearly wasn’t quarters, and wasn’t a standard lab, either. It was large, with half a dozen tables that had machines of an unknown sort on them.

 

Zelenka and Miko began bustling around, scanning equipment carefully. “Those of you with the gene, _don’t touch anything_!” Zelenka called.

 

Vala’s gene wasn’t very strong, but she kept her hands behind her back, unwilling to do anything to jeopardize the others’ lives.

 

As far as she knew, Miko was the only true gene carrier on the team, and for good reason. Vala’s gene was weak enough that she didn’t have to worry too much about turning something on inadvertently, but she wasn’t willing to take any chances.

 

“Dr. Zelenka!” Miko called after a thorough investigation of one of the machines. “I believe these might be the Ancient equivalent to sewing machines.”

 

“That is good news,” Zelenka replied with a broad grin.

 

Now that they knew what the machines were for, the crumbling material in the corners of the room made more sense. The Ancients had managed to preserve a lot of things after 10,000 years, but even the best fabric couldn’t last forever.

 

They marked the room and moved on, but that was the most exciting find of the day. The rest of the rooms were larger quarters, and they marked each room and moved on until the sun began its descent, and the dinner hour was upon them.

 

“Thank you all for your hard work,” Zelenka said. “We will get dinner, and then tomorrow, we will begin again.”

 

Vala headed back to the quarters she’d been sharing with Daniel to get cleaned up and changed, only to find Daniel waiting for her.

 

“I thought I’d have to pry you out of your lab,” Vala said lightly, unbuttoning her uniform shirt and skimming her undershirt over her head.

 

“I’m trying to be better about that sort of thing,” Daniel replied lightly. “Want some company?”

 

“I wouldn’t say no,” Vala responded.

 

Daniel _had_ been trying, and he scrubbed her back with every evidence of enjoyment. He ran his hands down her sides, the water slicking her skin. Vala turned under his hands and ran her fingers through his dampened hair.

 

His lips met hers hungrily, his hands were stroking her breasts, and he pushed her up against the wall of the shower. Vala wrapped her legs around his waist, and sank down, taking him inside.

 

Shower sex was tricky, but Daniel braced her against the wall, and they moved together, slick skin against slick skin.

 

And under the water, with Daniel’s face pressed against her shoulder, and her hands on his shoulders, it was all new. There were no memories that threatened to swamp her at the most inopportune moment, and she felt only pleasure.

 

“Vala,” Daniel said, and her name sounded like a prayer on his lips.

 

He came first, and he put her down slowly, using his fingers to bring her off, keeping his mouth on hers.

 

Vala rested her forehead against his shoulder as her orgasm rushed through her, making her feel just a little weak in the knees.

 

“You okay?” Daniel asked.

 

“Never better,” she assured him. “We should probably get dinner.”

 

“We probably should.” He pressed a quick kiss to her mouth. “You haven’t told me about your day yet.”

 

She laughed. “You didn’t give me a chance.”

 

Daniel smiled at her. “We’ve got all evening.”

 

Vala could get used to this.

 

~~~~~

 

Daniel really wished he had access to pen and paper on Atlantis, but paper was in short supply, and they had been discouraged from using it unless absolutely necessary. He thought better when he could write things out, but this was just one more way in which Atlantis was different.

 

And Daniel would have to change with the times, which meant not getting so wrapped up in his work that he forgot about Vala. She was the best thing that had happened to him in a long time, and he didn’t want to risk losing her.

 

He just wished there were more hours in the day. Daniel had the Ancient database to sort through and index, oral histories to record, and a new society to help construct.

 

Daniel thought he had a workable solution now that he’d gained some insight as to how the Ancients had dealt with childrearing, as well as the locations of what he thought were nurseries. He closed his laptop down and headed to meet Elizabeth in her office.

 

He found Mitchell already there, typing one-handed on a laptop. “Hey,” Daniel greeted them. “Is this still a good time?”

 

“Sit down,” Elizabeth replied. “John is on his way. He asked to be in on it, since our policies are going to impact his people.”

 

Daniel nodded. “This is just a preliminary assessment,” he said. “A more thorough exploration of the issues is going to take time.”

 

“That’s fine,” Elizabeth assured him.

 

Sheppard entered her office, looking rumpled and harried. “Sorry,” he murmured.

 

“Is there anything wrong?” Elizabeth asked.

 

“Nothing Lorne can’t handle,” he replied, perching on the edge of her desk. “But I should probably get back soon.”

 

“I’ll keep it short,” Daniel promised, ignoring the snort from Mitchell’s direction. “The Ancients did have children, but the birthrate was in serious decline, and the population decreased exponentially in the years before they sank Atlantis.”

 

Sheppard cleared his throat. “That makes sense. They were too focused on ascension to care about having kids.”

 

“That’s about the sum of it,” Daniel agreed. “Nevertheless, they _did_ have children, even in the midst of the war. There are apparently a couple of designated nurseries. I’ve pinned down an approximate location. I recommend that the survey teams focus on those areas, because there should be larger, family-sized quarters.”

 

Sheppard straightened. “Maybe we ought to give people a chance to move around. When we first arrived, we assigned folks to whatever quarters were available. We could change things up, do things more like the Athosians do.”

 

Daniel saw Sheppard’s point immediately. “You mean form family groups.”

 

Mitchell looked interested as well. “Give people a home away from home.”

 

“Everybody goes to the mainland,” Sheppard pointed. “Everybody gets a chance to be on a gate team. And we start grouping people together.”

 

Elizabeth frowned. “Won’t that foster divisions?”

 

“Not if we do it right,” Daniel replied. “We have a common enemy, and shared goals; that will keep people unified for the most part. Encouraging everyone to form family groups will ensure that if someone does have a child, there will be others who will raise him or her.”

 

Elizabeth glanced at Mitchell. “What do you think?”

 

“It’s not that different from what we already do with gate teams,” Mitchell pointed out. “And we always tried to keep people together. You wanted to know your teammates and trust that they’d have your back.” He met Daniel’s eyes. “That was one of the only reasons we made it.”

 

“Doing things that way will also intersperse officers and enlisted personnel,” Sheppard pointed out. “And I think it would be a settling influence to know there are superior officers around who can be called upon at a moment’s notice.”

 

Elizabeth’s eyebrows went up. “Is that what happened this morning? It’s not Barnes again, is it?”

 

Sheppard sighed. “For once, no, it wasn’t Barnes—although I’d like to send him back to the mainland. I think hard work might help him right now. He’s got too much time to think on the city.”

 

She nodded. “All right. Who was it?”

 

“One of the new ones, Jones. He got into it with Private Bancroft, although neither of them offered a satisfactory explanation for why.” Sheppard rubbed his eyes. “This place is a powder keg, Elizabeth.”

 

“I know it,” she replied. “I don’t think we can afford to send more people to the mainland, though, and we’re sending out as many gate teams as possible.”

 

Mitchell raised his good hand. “Why not teach them a useful skill? We need new uniforms, don’t we? I think Stackhouse came up with a list of about half a dozen people with enough skill to make new ones. So, start assigning people to sewing or mending detail. There have got to be other skills that we could use.”

 

“Leather working,” Sheppard inserted immediately. “We’re going to run out of nylon straps eventually, and we’re getting some hides from the Athosians.”

 

Daniel had spent his life studying ancient civilizations—learning how they lived, how they worked, what they created—and he’d learned a lot on Abydos. From Sha’re, Daniel had learned what made life good, how to grind grain and make bread, how to dance under the stars and drink sweet wine.

 

Some of that knowledge was going to come in very handy right about now.

 

“Alcohol,” Daniel blurted out. “And other means of entertainment. Even if we have to make our own, people need to experience joy.”

 

Sheppard frowned, looking skeptical. “I don’t think we’ve got the time for parties, Jackson.”

 

“It’s not about a party,” Daniel shot back. “It’s about making a life here. Look, I’ll bet the Athosians have regular celebrations.”

 

Sheppard’s expression softened. “Yeah, they do.”

 

“So, we find something to celebrate,” Daniel insisted. “And we get everyone involved in planning it.”

 

Elizabeth nodded. “I like that idea. Daniel? Do you want to be in charge?”

 

Daniel winced. “I don’t know if that’s such a good idea. Maybe you should ask Vala.”

 

Both Mitchell and Sheppard smirked at them, and the expressions they wore clearly said, “You’re throwing your girlfriend under the bus?”

 

Daniel hoped Vala wouldn’t see it that way, but his ability to plan parties was epically bad.

 

“Perhaps you could work with her,” Elizabeth agreed.

 

“Zelenka has a still,” Sheppard offered. “He might be willing to help.”

 

Mitchell shrugged. “You know, from what I’ve read, we’re coming up on the end of spring planting, and we’ve had a couple of teams come in from Earth. We could celebrate that.”

 

“I think that’s worth celebrating,” Elizabeth agreed. “Daniel, will you and Vala see to it?”

 

Daniel supposed he’d asked for it, but he was fairly certain that Jack would have laughed his ass off if he’d heard that Daniel had been appointed social co-chair for the city. “Of course. I’ll do my best.”

 

The gate alarm sounded, and Chuck’s voice came over the intercom. “Dr. Weir, I have an urgent message for Colonel Sheppard.”

 

Sheppard tapped his radio and ordered, “Patch it through, Chuck.”

 

“Colonel Sheppard, this is Myrna of the Korbans. Our sanctuaries have been rendered uninhabitable by Wraith worshippers hidden among my people. Please, we need your help.”

 

Sheppard’s face went tight with tension. “I want the two teams assembled and ready to go ASAP. Let Myrna know we’ll be there as soon as we can.”

 

Daniel could see Mitchell’s longing, and apparently Sheppard did, too, because he said, “If we need an extra pilot, I’ll call you, Mitchell.”

 

Mitchell shrugged. “Yeah, thanks.”

 

Sheppard clapped him on the shoulder. “I’m serious. Stay available. We might need you.”

 

Mitchell perked up a bit at that, and Daniel realized that he hadn’t seen Mitchell much in the last couple of weeks. After weeks in being in one another’s pockets, the team had fractured with differing responsibilities and concerns. Mitchell’s recovery, and his withdrawal, meant that Daniel hadn’t given much thought to reaching him.

 

Daniel thought he should probably remedy that soon.

 

They turned their attention to the gate room, where Sheppard was securing his thigh holster. Ronon, Teyla, and McKay were there, also gearing up. Daniel followed Mitchell and Elizabeth down the stairs as a platoon of Marines jogged up to Sheppard.

 

“It’s Carter’s turn on duty,” McKay explained, his chin tilted defiantly. “So, I’m going.”

 

“Did I say anything?” Elizabeth asked, sounding amused.

 

McKay deflated slightly. “No, but just in case you were going to.”

 

“Just be careful,” Elizabeth advised.

 

“Always am,” Sheppard insisted.

 

McKay rolled his eyes, and Ronon and Teyla smirked at each other. “Don’t give me that, Sheppard,” McKay said. “That’s why I’m here. To make sure you don’t do anything stupid.”

 

Now it was Sheppard’s turn to roll his eyes, and to Daniel, it felt familiar—the bickering used to decrease tension before a mission.

 

“Keep me informed,” Elizabeth ordered.

 

Sheppard nodded, his expression serious again. “Of course. Let’s go, people.”

 

Daniel watched as they stepped through the gate, surprised to find that he didn’t miss it nearly as much as he thought he would.

 

Then again, he had more than enough to keep him busy on Atlantis.


	6. Perceived Threats

_“In our culture, there is no greater betrayal than for someone to become a Wraith worshipper. Once a person begins to walk that path, his family and friends will turn their backs on him. If he goes where he is not welcomed by others of his kind, he will be killed on sight, because he cannot be trusted not to signal the Wraith, or to sabotage efforts to escape a culling. So, you see, we have ways to deal with Wraith worshippers, but we had no experience with someone like Kolya.”_

 

~Interview with Teyla Emmagan

 

No one met them at the gate, and that alone would have concerned Teyla, even without the distress call. “Where is Myrna?” Teyla asked. She’d come to like the headwoman quite a bit since they’d begun trading with this world.

 

John shook his head. “I don’t know, and I don’t like it.”

 

“Too quiet,” Ronon agreed.

 

John turned to look at the Marines that had followed them through the gate. “We may be looking for survivors or bodies to bury, but if the Wraith worshippers are still here, shoot to kill. We show no mercy.”

 

Teyla nodded approvingly, and Ronon echoed the movement. She saw the surprise register on the Marines’ faces, but no one argued. They jogged toward the village at a fast clip; John was clearly anxious to find answers.

 

She saw the smoke, and she knew that John had seen it, too, because he increased his pace. Teyla could hear some of the Marines panting behind her, and John called out, “Increased PT from here on out. If you’re breathing hard, you’d better start working twice as hard.”

 

She heard a ragged chorus of groans from behind her and heard Ronon chuckle. Rodney didn’t seem to be having any problems keeping up, although he wasn’t saying much. Teyla was left to wonder whether Rodney had been working out on his own, and why he would, when he always insisted that he got enough exercise running away from bad guys.

 

They spread out once they reached the village, with Ronon staying close by Teyla’s side. Rodney stayed close to John, and the Marines split up in twos and threes.

 

They found a couple of bodies of elderly villagers. Judging from the wounds on their throats or wrists, Teyla guessed that they had committed suicide rather than be taken by the Wraith. It wasn’t a choice that she would have made, but then, she’d learned to have hope from the Lanteans.

 

She had learned that the Wraith could be beaten, too.

 

Teyla heard a war cry, and she whirled to face the threat, her P-90 at the ready. The man looked no different than any other human she’d run across, but he was wielding an ax and bearing down on them.

 

Ronon raised his blaster and fired without a moment’s hesitation, and the man collapsed dead in his tracks.

 

That man was just the first of a dozen, though, and the others weren’t nearly so brash. They fired arrows at them from under cover, and although they kept firing, no one offered a clear target.

 

“Come on,” Ronon muttered. “Let’s flank them.”

 

Teyla followed Ronon’s lead as he crept around the perimeter, and they managed to take out two Wraith worshippers without being spotted. None of them seemed to expect Teyla and Ronon’s maneuver; the Wraith worshippers focused their firepower on the Marines and John and Rodney, who had taken shelter behind a wagon.

 

She and Ronon moved silently through the underbrush surrounding the village and killed four more before the rest of the Wraith worshippers seemed to realize that there were enemies in the surrounding woods.

 

Teyla and Ronon retreated, but not before the Wraith worshippers began firing in their direction. Teyla hit the ground, and Ronon dropped next to her, letting the arrows pass harmlessly over their heads. Once the first volley ended, they began crawling back towards the village, taking out another couple of Wraith worshippers on their way.

 

Rodney was kneeling over John as they approached. “We need a medical team!” he called, sounding desperate. “Please!”

 

“Rodney, I’m fine,” John protested weakly.

 

Rodney had his hands over a wound in John’s leg. “You’re losing blood fast,” Rodney objected. “So, just shut up.”

 

Teyla fell to her knees next to John and pushed Rodney’s hands away. “We need a tourniquet,” she said.

 

Rodney whipped off his belt. “Here.”

 

Teyla smiled. “Thank you, Rodney.”

 

She pulled the belt tight around John’s thigh, which was still oozing blood. John’s face was pale, and she could see the pulse in his neck fluttering rapidly. “I think you’re going to be off your feet for a while, John.”

 

John winced. “I can’t afford to be injured.”

 

“Tough,” Rodney shot back. “You were the one who didn’t duck fast enough.”

 

“Ronon, see if you can find Myrna, or at least find out what happened to the other villagers,” John called.

 

“We’re calling a medical team,” Rodney insisted.

 

“Did I say you shouldn’t?” John demanded. “Cortez, head back to the gate. Call the doctor.”

 

“You got it, boss,” Cortez replied with a salute. “I’m already on my way.”

 

“Teyla, you and Ronon should check for survivors,” John said.

 

Teyla knew better than to listen to John when he was in this condition. “Ronon will do just fine without me,” she replied. “Quinn, go with Ronon.”

 

“Yes, ma’am,” Quinn replied with a salute. Her grin told Teyla that she relished the assignment. “I’m on it.”

 

Ronon threw a quick glance at John and said, “Our pleasure.”

 

Teyla kept pressure on John’s wound, checking every so often to see if the bleeding had stopped. John grunted each time, so she knew he hadn’t lost consciousness, but the injury was obviously serious.

 

John grew paler by the moment, and Teyla wondered where the doctor was. Just as she had begun to think that she’d have to go back to Atlantis herself and drag Dr. Beckett through the gate with her, she felt a harsh breeze blow her hair around her face. A jumper uncloaked just inches from them, and the back hatch opened, disgorging half a dozen Marines, a nurse, and Dr. Beckett.

 

“What kind of mess have we here?” Dr. Beckett asked, rolling a gurney down the ramp. “There now, Colonel. Let’s get you back to the city.”

 

“This is quite the service,” John managed faintly.

 

“Nothing but the best for our fearless leader,” Colonel Mitchell called from the front of the Jumper.

 

John waved a hand. “Nobody likes a smartass, Mitchell.”

 

“Now, why don’t I believe you?” Mitchell asked. “Doc?”

 

“Let’s head back,” Beckett replied. “Teyla, be a love and let the others know we’re leaving.”

 

Teyla tapped her radio and relayed the message to those on the ground. Rodney had remained stubbornly by John’s side, and he ran a soothing hand over John’s hair. The gesture was a little awkward, but sweet, and Teyla realized that Rodney must be making progress.

 

“Not long now,” Rodney murmured. “ _When_ will you learn to duck?”

 

“Hey, I ducked,” John protested faintly. “It’s not my fault that there were two people shooting at me.”

 

“Well, they won’t be shooting at anyone again,” Rodney replied with grim satisfaction.

 

“Did you kill them?” Mitchell asked from the front of the jumper.

 

“What do you think?” Rodney demanded. “ _Of course_ , I killed them. They were trying to kill us!”

 

Mitchell flew the jumper expertly through the gate and landed in the gate room. “Good to know you can handle yourself, McKay.”

 

“My team counts on me,” McKay replied haughtily. “Come on, Carson. Let’s get a move on.”

 

Dr. Beckett rolled his eyes good-naturedly, but he didn’t protest.

 

Rodney helped Dr. Beckett roll the gurney down the ramp and into the gate room, and it was obvious that he planned to follow John all the way to the infirmary. Teyla followed them because she didn’t see another choice, and she wanted confirmation that John would be all right.

 

Dr. Beckett removed the bandage on John’s leg and allowed one of the nurses to cut open John’s pants. “Looks like there might be something left in the wound. Let’s prep him for surgery.”

 

Teyla grabbed Rodney’s arm and tugged him back. “Come on, Rodney. Dr. Weir will want a report.”

 

“But John—”

 

“He’ll be fine,” Teyla promised recklessly. “He’s had worse injuries. Come, let Dr. Beckett do his job.”

 

Dr. Beckett offered them a reassuring smile. “I’ll call the moment there’s word.”

 

Teyla tugged Rodney out of the infirmary and propelled him down the hall and towards the conference room. “Do you really think he’ll be okay?” Rodney asked anxiously.

 

“Dr. Beckett will have John on his feet before you know it,” Teyla said. “Kanaan’s wound was much worse, and he was on his feet in just a couple of weeks.”

 

“That’s true,” Rodney replied, sounding a little more cheerful.

 

Teyla smiled. “How has your relationship with John progressed?”

 

Rodney flushed and shrugged. “I don’t know. He seems to be amenable, but we haven’t really had any time. I thought—well, it doesn’t matter what I thought. John took Keras’ death hard.”

 

“He would,” Teyla agreed.

 

Rodney sighed. “I’ve been doing what you said. I’m not sure John gets the message, but then, I don’t know how _I_ would know that he had.”

 

“Just be there for him, Rodney,” Teyla advised. “Sooner or later, John will realize that what you feel for him is more than friendship.”

 

“Maybe,” Rodney said glumly. “I guess we’ll see.”

 

The debriefing went much as Teyla expected. Wraith worshippers could not be trusted, and she wasn’t sorry they were dead.

 

“What do you think their purpose was?” Elizabeth asked.

 

“They are Wraith worshippers,” Teyla pointed out evenly. “They have no other purpose than to provide more victims for the Wraith, as we have seen. We do not know how many of those in the village were culled, but we did not find Myrna.”

 

“Ronon and the others are still looking,” Rodney pointed out, sounding much more composed than he had earlier. “We might save a few.”

 

“Let’s hope so,” Elizabeth replied. “We can’t afford to lose more allies. What else?”

 

Teyla shook her head. “There was nothing else. There were a few dead, probably from self-inflicted wounds because they wouldn’t risk being taken by the Wraith.”

 

Elizabeth winced. “Is that typical?”

 

“In some cultures,” Teyla admitted. “There are those who would sooner die than be culled, of course, although there are few among the Athosians who would choose that path.”

 

Teyla’s people viewed natural death as the ultimate goal, as it happened so rarely.

 

Elizabeth nodded. “I’ll wait for Ronon’s report before I made any decisions. Thank you, Teyla. What can we do to deal with this threat?”

 

Rodney sighed. “Honestly, from what I’ve seen, nothing. There will always be those who side with the side they feel is strongest. That’s what the Wraith worshippers are doing.”

 

Teyla thought of Ford, who had become addicted to the Wraith enzyme, and her own reaction to it. She thought there might be more to it than just a desire to ally with the stronger side.

 

Worship of the Wraith was a sickness that had to be stamped out, as far as Teyla was concerned.

 

Elizabeth sighed. “Very well. Cam, do you have any suggestions?”

 

“I think you covered all the basics,” Mitchell replied.

 

Teyla elbowed Rodney and nodded significantly at Mitchell. “Thanks for your help,” Rodney said, almost sounding gracious. “I think I’d better go back to the infirmary to check on John. Excuse me.”

 

They watched him go, and Elizabeth glanced over at Teyla, a silent question in her eyes. Teyla shrugged and smiled, and Elizabeth shook her head. Mitchell appeared a little confused, but Teyla thought he’d probably come to understand what John and Rodney meant to each other eventually.

 

After all, Teyla knew he understood the value of team.

 

~~~~~

 

Evan stopped by the infirmary to check on Sheppard, and was grateful to see his CO sitting up and eating a light breakfast, even if he looked a little too pale. “Looking good, sir.”

 

Sheppard grimaced. “We need to stop meeting like this, Lorne.”

 

Evan settled himself in the chair next to Sheppard’s bed. “I figured I’d have to fight McKay for this seat.”

 

“Yeah, well, Carson made him go eat breakfast and take a shower,” Sheppard replied, although there was a pleased, shy smile on his face.

 

Evan knew just how Sheppard felt; knowing that he’d see Laro shortly for breakfast put the same kind of smile on his own face. “Is there anything you want me to do for you?” Evan asked.

 

“Just look after the city,” Sheppard replied with a sigh. “I trust you, Evan.”

 

That was about the best compliment that Evan had received, and he nodded. “Thank you, sir.”

 

Sheppard waved him off. “Make sure nobody blows the city up.”

 

“Yes, sir,” Evan replied easily. “I’ve got a mission today, but I can find a replacement.”

 

Sheppard shook his head. “No, you should go. I think we’ll make it work.”

 

“Feel better,” Evan said.

 

“Tell Brista I said hello,” Sheppard replied.

 

Laro was waiting for him in the mess, and Evan slid into the seat next to him, letting their knees bump companionably. “Did you sleep well?” Laro asked quietly.

 

Evan nodded. “No emergencies, so I slept through. How about you?”

 

“The moonlight on the water turned out to be a great inspiration,” Laro replied with a smile, his warm brown eyes crinkling at the corners. “I did not sleep much, but I threw two pots.”

 

“At least you got something done,” Evan teased.

 

Laro bumped his shoulder against Evan’s. “Radek’s kiln is wonderful, by the way.”

 

Evan felt unaccountably pleased, considering that he’d done very little to build it. “I hope you told Radek as much. I didn’t have much to do with it.”

 

“Of course,” Laro replied. “But you were the one who asked him to build it.”

 

Evan shrugged. “I wanted to keep you on Atlantis as long as I could, or at least make it a little more difficult to leave.”

 

“You wouldn’t have had to build me a kiln to accomplish that goal,” Laro said softly.

 

Evan felt himself blush, but he was spared from having to answer by the arrival of Mehra and Zelenka. “I hear we’re heading off-world today,” Mehra said cheerfully.

 

Although Dusty Mehra had not originally been a part of Evan’s team, he’d spent two weeks with her among the Athosians, and he liked her quite a bit. Technically, Evan didn’t have a permanent team assigned to him, but he had heard that Sheppard wanted to make sure that everyone had a permanent team, whether they went off-world or not.

 

Evan understood the impetus, and he agreed up to a point. Evan knew that Sheppard and his team were as close as family—and closer than some—but that was luck as much as choice. Just because a group of people was assigned to the same team didn’t mean they’d wind up being close. As far as Evan was concerned, his family was back on Earth, even if he was finding new friends here.

 

And Evan had Laro now, and he was wise enough to know that he would never have met the man if Atlantis hadn’t been cut off from Earth. This relationship meant a lot to him; he thought it could be the start of something special, something real.

 

“What world are you visiting?” Laro asked. “If you can tell me.”

 

“The Ebrus,” Evan said. “The first shipment of cloth is ready for us, and we’re delivering more medical supplies.”

 

“Have you found anyone who can sew?” Laro asked with a thoughtful expression on his face.

 

Evan shrugged. “There were a couple of people who admitted they had used a sewing machine, and a few who had actually made costumes for plays and such, but it’s probably not going to be enough people to outfit the whole city.”

 

“I think I might have a solution,” Laro said. “Give me a little time to make inquiries.”

 

Evan raised his eyebrows. “You’ll be doing better than the rest of us. None of us have experience running a colony, and there are a lot of skills we didn’t plan on needing.”

 

Laro smiled. “Then this is a true partnership.”

 

“As long as I don’t have to do any sewing,” Mehra inserted, reminding Evan that he wasn’t alone at the table with Laro, a fact he seemed to forget on a regular basis. “Home Ec was the only class I came close to flunking.”

 

“‘Home Ec?’” Laro asked.

 

Mehra tried earnestly to explain home economics to both Laro and Zelenka, who apparently didn’t have any better idea what that was than Laro did. And then, Evan and Mehra had to move quickly or be late for the dial-out.

 

They took a jumper for this mission to the Ebrus, since they needed the cargo space for the inbound medical supplies and the outbound cloth. Dr. Lam joined them to answer any medical questions the Ebrus might have, and she sat in the co-pilot’s seat.

 

“How are you settling in?” Evan asked, just to make conversation.

 

She made a face. “It’s been different. We’d been going for so long without rest, it’s hard to believe we’re relatively safe.”

 

“Relatively being the operative word,” Mehra said from behind Dr. Lam. “Wait until you see your first Wraith.”

 

“I think I’d like to put that off as long as I can,” Lam replied dryly.

 

Evan shrugged. “As long as we can keep the Wraith from figuring out that Atlantis is still in one piece, you can probably put it off indefinitely.”

 

Lam stared out at the rolling green fields passing by the view screen. “Carson seems to think he has a solution to take out the Wratih.”

 

“The retrovirus?” Evan asked, shaking his head. He’d been in on the initial briefing, and the subsequent updates that Beckett had given Weir, Sheppard, and McKay. The idea of turning the Wraith into human was seductive, but he didn’t see how it was going to work.

 

Lam nodded. “The idea has merit, but I’m not sure we can take the risk, not without being able to hope for reinforcements from Earth.”

 

The conversation came to an end when Evan landed in the field outside of Brista’s village they had been told they could use.

 

As usual, the Ebrus were grateful for the medical supplies and help; they had very few healers of their own for some reason, and many of their people died of relatively minor problems. Since Parrish had come up with a way to produce penicillin, Atlantis could afford to be generous with basic antibiotics.

 

The bolts of cloth Evan helped load were of varying weights, and mostly dark gray and cream, although Brista pointed out a few brighter colors she’d included—a blue similar to that worn by the sciences, a reddish brown, and a green. All of the fabric was soft and seemed well made to Evan’s inexperienced eye.

 

Staff Sergeant Brian Patterson, who had been one of the few to admit to having experience working with cloth, confirmed Evan’s impression. “It’s great stuff, sir,” Patterson said in an undertone. “We got a bargain.”

 

Evan nodded. “That’s good to hear, Sergeant.”

 

Brista had a few questions for Lam regarding the antibiotics, so she invited them to stay for lunch. Since Evan had permission to accept such an invitation if one w forthascoming, he agreed.

 

They were halfway through their meal when Dr. Weir’s voice crackled over the radio. “Major Lorne,” she began, “we’ve got a team in trouble. With Colonel Sheppard out of commission, we need you back on Atlantis, and we may need Dr. Lam as well.”

 

“We’re on our way,” Evan promised. “I’m sorry to cut this short, Brista, but we received word of an emergency.”

 

Brista nodded. “Of course. We would not want to keep you from your duties. You will wish Colonel Sheppard a quick recovery, won’t you?”

 

“I will,” Evan replied. “He’ll be glad to know you thought of him. Patterson, Mehra, let’s move.” He didn’t presume to give orders to Lam, who might not outrank him, but might end up being in charge of Evan’s treatment at some point. Evan found it best to treat doctors with as much deference as he could under the circumstances.

 

Lam moved just as quickly as Mehra and Patterson, though, and they were heading for Atlantis moments later. “We’re on our way,” Evan told Weir. “What’s the status?”

 

She briefed them on the short flight to the gate. One of the teams sent out to make contact with a potential new ally had walked right into a Wraith attack. Lieutenant Ngo had sent out a distress call to Atlantis and had done what he could to assist the natives to hide from the Wraith. Ngo’s transmission had been cut short, and Atlantis had been unable to re-establish contact.

 

By the time Weir finished giving him a succinct report, Evan had landed the jumper and found Dr. Weir waiting for him. “Vala, Ronon, and Teyla are ready to move, along with a platoon of Marines,” she said. “I’m sending Colonel Mitchell in another jumper. He’s to stay cloaked in case you need the extra firepower.”

 

Although he was a little surprised that Weir had agreed to let Mitchell accompany them, Evan knew it was probably going to get harder and harder to keep Mitchell on the city when there was action elsewhere.

 

“I’d like to take Mehra and Cadman with me, too,” Evan replied.

 

“Lieutenant Cadman is already preparing,” Weir replied. “Sergeant Mehra?”

 

“Ready, willing, and able, ma’am,” Mehra replied smartly.

 

Weir tapped her radio. “Colonel Mitchell, Major Lorne is ready to go, and he’s in charge for the purposes of this exercise. Dr. Lam will be on standby in case you need medical assistance.”

 

“Yes, ma’am,” Mitchell replied, his voice coming through loud and clear on Evan’s radio.

 

Lam nodded. “I’ll get my kit ready.”

 

He had no time to think about leading a senior officer in the field, and no chance to consider what might happen if he allowed Teyla or Ronon to be hurt on his watch either. Evan tossed off a salute to Weir and headed for one of the waiting jumpers, one that wasn’t packed with bolts of cloth.

 

“Good luck, Major,” Weir said over the radio as Evan slid into the pilot’s seat, Teyla sliding into place next to him.

 

“Thanks,” Evan replied shortly. He waited until he was sure that everyone was seated or strapped in.

 

“Wormhole established,” Chuck declared triumphantly over the radio.

 

Evan took his jumper in first, uncloaked, hoping to draw attention away from the team on the ground and the cloaked jumper coming through the gate behind him. He narrowly avoided a head-on collision with a Wraith dart, banking sharply to the left just in time before engaging his cloak.

 

“See if you can raise Ngo on the radio,” Evan ordered Teyla.

 

Her calm, steady voice was a balm as she said, “Lieutenant Ngo? This is Teyla Emmagan. Please respond.”

 

“This is Private Merriman,” came the slightly panicked call. “I don’t know where the lieutenant is, ma’am!”

 

“Where are you?” Teyla asked, still keeping the same even tone. Evan kept one ear on the conversation, while dropping his cloak to take out a couple of darts with drones before raising the cloak again.

 

He spared a moment to note that Mitchell took out another dart, becoming visible for an instant before disappearing again.

 

“On the eastern side of the village, away from the gate,” Merriman responded a little more calmly, probably responding to Teyla’s equanimity. “Lieutenant Ngo said I should help get some of the kids away.”

 

“I’m here with Major Lorne, and we’re going to help,” Teyla assured her. “Are you safe?”

 

“There are caves,” Merriman replied. “I think so.”

 

“Stay there,” Evan ordered her. “Stay calm and stay low until I tell you otherwise, Private.”

 

“Yes, sir,” she said.

 

Evan dropped the jumper down, almost skimming the ground and checking the readouts for any telltale signs that their team was still alive. He couldn’t see Merriman’s tracker, which meant that something was interfering with the signal.

 

And that meant that the trackers might be worthless.

 

“Lorne, I think I’ve got something,” Mitchell said.

 

Evan saw the signal the same moment that Mitchell did, and he said, “I’ve got it. We’re going to set down and fight from the ground. Do what you can to cover us.”

 

Moments later, Evan set the jumper down and followed the Marines out. “Cadman, what have you got for me?”

 

“A truly awesome rocket launcher, sir!” Cadman called back.

 

“Mehra, with Cadman,” Evan replied. “Keep the artillery coming. Watch out for the darts, everyone.”

 

The next few minutes were a blur of action. Evan hadn’t bothered giving orders to Ronon, Teyla or Vala; he’d read the mission reports from M7G-677. The three of them knew what they were doing, and he knew enough not to get in the way.

 

Evan had no idea if the Wraith had finished their culling, or if there had been enough resistance to make staying not worth their while, but eventually the Wraith retreated back through the wormhole.

 

He looked around for his people and tapped his radio, “Report!”

 

One by one, Evan received confirmation that the Lanteans were in one piece. “All right, Merriman,” Evan began, “Get everyone back to the village as quickly as possible. I don’t want to risk the Wraith returning.”

 

Mitchell’s jumper uncloaked next to Evan’s and the back hatch opened. Mitchell emerged with his right hand in a sling and a zat in his left. “Any sign of the missing team?”

 

“No, sir,” Evan replied.

 

The radio crackled. “This is Lieutenant Ngo. Is anyone there?”

 

Evan breathed a sigh of relief. “This is Major Lorne. What happened, Lieutenant?”

 

“We went underground, sir. There’s a natural mineral that interferes with radio transmissions,” Ngo explained. “We didn’t know until we’d retreated.”

 

Evan exchanged a look with Mitchell. “We’re on the eastern edge of town, so get a move on. We want to avoid a repeat.”

 

~~~~~

 

John hated waiting, particularly when he had people out there. He’d offered to fly a jumper, but Carson had said in no uncertain terms that he was not to leave the city. “In fact,” the doctor had said, clearly warming to his topic. “You’re to go nowhere but your quarters and the mess.”

 

At John’s expression, he had relented slightly. “And Rodney’s lab and Elizabeth’s office,” he added. “And use the crutches!”

 

So, John found himself waiting for word in Elizabeth’s office, his injured leg propped on the pillow.

 

“It’s hard, isn’t it?” Elizabeth asked softly.

 

He sighed. “I’ve never been good at waiting. At least I know they’re in good hands with Lorne and Mitchell.”

 

Elizabeth smiled. “We could talk about some of the matters of governance.”

 

John grimaced. “Governance?”

 

“We’re going to have to decide how to approach it,” Elizabeth replied reasonably.

 

John shifted in his chair and ignored the sharp pain in his thigh. With the looming shortage of painkillers, John had opted to go without as soon as Carson released him. He was regretting that right now. “I thought the charter made you governor.”

 

“That’s just a stopgap measure,” Elizabeth pointed out reasonably. “Eventually, we’ll have to let those on Atlantis decide what to do.”

 

John didn’t like the thought of Elizabeth not being in charge, and he said as much. “No offense to anyone on the city, but I’m not sure I trust them to act en masse.”

 

Elizabeth smiled. “I have every faith in our people to do the right thing.”

 

“We’re in a war zone,” John protested. “We can’t afford to be changing up leadership in the middle of a conflict.”

 

“I’m not talking about changing anything to do with the military,” Elizabeth replied. “You’re going to remain the military commander, although we’re going to have to decide how to do promotions.”

 

“Promotions have as much to do with pay and privileges as with a title,” John countered.

 

Elizabeth raised an eyebrow. “You wouldn’t want to be a general?”

 

John grinned. “No, not if it meant staying behind a desk.”

 

She laughed. “Fair enough.”

 

“That brings up a good point, though. We can start finding privileges and other things to encourage good behavior, and start taking away privileges for bad behavior,” John suggested. “Things like chocolate or coffee, or alcohol.”

 

Elizabeth nodded. “That sounds promising. And governing the city?”

 

“I told you, we’re in a war zone,” John replied, knowing that he sounded peevish. “Things are fine as they are. Besides, who would replace you? People here are used to you, and they trust you. Democracy is all well and good, but there’s no sense in introducing uncertainty now.”

 

She sighed. “I just—”

 

“You want to do the right thing,” John supplied, interrupting her. “And I get that, I do. But there’s no sense in jeopardizing our survival to observe the social niceties. If someone brings it up, or starts agitating for change, then we deal with it. Right now, you’re in charge.”

 

Elizabeth nodded slowly. “All right. For what it’s worth, I agree.”

 

“Good, then that’s settled. You aren’t getting out of being in charge that easily,” John said with a smile to take the sting out of his words.

 

She shrugged and returned the smile. “Thanks for the vote of confidence.”

 

“You’ve earned it,” John replied sincerely.

 

And she had. Whatever John’s misgivings about Elizabeth’s leadership capabilities had been, they’d long since been laid to rest.

 

John was grateful when Rodney bustled into Elizabeth’s office, interrupting their moment. “There you are!” Rodney said, clearly irritated. “Carson said he’d released you.”

 

“You could have called me over the radio,” John pointed out, not willing to miss the opportunity to tweak Rodney, even though there seemed to be something going on between them now.

 

John had no idea what that _something_ was, but in this case, he was willing to go with it.

 

“I could have,” Rodney replied. “And then I found out that Teyla and Ronon had gone with Lorne, and my superior powers of deduction led me here.”

 

John grinned. “That, and Carson told you he refused to let me go along.”

 

“And quite right,” Rodney shot back. “You’re in no shape to be doing anything other than sitting and the occasional hobbling around.”

 

That was just too bad, in John’s opinion. He was beginning to think that Rodney was serious about this relationship. While Rodney might have made a move after Cooper’s death, John had passed out after drinking just a little too much _ruus_ wine, and there hadn’t been another opportunity.

 

“Have a seat, Rodney,” Elizabeth invited, an amused tilt to her mouth. “We’re still waiting on word.”

 

Rodney plopped down in a free chair. “So what is it this time?” he asked a little peevishly. “Rebel Genii, Wraith worshippers, or Wraith? Or maybe something else I hadn’t thought about. God, is there something I hadn’t thought about?”

 

“Probably,” John drawled, and then relented when he saw Elizabeth’s reproving expression. “All evidence suggests that it’s Wraith,” John supplied. “Lieutenant Ngo’s transmission got cut off before he could deliver the full report.”

 

Rodney winced. “That’s not good.”

 

John’s worry ratcheted up again. “I’m aware,” he replied, more sharply than he intended.

 

Elizabeth cleared her throat. “We have no idea what’s happened yet,” she pointed out. “There’s no sense in worrying now.”

 

John agreed, but he didn’t see how he could keep from worrying.

 

“The good news is that the things we thought were sewing machines actually _are_ ,” Rodney said.

 

“That’s good news?” John asked.

 

“At least we have something to do with all that cloth we traded for,” Rodney pointed out reasonably. “Plus, we’ve got a bunch of quarters that should be open in another week or so, and many of them are suites.”

 

“I’d like to start rooming established teams together,” John said. “That will have the advantage of putting senior officers close to junior officers and enlisted men, too.”

 

“I like the idea,” Elizabeth said. “But what about those who aren’t part of an off-world team, or who might prefer to remain alone?”

 

“Why don’t we ask them?” Rodney suggested. “Some of them might feel left out, but a few are going to be just as happy living alone. It will be better if they have a choice.”

 

Elizabeth nodded. “John, you’ll talk to the military personnel, and Rodney, talk to the science departments.”

 

Rodney sighed. “Can’t I get Sam to do it? She’s much better with people.”

 

John was surprised that Rodney would admit that someone—even Sam Carter—was better at _anything_. Apparently, his surprise must have shown on his face, because Rodney added, a little defensively, “I’ve always said that I’m petty, arrogant, and bad with people.”

 

“And we like you just the way you are, buddy,” John assured him.

 

“If Dr. Carter is willing, then you can delegate,” Elizabeth replied. “But you might try being _better_ with people.”

 

Rodney shrugged. “Quite frankly, I don’t have the time, but I’ll do my best.”

 

Chuck’s voice came over the all-call channel. “Major Lorne reported that they’re okay. The Wraith are gone, and everyone is accounted for. The inhabitants are grateful for the help we offered. Major Lorne and Colonel Mitchell are going to stay to help clean up, and they’ve requested medical assistance.”

 

“Radio Dr. Lam and let her know she’s needed,” Elizabeth ordered. “She’s been on standby.”

 

“Great,” Rodney said briskly as he rose. “Crisis averted, ally gained, and time for all injured colonels to be in their beds.”

 

John glared at Rodney. “I’m fine, McKay. Really.”

 

“Funny, I don’t believe you,” Rodney shot back. “Carson said you left the infirmary without painkillers, and that you’d probably need them. Judging by your expression and your general aura of feeling shitty, you really do. So, come on, let’s go.”

 

John glanced towards Elizabeth for help and found no succor there. “Rodney…” he began.

 

“Your protests fall on deaf ears,” Rodney said, cutting John off. “We need you in one piece, Colonel, as I’m sure Elizabeth will agree. That means you rest.”

 

Elizabeth was already nodding, so John knew he wasn’t going to get anywhere. “Fine,” he sighed.

 

Rodney led John back towards his quarters but steered John in the direction of his own room last minute. “I have a bigger bed and more pillows,” Rodney pointed out when John voiced a protest. “You’re staying there at least for tonight.”

 

John rolled his eyes but didn’t say more. In truth, his arms were tired from using the crutches, and he was about dead on his feet. Although Carson had given him a blood transfusion, that hadn’t been enough to completely replace what he’d lost.

 

By the time he swung himself into Rodney’s quarters, his arms were shaking from the exertion, and his leg ached so much that he didn’t even protest when Rodney gave him a couple of pills and a glass of water.

 

“Take these,” Rodney ordered. “And I’ll help you undress.”

 

Under better circumstances, John might have made a pass, but right now, all he wanted was to collapse. Rodney helped John get his boots, pants, and overshirt off, and then he nudged John to the far side of the bed. “I’ll bring you dinner,” he promised. “So, just stay put and sleep.”

 

John was too tired to do more than murmur an assent, and then he was gone.

 

~~~~~

 

When Rodney called to tell Elizabeth that John was in Rodney’s room and wasn’t to be disturbed, she agreed without comment. She suspected that John’s team would be the first to move into the larger, family-sized suites, and that SG-1 wouldn’t be far behind.

 

Elizabeth had no intention of moving, not least because she felt that as the leader, she had to remain one step removed from those she led. John and Rodney were in a different category, but she couldn’t afford a relationship with either of them.

 

Not that John or Rodney had ever expressed an interest, of course, and they were completely wrapped up in each other now.

 

Elizabeth wished she had someone to confide in; she’d give just about anything to pick up the phone and hear her mom’s voice on the other end. Even though she couldn’t have given her mom any details about the situation, Elizabeth had always been able to call her in the middle of tricky negotiations in the past. She’d always been able to hear her mom say, “I know you’ll do your best, sweetheart, and that will be good enough. It has to be.”

 

Pressing the heels of her hands into her eyes, Elizabeth tried to hold the tears at bay. She couldn’t afford to break down now; once she started, she might not be able to stop.

 

Teyla might understand, but she was off-world just now. John couldn’t deal with tears; he’d pat her awkwardly on the shoulder and flee. Rodney would respond in much the same way.

 

There was no one on the city she could trust to help her pick up the pieces.

 

“Oh, hey, is this a bad time?”

 

Elizabeth looked up, startled, to see Cam hovering in the doorway. “No, not at all,” she said briskly, blinking away the excess moisture in her eyes.

 

Cam’s expression was completely sympathetic. “Tough day, huh?”

 

“I miss my mom,” she admitted, surprised at the words that came out of her mouth. She hadn’t meant to say that.

 

“Me, too,” Cam said readily. “I’m used to being able to call her pretty much whenever I’m on Earth.”

 

Elizabeth breathed out a sigh of relief. “I know what you mean. I feel like I should be used to this after two years on Atlantis, but—”

 

“You never get used to having your mom out of reach,” Cam said reasonably. “By distance, or by death—at least, that’s what I hear, and I’d believe it.”

 

“I would believe it, too,” Elizabeth admitted. She took a deep, steadying breath. “How did the mission go?”

 

Cam just lit up, the smile on his face more genuine than it had been since Elizabeth had met him. “Great!” he said. “Major Lorne did an excellent job.”

 

“I’m glad to hear that,” Elizabeth replied. “I’m sorry about earlier, putting him in charge. I realize that meant I stepped on your toes, but—”

 

“Hey, no,” Cam said quickly. “I’m barely in the military at this point. I probably should drop the colonel.”

 

Elizabeth narrowed her eyes, unwilling to let Cam drop back into his self-pitying mode. “What rank did your father have when he retired?”

 

“He was medically discharged,” Cam corrected her automatically. “But I get what you’re saying. Folks were using his rank long after he was out.”

 

Elizabeth knew that she probably wouldn’t be able to keep Cam on the city; he’d always be looking for a way to get back in the action.  “You’ll do what you can,” she said quietly. “You _are_ needed here.”

 

Cam nodded. “Yeah, sorry to be such a whiner.”

 

“You aren’t,” she replied with a smile. “And even if you were, you’re allowed.”

 

“It’s just—after Antarctica, the doctors told me that I might get the use of my legs back. Now—” He moved the hand tucked into the sling. “There’s nothing there. There’s no chance I’ll get the full use of my hand back.”

 

Elizabeth sympathized, but she had no idea how it might feel to be grounded, taken out of the action when he’d been used to being in the thick of things. Elizabeth had always been a negotiator, called in after the action was over, and kept safe from violence.

 

“I can’t imagine how you feel,” she finally said, knowing the power of honesty in a moment like this. “I know this is hard for you.”

 

Cam shrugged. “I’m alive, and I have my team. This is hard for everyone. It’s hard for you.”

 

Elizabeth didn’t disagree, although she insisted, “I’ll be fine.”

 

“No offense, but you asked me to be your alternate,” Cam said. “Maybe you should take the afternoon off.”

 

Elizabeth shook her head. “I can’t do that to you. You were just on a mission,” she objected.

 

“Yeah, and I’m still wired from adrenalin,” Cam replied easily. “I’ll be keyed up for hours now. Take the afternoon. Go do something fun.”

 

“Like what?” Elizabeth shot back, realizing too late how much that revealed about the current state of her life.

 

Cam came around the desk and perched on the edge next to her. “I don’t know,” he admitted. “It’s not like I have much of a life either. But maybe you could find a movie to watch or a book to read. Maybe you should learn how to knit.”

 

“How to knit?” Elizabeth asked incredulously.

 

He grinned at her. “It was just a suggestion.”

 

She rolled her eyes, but found a grin pulling at her lips. “I’ve tried to learn,” she admitted. “It turns out I’m all thumbs.”

 

Cam laughed. “So am I.”

 

“You’ve tried to knit?” Elizabeth asked incredulously.

 

Cam grinned broadly. “My mom and aunts all do, so I thought I’d try it out. I suck. You?”

 

“My mom tried to teach me,” Elizabeth admitted. “I thought it would be a good bonding activity.”

 

“How long has it been since you’ve seen her?” Cam asked.

 

Elizabeth sighed. “Too long. I had a brief visit with her last time I was on Earth, but that seems like a long time ago now.”

 

“Tell me about it,” Cam muttered. “Mom wanted me to come home for Christmas, and I agreed, but—”

 

Elizabeth realized that Christmas on Earth had come and gone unremarked on Atlantis. The seasons here were opposite. “We missed Christmas,” she murmured.

 

“It’s easy to do when it’s not winter here,” Cam pointed out.

 

“We have plans to celebrate midsummer,” Elizabeth pointed out. “But I feel uncomfortable celebrating a Christian holiday when there are so many others of other faiths.”

 

Cam smiled. “Then we celebrate midwinter when the time comes. It seems to me that we could learn a thing or two from the Athosians.”

 

“I would agree.” Elizabeth pressed her palms against the desk. “I think I will take the rest of the afternoon off. Thanks.”

 

“Anytime,” Cam replied. “And I mean that.”

 

Elizabeth stood at the same time as Cam, and was surprised when he pulled her into a one-armed hug. After a moment’s confusion, she hugged him back, feeling the tears prick at her eyes again. “What was that for?” she asked when he released her.

 

“You looked like you needed it,” he replied.

 

Elizabeth tried not to think about how good it felt to have human contact again. “I think I did.”

 

Cam shrugged. “If you need another hug, let me know. I’m told I’m good at it.”

 

She chuckled. “You definitely are.”

 

“Take the night off,” he encouraged her. “Relax. Find a tub and some bubble bath and a book you haven’t read.”

 

That sounded better than Elizabeth wanted to admit. “I think I’ll take you up on that.”

 

“I wouldn’t have offered if I didn’t mean it,” Cam replied. “Get out of here, boss.”

 

She smiled sincerely. “Thank you, Cam.”

 

She had a bubble bath to find.


	7. Reunion

_“To be honest, I wasn’t sure we’d actually make it to Atlantis. I didn’t need to go with the old man, of course. I could have rescued his ass and stayed with Bra’tac and the Jaffa if I’d wanted to fight the Goa’uld and the Ori. But the old man was hurt worse than he’d admit, and Cassie was just a kid. I figured if they needed help, I was it.”_

 

~Interview with Jonathan Owens

 

Vala actually laughed at him when Daniel told her that he was in charge of the upcoming celebration. “You?”

 

“I know I’m not one for parties, but Elizabeth asked me to plan this,” Daniel admitted. “I need your help.”

 

“Then you have it,” Vala promised, even though an amused smile played around her lips. “What are you thinking?”

 

“There has to be entertainment of some kind,” Daniel replied a little desperately. “Do you play or sing?”

 

“Play what?” Vala asked with a smirk. “And yes, I sing.”

 

“An instrument,” Daniel replied a little desperately. “Do you play an instrument?”

 

Vala shrugged. “I play a couple, but I doubt you’ll find them here. If someone else plays an instrument, I can probably accompany them.”

 

Daniel breathed a sigh of relief. “Then you can sing.”

 

“I’m not going to be the only one entertaining people, Daniel,” Vala said with a note of alarm in her voice.

 

"So, you can get people to help you.”

 

Vala leaned back in the chair across from Daniel’s desk, her arms crossed over her chest. “Excuse me, but _I_ can get people to help? I thought Dr. Weir put you in charge.”

 

“She put _us_ in charge,” Daniel corrected her, not feeling the need to admit that he’d dragged her along with him. “And you know how bad I am at this sort of thing.”

 

Vala’s expression softened at that, and her arms dropped. “Fair enough. I’ll sing, and I’ll ask around to see if others would be willing to participate, too. Is there anything you can do?”

 

“Dig in the dirt?” Daniel suggested.

 

Vala laughed. “Besides that.”

 

“Nothing,” Daniel admitted. “I’m not talented.”

 

Vala smirked at him. “Oh, I wouldn’t say that,” she replied, rising smoothly to her feet only to straddle his lap. “You have plenty of talents.”

 

Daniel gripped her hips to keep her in place. “Do I?”

 

“ _Many_ talents,” Vala purred. “Just none I’m willing to let you demonstrate.”

 

He laughed. “But you’re up for a private demonstration?”

 

“Always.” Vala bent her head to capture his lips.

 

Daniel relaxed into her touch. “Good to know.”

 

He heard the sound of a throat clearing from the doorway of his office. “Am I interrupting something?”

 

Teyla’s voice was warm with amusement, and Daniel fought back a blush. Vala took her time moving off his lap, and Daniel hurriedly moved his chair so that his lower half was hidden by his desk.

 

Vala grinned smugly. “Teyla, it’s good to see you.”

 

“Likewise,” Teyla replied with a smile. “I believe I had an appointment with Daniel.”

 

Daniel shifted uncomfortably. “You did. I—we were going to talk about oral traditions among the Athosians.”

 

“We were,” Teyla replied. “Although I do not believe that’s what you were discussing with Vala.”

 

“No, Daniel was asking me to sing for the upcoming midsummer festival,” Vala replied. “And I promised to help him recruit others to help.”

 

Teyla smiled. “I would love to help.”

 

Daniel breathed a sigh of relief. “Really? That would be great. Do you know anyone else who would be willing to provide entertainment?”

 

“John has a guitar,” Teyla said thoughtfully. “I don’t know whether he would be willing to help, though. He’s very private. And, I know there are other Athosians who would sing some of our traditional songs.”

 

Daniel grinned. “That would be great.”

 

“Why not invite other representatives from our allies?” Teyla asked. “They might be willing to come.”

 

Daniel perked up at that. “A cultural exchange? That’s not a bad idea. I’ll have to run it by Elizabeth and Colonel Sheppard. Thanks for the idea.”

 

“I’m always happy to promote better understanding between the peoples of Pegasus and Atlantis,” Teyla said.

 

Daniel thought she was being too modest, considering that she was a big reason that Atlantis had done as well as it had over the last couple of years.

 

“I should let you two get to it,” Vala said. “I’m going to annoy Cameron.”

 

Teyla took the seat in front of Daniel’s desk once Vala had left his office. “I understand that you want to record oral histories.”

 

Daniel shrugged. “That’s part of what I do,” he explained. “Granted, most of the time I’m studying histories that have already been recorded, but I think the people in Pegasus could benefit from the opportunity to preserve their history.”

 

Teyla nodded. “There are many stories that have been lost because of the Wraith,” she admitted. “You may find it difficult to get people to talk to you, but I will facilitate if I can.”

 

“Thank you,” Daniel replied sincerely. “What do you make of the most recent culling?”

 

Her expression was grave. “There was a great deal of destruction. It concerns me, but I believe we must be grateful that the Wraith did not capture any of our people this time.”

 

“Do you think it’s possible that the Wraith worshippers know Atlantis is still here?” Daniel asked, voicing a fear that had been plaguing him over the last few days.

 

Teyla sighed. “I do not know, but I hope they do not, because it’s unlikely we’d be able to fight off one ship, let alone several.”

 

That’s what Daniel was afraid of. “And while we wait and watch, we have to continue living our lives,” he murmured.

 

Teyla nodded. “Yes, we do. We celebrate the passage of time, because too many lose their lives too soon.”

 

Daniel couldn’t help but agree. “Where would you like to start?” he asked.

 

Teyla took a deep breath and squared her shoulders. “I will tell you the story of how I came to have Wraith DNA.”

 

Daniel turned on his recorder. “One second. This is Daniel Jackson with Teyla Emmagan.” He listed the day and time, and then nodded at Teyla to continue. “Go ahead.”

 

“Many generations ago, the Wraith took some of my ancestors to another planet,” Teyla began, and Daniel settled in to listen to the story.

 

~~~~~

 

Jack watched proudly as Cassie handled the controls to the ship like a pro. They had stopped off on a planet to replenish their water stores and had done some hunting and gathering as well. Cassie had landed and taken off with minimal coaching.

 

And now, she had adjusted their course to fly straight on to Atlantis without being prompted.

 

“Good job,” Jack said quietly. “You’re really getting the hang of this, kiddo.”

 

Cassie grinned at him. “I never thought I’d get a chance to fly a ship.”

 

“You’re a natural,” Jack replied. “You’ve done really well.”

 

She shrugged. “Well, maybe if I can’t be a doctor, I’ll fly spaceships.”

 

“You can do whatever you want to,” Jack said. “There are a lot of smart people on Atlantis, and I’ll bet they’d be willing to teach you whatever they can.”

 

Cassie stared out into space. “Do you ever think we’ll go back?”

 

“Back to Earth?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“I don’t know,” Jack replied, wishing he had a better answer. “I want to tell you that we will, but they were smart about taking over. There are no guarantees.”

 

“There aren’t any guarantees in life,” Cassie murmured. “That’s what Mom always said.”

 

“Your mom was a wise woman.” Jack checked the readout. “We don’t know what’s going on with Atlantis, so let’s keep the cloak on and maintain radio silence.”

 

“How are we going to know if it’s still around?” Cassie asked.

 

“We’ll call when we get a little closer,” Jack replied.

 

In truth, Jack wasn’t anxious to find out that SG-1 hadn’t made it to Atlantis. Granted, there was a decent chance they had, and he was only prolonging his anxiety, but—

 

He didn’t want to be on Atlantis if Daniel and Sam weren’t there. It was bad enough that they’d had to leave Teal’c behind.

 

“You know, if we just called, they might be able to tell us that Daniel and Sam are there already.”

 

Sometimes, Cassie was too perceptive for her own good.

 

“They might,” Jack admitted. “But we’re not within radio distance yet.”

 

“Putting it off for as long as you can?” Jon asked from behind Jack.

 

“Wouldn’t you?” he countered.

 

His clone smirked at him. “Of course I would. That’s why you don’t hear me arguing.”

 

“I just want to wait until we’re closer,” Jack said defensively.

 

“We can wait,” Cassie assured him soothingly. “We’ve got another day at least.”

 

Jon patted Cassie on the shoulder. “You should get some sleep. It’s my shift.”

 

Cassie released the controls with obvious reluctance. “You’ll wake me up if there’s any kind of change, right?”

 

“We will,” Jack promised.

 

“And you won’t kill each other?” Cassie pressed.

 

Jack glanced at his clone, who shrugged. “We’ll play nice,” Jon promised.

 

Cassie nodded. “See that you do.”

 

“How many teams do you think made it?” Jack asked quietly.

 

“Fewer than you sent out,” Jon replied, his tone matching Jack’s. “You know I’m not going to be able to stay on Atlantis long term.”

 

Jack frowned. “What are you talking about?”

 

“Things are already pretty fucking weird,” Jon pointed out. “If I stay on Atlantis, it’s just going to get weirder.”

 

“Where were you thinking about going?” Jack asked.

 

Jon smiled slightly. “Back to the Jaffa, maybe back to Earth. You need intel; you need to know exactly what’s going on. I figure I can give you that.”

 

Jack wanted to argue, but that would have been like arguing with himself. Jon had Jack’s knowledge and the body of an eighteen year old. If anyone could gather intelligence and come through unscathed, it was his clone.

 

“It’s going to take some time to come up with a strategy,” Jack warned him.

 

“Not that much time,” Jon responded. “But I’m willing to wait a little while.”

 

Jack thought for a minute. “You’re not going alone. That’s just stupid.”

 

“Wouldn’t be the first time I’ve done something stupid,” Jon countered.

 

“Yeah, but there’s no point sending you for more intel if you’re just going to wind up dead or in a Goa’uld holding cell,” Jack countered. “And let’s face it, if you go back to Earth, there are going to be people you’ll need to get off the planet, people like Cassie. That means supplies and transportation.”

 

Jon patted the console. “I’ve got transportation.”

 

Jack glared at him. “Teal’c gave the ship to me, you know.”

 

Jon smirked. “Doesn’t that mean he technically gave it to _us_?”

 

“I think we can both agree we’re not the same person,” Jack countered. “But the ship might be available.”

 

Jon glanced at him. “You realize that if we can’t take back Earth, our best bet will be to start forming an underground railroad of sorts.”

 

“You mean, a way to get people off Earth and to Atlantis.”

 

“Or some other planet.” Jon sighed. “Look, I know you were pretty much out of it, but whoever’s behind this, they’ve got a stranglehold on Earth’s government.”

 

Jack nodded. “I know it. If we could make sure all the friendly Jaffa were off the planet and release that toxin that killed the Goa’uld….”

 

“Don’t you think they’ll destroy that first thing?” Jon countered.

 

“I would, but the Goa’uld are arrogant sons of bitches,” Jack pointed out. “We should try to find some at least.”

 

Jon nodded. “I’ll make that my priority. Would Atlantis have a record of the chemical compound?”

 

Jack shook his head. “That information was kept secret, and it was on a separate server at the SGC. We didn’t want it used against our Jaffa allies.”

 

“Makes sense,” Jon replied. “Look, you should get some sleep. You’re still healing, and you’re going to need to be on the top of your game when we get to Atlantis.”

 

Understanding hit Jack all at once. “You don’t want to be on Atlantis because of Sam.”

 

The muscle in Jon’s jaw jumped. “Not _just_ because of Sam. It’s easier to forget who I—who I _was_ if I’m not surrounded by reminders all the time. And yeah, Daniel and Sam are pretty big reminders. They both look at me like I’m some kid.”

 

“You _are_ a kid,” Jack countered. “And be grateful for it, because your knees aren’t giving out on you.”

 

Jon smirked. “There’s something to be said for not being an old man.”

 

“Let me know if you need anything,” Jack said.

 

“Go to sleep, old man,” Jon replied. “I’ll be fine.”

 

Jack knew there were a few levels to that assurance, and he knew Jon was one person he couldn’t protect.

 

Hell, there were a lot of people he couldn’t protect, but he knew how stubborn he could be. Jon wasn’t going to back.

 

And his clone was right; having him on the city was just going to be awkward. Maybe this was the best way to deal with it.

 

~~~~~

 

Sam sighed deeply when her radio crackled. She was in the middle of a promising simulation, and she didn’t want to take a break. Since she was scheduled for an off-world trip later that day, she had a limited amount of time to finish.

 

The radios were a lot more difficult to ignore than the intercoms at the SGC had been, though, and even if she wasn’t the one on duty, she still felt a certain responsibility to stay on top of calls.

 

Sam tapped her radio and said, “Yeah?”

 

“Dr. Carter, we’ve just received a transmission from General O’Neill,” Elizabeth replied. “He should be landing within the hour.”

 

Sam reached for a chair. “Wait, what? Jack?”

 

“General O’Neill is piloting a _tel’tak_ ,” Elizabeth said. “He has Cassandra Frasier and Jonathan Owens with him.”

 

“Are you sure it’s him?” Sam asked, almost too afraid to hope.

 

“I’m sure,” Elizabeth replied. “He had details of the message we were sent that only General O’Neill would know.”

 

Sam took a deep, steadying breath. “Where is he going to be landing?”

 

“There’s a space cleared on the east pier,” Elizabeth told her. “I can call when he’s closer, or—”

 

“I’ll meet the ship there,” Sam said quickly. There was no way she’d be able to focus on anything else right now. She might as well pace the east pier, rather than her lab.

 

“That’s your choice, Sam. I imagine there’s going to be a crowd eventually.”

 

Sam made a noncommittal noise and ended the connection. Maybe there would be a crowd, but as long as she had a front row seat, she didn’t care.

 

Jack was alive; she couldn’t quite believe it.

 

The radio squawked again, and Daniel said, “Sam? Did you hear?”

 

“Yeah,” she managed.

 

“Where are you?”

 

“My lab, but I’m heading for the pier,” she replied.

 

“Meet you there,” Daniel promised.

 

Sam carefully closed down her work, and with the little presence of mind that remained, called McKay. “Rodney, I’m not going to be able to go on the mission today.”

 

“Of course not,” McKay said brusquely. “I’ve already asked Miko to take your place.”

 

Sam had no idea whether McKay had figured that out on his own, or if Elizabeth had given the order, but she supposed it didn’t matter.

 

Daniel was waiting for her on the pier when she arrived, and he immediately wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “Are you okay?”

 

“I’m okay,” Sam insisted, but she could hear the hitch in her voice as the emotion threatened to overwhelm her. “Really.”

 

Daniel left his arm where it was, and Sam leaned against him. After a few minutes, Vala flanked her, tucking her arm through Sam’s. Cam was on the other side of Vala, standing just a little apart.

 

“Cameron,” Vala said sweetly. “Get over here.”

 

Cam rolled his eyes, but he closed the distance. Vala patted him on the arm. “Daniel, have you asked Cam to help yet?”

 

“Asked me to help with what?” Cam asked, sounding suspicious.

 

“Entertainment for the midsummer party Dr. Weir asked me to plan,” Daniel replied.

 

Sam snorted, and Cam laughed outright. “Elizabeth asked _you_ to plan a party? Seriously?”

 

“If you’d like to take over, feel free,” Daniel replied, sounding a little sour. “No one told her that I was really bad at that kind of thing.”

 

“Now, Daniel, I already said I’d help,” Vala reminded him. “And I’m really very good. So, Cam, can you entertain?”

 

“Hearing me sing wouldn’t do much for your guests,” Cam replied. “I’m not the person to ask.” He hesitated. “But I’ve got a few of my mom’s recipes she always made for big family reunions. I don’t know that we’d have the ingredients, but—”

 

“Check with Corporal Dawson,” Daniel said. “I need to talk to her about food anyway. We might be able to come up with what you need before the party.”

 

Vala smiled, looking inordinately pleased with herself. “There, you see, Daniel? It’s not so bad. Sam?”

 

Sam shook her head. “Sorry. I don’t think I can help much.”

 

“Think about it,” Vala said firmly. “Otherwise, I’ll put you on the decorating committee.”

 

That didn’t sound too bad to Sam; she’d prefer to help with decorations given her other options.

 

“So, you’re in charge now,” Daniel said with relief.

 

Vala smirked. “You wish. No, I’m helping, and I’m saving us all from a very boring party.”

 

Sam suspected that Vala knew exactly what she was doing—distracting Sam and Daniel from Jack’s imminent arrival.

 

Time ticked by, and others joined them on the pier, including Elizabeth and Sheppard. “I thought you’d reroute General O’Neill to the alpha site,” Cam said.

 

“Not this time,” Elizabeth replied. “We’ll scan them when they arrive, and we’ve got Marines on standby, but General O’Neill has the coordinates for the city. It’s no more dangerous to let them land than it would be to reroute them.”

 

“Plus, the general knew details of the message he sent that no one else would,” Sheppard added. “The risk is worth taking, and it was my call to make.”

 

“No question,” Cam agreed. “Definitely your call.”

 

Sheppard smirked and leaned on his crutches.

 

Sam finally heard the rumble of a ship coming in for a landing, but her heart was beating so loudly, she could barely hear the thrusters over her own pulse pounding.

 

She had no idea if the fragile thing between them had survived the time and distance that had separated them. She didn’t know if Jack would be the same, or if she was the same, or if they would fit together anymore.

 

And in one sense it didn’t matter, because they would always be family, but she had loved him for so long that the fear of getting him back, only to lose him on another level, had her heart in her throat.

 

Daniel’s arm was tight around her shoulders, and Vala’s arm through hers gave her ballast, and the _tel’tak_ landed with a rumble.

 

The hatch opened, and her heart was in her throat. Sam stood frozen as the hatch opened slowly. Sam saw a pair of feet in leather boots first, and then Jack emerged, limping. He paused at the foot of the ramp, and Sam stood frozen until Daniel gave her a push forward.

 

Sam could never remember crossing the distance. One moment, she was stumbling ahead, off-balance from Daniel’s gentle nudge, the next moment, Jack had his arms around her, burying his face in her hair, holding her so tightly, she was pulled up to her tiptoes.

 

Jack smelled a little rank, but she knew she hadn’t smelled much fresher when they’d arrived on Atlantis. She didn’t care; God, she didn’t care, because Jack’s strong arms were holding her tightly, and he was whispering, “Oh, God, Carter.”

 

She wasn’t ready to release him when he pulled back, but he did so just so he could pull Daniel into a tight hug. And then Sam saw Cassie, and she pulled the girl into a tight embrace.

 

“Sam!” Cassie said, her arms tight around Sam’s waist.

 

Sam pressed a kiss to the top of Cassie’s head. “I’m glad to see you, although I’m sorry you had to leave Earth.”

 

Cassie pulled back to give her a tremulous smile. “I’m not. My family is all here.”

 

Sam gave her another hug, and then released her so that Daniel could pull Cassie into his arms, leaving her to turn back to Jack, who wrapped an arm around Sam’s shoulders, reaching out a hand to grab Cam’s left hand.

 

“What happened?” Jack asked him.

 

“Long story,” Cam replied.

 

Jack nodded. “Yeah, I’ve got a few of those myself.” He smiled at Vala. “Thanks for taking such good care of my team.”

 

Vala beamed at him. “It’s good to see you in one piece, General.”

 

“Well, I’ve got a few cracks, but I’m in one piece,” he replied. “Dr. Weir, I’m sure you have your own checks you want to run.”

 

“Colonel Sheppard?” Elizabeth prompted, deferring to him.

 

Sheppard nodded. “If it’s all right with you, General, we’ll run the scan for Goa’ulds here, and then let you all get checked out by Dr. Beckett.”

 

“It’s your show,” Jack replied.

 

Sam caught sight of a young man hanging back, and she blinked. “Jack, is that—”

 

“Ah, yeah,” Jack replied. “Sam, Daniel, everybody, meet Jonathan Owens. He helped me get out.”

 

Sam recognized Jack’s clone immediately, and she felt that same mixture of recognition and bemusement when she saw him now. Up until a couple of years ago, when their lives had diverged, Jack and his clone had identical memories, and identical life stories. And now—

 

“It’s Jon,” he said, holding out a hand. “It’s nice to see you again, Daniel, Sam.”

 

Sam took her cue from him and shook his hand. “Same here. Thanks for helping Jack.”

 

Jon shrugged after he’d shaken Daniel’s hand. “Thank Teal’c and Cassie. They were the ones who found me.”

 

“Still,” Sam said. “Thanks.”

 

Jon nodded, his expression serious and his dark eyes—so like Jack’s—very intense. “Just doing what I had to.”

 

Sheppard swung himself forward and ran the scanner himself, finally declaring all of the newcomers clear. “You’re good,” he said. “Have Carson look you over, and I’ll get our quartermaster to find you guys rooms.”

 

Sam cleared her throat, and glanced at Jack, grateful to see his nod. “John, just two extra rooms.”

 

Sheppard smiled. “Got it. Let Stackhouse know if you need anything. General, if you’re okay with it, I’ll have the engineering team go over your ship.”

 

“Feel free,” Jack replied. “Thank you, Colonel.”

 

Sheppard nodded. “Welcome to Atlantis, guys. Let us know if you need—well, whatever.”

 

Sam kept her arm around Jack’s waist as they made their slow way to the infirmary. She could hear Daniel speaking with Cassie behind them, and she glanced over her shoulder to see Vala walking on Cassie’s other side, and Cam engaging Jon in conversation.

 

“Looks like you’ve got a long story,” Sam murmured.

 

“No longer than yours,” Jack replied. “God, Carter, I’m sorry. Teal’c told me what happened, and I—”

 

“Don’t,” she said, cutting him off. “I know you would have sent help if you could. You never would have left us hanging if there was another choice.”

 

“I could have left Earth myself,” Jack replied. “Maybe I should have. I thought I could hold their attention long enough that—”

 

“Don’t,” she repeated. “Jack, I’m just glad you’re here.”

 

He pressed his lips to her hair. “Yeah, so am I, Sam.”

 

“Did Teal’c pick Cassie up before or after he rescued you?” she asked.

 

“Before,” Jack replied. “Good thing, too. She picked up a lot more from Janet than I’d thought.”

 

“She always was a smart kid.”

 

“Yeah, she was.” Jack pulled her closer yet. “You kept me sane.”

 

Sam blinked back the threatening tears. “I wasn’t there.”

 

“You were,” Jack said. “More than you know.”

 

Sam smiled, too happy to do anything else.

 

~~~~~

 

Vala had met General O’Neill very briefly on one occasion, but from what she’d heard, it was very like him to remember her. And it was like Teal’c to credit her with more than she’d probably done, all things considered.

 

She was incredibly grateful that Teal’c was safe, or had been when O’Neill had parted ways with him, and she was thrilled that Sam and Daniel were so happy.

 

Every person who made it to Atlantis represented a small victory.

 

“So, anyway, by the time Teal’c found me,” Cassie was saying, “I could tell that someone was watching me, you know? I was ready to leave.”

 

Daniel gave Cassie a hug. “That was very brave.”

 

Cassie shrugged off the praise. “It was kind of a no-brainer, Daniel.”

 

He laughed. “Yeah, I guess it would be. How were things on Earth when you left?”

 

Cassie shrugged. “A little weird. There were all these rumors going around about restrictions on movement, and people disappearing.”

 

“Bad?” Daniel asked.

 

“I don’t know,” Cassie admitted. “Some of it might have just been the conspiracy theorists talking, you know? But I think some of it was real.”

 

“How bad was Jack when you found him?” Daniel asked in a low voice.

 

Cassie’s young face was set and worried. “Bad. They really worked him over, and they hadn’t put him in the sarcophagus.”

 

Vala saw the alarm on Daniel’s face as he asked, “Sarcophagus?”

 

“They’d only used it once or twice,” Cassie assured him. “Jack didn’t have any kind of withdrawal symptoms.”

 

Vala knew the side effects that using the sarcophagus could bring on. Even though it could speed healing, it wasn’t worth it unless it was a one-time use to save someone’s life.

 

“How is he now?” Daniel asked.

 

Cassie shook her head. “Unless your doctors here have a better treatment, I think he’s about as healed as he’s going to get.”

 

Vala trailed them into the infirmary, seeing Dr. Lam hugging the general. “All right, let’s get you checked out so you can get cleaned up,” she said with a grin that lit up her whole face.

 

Between Dr. Beckett, Dr. Lam, and the rest of the infirmary staff, they had the new arrivals cleared in an hour. Daniel and Sam hovered near O’Neill’s bed, which meant that Vala stuck around, too.

 

Vala overheard Jon—as he insisted he be called—say, “You should probably know that my DNA is going to be a near-match for O’Neill’s.”

 

“And is there a reason for that?” Beckett asked.

 

Jon shrugged. “I’m a clone. The report was sealed for obvious reasons.”

 

“I’ll make a note of it,” Beckett replied. “You’ll let me know if you experience any related problems.”

 

“I haven’t had any trouble for two years,” Jon said. “I doubt it’s going to happen now.”

 

Sheppard swung himself into the infirmary. “Hey, the doc told me you guys were cleared. Stackhouse should be delivering some clean clothing to your quarters now, but I thought I’d do the honors.”

 

“Thank you, Colonel,” O’Neill replied. “I appreciate the warm welcome.”

 

“We’re just happy to see you mostly in one piece, sir,” Sheppard replied, leading the way out of the infirmary. “But I’m sorry that more teams haven’t made it yet.”

 

Jack sighed. “We ran across one on our way. I think they got caught up by an Ori plague.”

 

“Shit,” Sam cursed. “How many?”

 

“Five,” Jack replied. “But we didn’t check every world where teams might have been caught.”

 

“You couldn’t,” Cam replied. “Carrie said that things got pretty hairy.”

 

O’Neill nodded. “I’ll want to hear the whole story.”

 

“I’ll set up a room to debrief,” Sheppard promised. “Will tomorrow be soon enough for you?”

 

“Oh, I think so,” O’Neill said.

 

Sheppard nodded. “Sam knows where the conference room is. I’ll tell Dr. Lam and the others to make themselves available at 0900. Until then, feel free to wander, or if you want a tour, I can assign someone.” He grimaced. “Unfortunately, with this leg, I can’t do it myself. Carson is probably going to yell at me as it is.”

 

Vala smirked, suspecting that it wouldn’t be Beckett giving Sheppard an earful. More than likely, McKay or Teyla would read Sheppard the riot act.

 

“And here we are,” Sheppard said. “Cassie, Stackhouse put you right down the hall from Sam and Vala. I’m afraid all we’ve got right now are uniforms, so you’re going to be stuck with that.”

 

“That’s okay,” Cassie said. “I don’t mind.”

 

“No big deal,” Jon agreed.

 

Sheppard nodded. “I’ll leave you to it. Major Lorne should be able to help you with anything you need, if I’m not available, or you can ask for Stackhouse.”

 

They all stood in the hallway, staring at each other, for a long moment after Sheppard disappeared down the hallway.

 

“Well, I don’t know about anybody else, but I’m dying for a shower,” Jon said. “See you guys later.”

 

He disappeared into the room Sheppard had indicated would be his, and Cassie blew out a breath. “Yeah, me too.”

 

“We’ll swing by to grab you for dinner in an hour,” Daniel offered. “If you’re hungry.”

 

“Starving,” Cassie admitted cheerfully. She gave Sam and Daniel another hug each. “It’s really great to see you guys again.”

 

Vala watched as Daniel met O’Neill’s eyes, and then Sam’s. “We’ll have plenty of time to get caught up,” Daniel said, looking back at O’Neill. “Join us for dinner if you want, or I can get somebody to send you a meal in your quarters.”

 

O’Neill glanced at Sam, looking a little nervous. “Yeah. We’ll let you know.”

 

“I won’t knock too loudly,” Daniel promised.

 

O’Neill looked at Cam, who was shifting from foot to foot and looking as though he felt entirely out of place. “Thanks for taking care of them, Mitchell.”

 

Cam’s right arm twitched in its sling, and Vala felt a pang of sympathy. Cam couldn’t salute now, having to settle for standing at attention and nodding. “I think it was more the other way around, sir.”

 

“Yeah, but still,” O’Neill replied, putting an arm around Sam’s shoulders. “Thanks.”

 

And then they both disappeared inside Sam’s quarters, and Vala was left standing in the hallway with Daniel and Cam. Daniel smiled, but Cam still seemed unhappy, and more than a little uncomfortable.

 

Vala grabbed Cam’s good arm. “Come along, Cameron.”

 

“Where are we going?” he protested.

 

“Ronon promised he’d show me some knife-throwing tricks,” Vala replied. “You can learn right alongside me. You, too, Daniel.”

 

Cam pulled away. “In case it’s escaped your notice, _Vala_ , I’m not going to be throwing knives any time soon.”

 

“Not with your right hand,” she agreed. “But that doesn’t mean your left hand is broken. Come on, let’s go.”

 

“I wouldn’t argue with her,” Daniel advised, following them down the hall. “She usually gets her way.”

 

Cam scowled. “I can see that.”

 

“Oh, come on,” Vala coaxed. “It will be fun! And we might not always have access to bullets, so it behooves all of us to be able to use knives—at least until McKay manages to duplicate Ronon’s blaster. Have you seen it? I like it better than the zat.”

 

Vala chattered on, feeling the tension leave Cam’s frame as they walked, grateful that she could do that much to help him.

 

Really, Cam had been allowed to wallow in self-pity just a bit too long. Although she knew that Elizabeth’s offer of work had helped, Cam would never be happy staying out of the field, and his obvious disability meant that enemies were likely to underestimate him.

 

And the sooner Cam figured that out, the better.

 

~~~~~

 

Cam was surprised at how much he enjoyed the knife-throwing lesson with Ronon. Using his left hand still felt awkward, but he was slowly growing used to it. Ronon had been unexpectedly patient, teaching Cam how to balance a knife, and to flick it at the target.

 

By the time they’d called an end to the lesson, Cam was hitting the target every time, even if he couldn’t hit the bull’s-eye yet.

 

“You’ll get there,” Ronon said, clapping Cam on the shoulder so hard he stumbled slightly.

 

“Thanks,” Cam managed.

 

Ronon gave him a wolfish grin. “Any time.”

 

Of course, Jackson had done worse than Cam with his dominant hand, and that helped Cam’s mood considerably.

 

“I think it’s dinnertime,” Vala announced. “Daniel, maybe you should collect Cassie and Jon. I’d leave Sam and General O’Neill alone.”

 

Jackson smiled. “And you would know.”

 

Vala smiled sweetly. “I would, so you should listen to me.”

 

Cam felt a bit like a fifth wheel. When Jackson and Vala had started up a relationship, he’d still had Sam. And, while he didn’t begrudge Sam or O’Neill their happiness, he felt more than a bit at loose ends.

 

And Cam had to wonder what the hell he was supposed to do now. Judging from O’Neill’s injuries, he wouldn’t be capable of fieldwork, and he was a logical choice for an alternate to Elizabeth. Cam didn’t know where he fit in to all of this.

 

It was too early to worry about it; he knew that. Cam knew enough to recognize how much there was to do on Atlantis and around Pegasus, and Sheppard had been right: Atlantis needed every warm body.

 

Cam just wasn’t sure that he could be one of those warm bodies.

 

Vala sat down across from Cam. “What’s going through your mind?” she asked.

 

Cam shook his head. “I’m not sure you want to know.”

 

“We’re friends, aren’t we?” Vala asked. “Of course I want to know.”

 

“What is O’Neill going to do?” Cam asked, unable to keep the doubt from his tone. “He’s a much better candidate to be Elizabeth’s alternate than I am.”

 

Vala’s expression was unexpectedly sympathetic. “You want to be out in the field.”

 

“I’m a pilot, Vala,” Cam replied. “Sitting behind a desk is just not for me.”

 

Vala reached out to grip his hand. “Okay, so you do it for a little while before you find something else,” she countered. “Just give it time.”

 

“You worried about me?” Cam countered with a smile, trying not to show how much her concern touched him.

 

Vala squeezed his hand. “Cam, I worry about everyone on my team, you included.”

 

“But you worry about me more?” Cam countered.

 

Vala smiled. “I wouldn’t say _more_ , but right now, you’re in a tougher position than anyone else.”

 

“Thanks,” Cam replied darkly. “That’s a huge relief.”

 

“There’s no shame in admitting the truth,” Vala countered. “Right now, you’re at a disadvantage, but you know that’s not always going to be true after today.”

 

Cam nodded. “Yeah, I know.”

 

“So?” Vala prompted. “Just do what you’d normally do, then. The right opportunity will present itself.”

 

Cam might have tried to argue, but he couldn’t come up with anything. “You’re right,” he finally acknowledged. “Thanks, Vala.”

 

“I’ve got your back.”

 

“I know,” he replied. “And I appreciate that.”

 

Vala looked up to smile at Jackson as he took the seat next to her. “I don’t see Sam or the general,” she observed.

 

“I’ll take them a tray after dinner,” Jackson replied. “They deserve this night.” He smiled wryly. “As much as I missed Jack, I think Sam missed him more.”

 

Cam watched with envy as Vala touched Jackson’s cheek. He wasn’t sure he was in the best place to have a relationship, but he wouldn’t have minded trying.

 

Cassie sat down next to Daniel, and Jon took the seat next to Cam. “So,” Jon said. “What do you guys do for fun around here?”

 

~~~~~

 

Jack wasn’t surprised when Sam joined him in the shower, and he was grateful for her help scrubbing his back and soaping up his hair. He’d had a few weeks to heal now, but his ribs still pulled, and his collarbone still twinged. Beckett might have cleared him, but he’d been frank about Jack’s prognosis.

 

“You had far too many broken bones not to feel them,” Beckett had said. “I’m sorry, General O’Neill, but I don’t think there’s anything I can do for you without rebreaking bones, and I don’t recommend it.”

 

“I wouldn’t allow it,” Jack had replied, and that had been that.

 

Sam didn’t seem to mind lending a helping hand, though, and Jack thought he could probably get used to the treatment. After they’d both dried off, Jack let Sam take the lead, and she moved slowly and carefully, her forehead resting against his, her breasts brushing against his chest.

 

She was so beautiful, her warmth so welcome, that Jack easily lost himself in her touch, in the way she leaned over him and brushed his lips with hers. She surrounded him with heat, trailing kisses over his neck and collarbone, everywhere she could reach while she rode him.

 

Jack rested his hands on her hips and groaned softly as his orgasm overtook him. “God, I missed you, Carter.”

 

“I missed _you_ ,” she replied, her voice soft but full of meaning. “You don’t know how much.”

 

“I can guess,” he countered, running a hand through her hair. “Memories of you kept me sane.”

 

Sam offered a sympathetic smile, and he knew she understood. That was the thing about her, and about the rest of his team. They didn’t need to ask questions, because they knew he’d talk when he was ready, just like he wouldn’t ask them questions until they were ready.

 

“It’s probably close to dinner time,” Sam said, stretching out next to him after she’d used the bathroom and cleaned up a bit.

 

“Don’t let me stop you,” Jack said.

 

Sam rested her forehead against his shoulder. “I’m not going anywhere without you, not yet.”

 

There was a knock on the door, and Sam patted his chest. “Stay put. I’ll take care of it.”

 

She called, “Just a sec!” as she pulled on her pants and a t-shirt, sans underwear. If Jack hadn’t been so tired and so old, he might have been up for round two.

 

Sam blocked their visitor with her body, but Jack heard Daniel’s voice, and he smiled as he heard Daniel say, “So, I take it you’d prefer if I brought you a sandwich.”

 

“Thanks, Daniel,” Sam said gratefully. “Whatever you can bring would be great.”

 

“Just tell Jack that I want a full hour of his time tomorrow.”

 

“Breakfast,” Sam promised. “Say 0800?”

 

“It’s a date,” Daniel replied. “I’ll drop dinner by in an hour or two.”

 

“Thanks,” Sam said, gratitude in her tone.

 

Jack called out, “Thank you, Danny!” He did it just to mess with Daniel, knowing that Daniel hated to think of him and Sam together, even if he _knew_ they were together.

 

Daniel let out a strangled sound before he said, “Yeah, okay. I’ll leave a tray outside the door.”

 

Sam lay back down on the bed next to Jack, leaving her clothes on. Jack immediately put a hand on her hip, his fingers finding the smooth skin under her shirt, just above her waistband.

 

“Are you really up for another round?” Sam asked with a grin.

 

Jack groaned. “I only wish. Twenty years ago, maybe, but not now.”

 

“Good thing I like older you,” Sam teased.

 

Jack’s smile faltered. “Sam—”

 

“I love you,” she said quietly. “I missed you. The rest will sort itself out.”

 

Jack wanted to take her word for it, and tonight that would have to be enough. Maybe it wouldn’t always be, but he couldn’t afford to borrow trouble, not now.

 

“Come here,” he replied, holding an arm out to gather her close. “I’m glad you made it.”

 

“Same here,” Sam whispered, and pushed her face into Jack’s neck. “So very glad.”

 

Right now, that was all he needed to know.


	8. The Razor's Edge

_“The problem with having people you care about is that you have ties you can’t just sever. A lot of the people on Atlantis from the second wave had friends and family on Earth they couldn’t abandon, but for those of us who had been on Atlantis for a while, we didn’t like the idea of leaving the city or our friends there, either. So, when we first started talking about taking a recon team back to Earth, I wanted to be on it—but the truth was that I had Laro, and he was the best thing that had ever happened to me. It put me in a tough position.”_

 

~Interview with Evan Lorne

 

Ladon Radim stepped through the gate, and Elizabeth felt the tension in the room ratchet up. After the attack on M7G-677, no one was predisposed to like the Genii—of any stripe. The Marines in the gate room didn’t chamber a round, but the click of safeties being disengaged was fairly obvious.

 

Elizabeth inclined her head graciously, hoping her offered courtesy would outweigh the obvious distrust.

 

Not that she didn’t feel the same level of suspicion, but she preferred to play good cop to John’s bad cop. “Ladon, it’s good to see you,” she said with a smile.

 

Ladon arched an eyebrow and glanced at the Marines stationed around the gate room. “I’m sure.”

 

“Why don’t you come into my office?” Elizabeth suggested.

 

Ladon followed her up the stairs, and into her office. “I have more recent information about Kolya’s whereabouts,” Ladon said once the door had closed behind him. “I wanted to tell you personally.”

 

“I appreciate that,” Elizabeth said evenly.

 

Ladon smiled thinly. “Kolya is my problem, too, you know.”

 

“I know,” Elizabeth replied, her tone intentionally dry. “What do you have for us?”

 

Ladon pushed a piece of paper across her desk with a gate address scribbled on it. “All of my intelligence points to that planet as one of Kolya’s strongholds. I can’t promise that he or his people are here, but I can promise you that he was. With your technology, you might find other clues to go on even if he’s left.”

 

“Good,” Elizabeth replied, keeping a neutral expression. “This helps.”

 

“We _do_ want to catch Kolya,” Ladon said, obviously catching what she didn’t say.

 

Elizabeth smiled thinly. “Trust is earned, Ladon. If this pans out, you’ll go a long way towards earning it.”

 

“The reason I’m giving this to you is because I know you’ll come if we call you regarding the Wraith,” Ladon countered. “Whatever Kolya might say, you’re an honorable people, Dr. Weir.”

 

“I’d like to think so,” she replied, keeping her temper with some effort. She suspected that Ladon was using them in order to get rid of Kolya, who was likely to present as much of a problem with the Genii as he was to Atlantis and its allies.

 

Elizabeth reminded herself that anger would get her nowhere. “I’ll present the information to Colonel Sheppard and the rest of my team,” she replied. “Thank you.”

 

She couldn’t be certain, but she thought Ladon was disappointed with her lack of response, and she motioned to the Marine who had remained outside the door to escort Ladon out.

 

Elizabeth stared at the scrap of paper. John wasn’t going to be happy about this; he still wasn’t cleared for duty, and he was very much of the mindset that he wouldn’t send anyone to do a dangerous mission that he couldn’t undertake himself.

 

The knock on the door surprised her out of her reverie, and she looked up to see Carson. “Is this a bad time?” he asked.

 

A glance at the clock told her that Carson was actually several minutes late for their meeting. “No, not at all. I was just thinking.”

 

“I heard you had a visitor this morning,” Carson replied.

 

“News travels fast.”

 

“It’s a very large city, with a relatively small population,” Carson countered. “What did Ladon want?”

 

“He claims to have information about Kolya’s whereabouts,” Elizabeth replied. “I distrust his motives.”

 

Carson looked a little grim. “I would say you should always distrust the Genii’s motives.” Coming from Carson, that was quite the censure.

 

“How is Colonel Sheppard?” Elizabeth asked.

 

John had spiked a fever the day after General O’Neill’s arrival. Rodney had noticed that John wasn’t feeling well, and had sicced Carson on him, and Carson had chivvied him back to the infirmary.

 

“The new antibiotics seem to be taking care of it,” Carson admitted. “I’m keeping him in the infirmary under light sedation now. He’s been in and out of it.”

 

Elizabeth heaved a sigh of relief. They were in a better position now, with Lorne as a capable second-in-command, and General O’Neill to provide advice and assistance, but Atlantis still couldn’t afford to lose John.

 

“And General O’Neill?” she asked.

 

Carson shook his head. “Considering the rough treatment he had, the general is doing remarkably well. His scans indicated that he had numerous broken ribs, a broken collarbone, and what looks to be a skull fracture.”

 

“But?” Elizabeth prompted.

 

“Quite frankly, I doubt he’s going to be fit for fieldwork again, at least not under circumstances that will put a strain on his body,” Carson replied, his blue eyes troubled. “He needs to have his left knee replaced, and his right knee is going to require the same in five years or so.”

 

Elizabeth raised an eyebrow. “You’re saying he should have a desk job.”

 

“That would be ideal, yes,” Carson admitted. “Not that there really is such a thing on Atlantis,” he added with a wry grin.

 

Elizabeth nodded her agreement. “Good. I’ll be down to visit him when I can. Have you spoken to Corporal Dawson yet?”

 

Carson nodded, running a hand over stubbled cheeks. “I explained her options, and told her we would support any decision she made. She wants to go through with the pregnancy.”

 

Elizabeth hadn’t expected anything else, although she’d wanted to be sure that Dawson had every option available, and Carson was comfortable performing a host of medical procedures, including abortions if necessary.

 

“What about the retrovirus?” Elizabeth asked, moving to the next point on the agenda.

 

Carson heaved a weary sigh. “To be honest, Elizabeth, I’m still stuck on how to disperse it. Aerosol delivery would be best, but actually getting it on a Hive ship is something else altogether. And we’ve been entirely too busy trying to find ways to restock medications to do much work on the retrovirus.”

 

“And when we need the retrovirus, we’ll _really_ need it, but until then, we need other drugs more,” Elizabeth supplied.

 

“That’s the long and short of it,” Carson replied. “Plus, we’d need to test it before we could rely on its effectiveness.”

 

Elizabeth took a deep breath, knowing that her next request was not going to please Carson. “What about another method of protection against the Wraith?”

 

Carson straightened. “What were you thinking?”

 

“Earth discovered a poison effective against the Goa’uld and their larvae. If Wraith and human physiology is so different, then would it be possible to create a poison that affects only Wraith?”

 

Carson’s eyes widened. “You’re asking me to commit genocide. I should dismiss the suggestion out of hand.”

 

Elizabeth waited out the initial shock, keeping her expression impassive.

 

“But since it’s the Wraith,” Carson said with a sigh. “I don’t know.”

 

“We don’t have any help coming from Earth,” Elizabeth said, knowing when to press her advantage, even if she hated asking the question. “If the Wraith make it onto the city, our only choice will be the self-destruct, and that has its own set of problems.”

 

Carson nodded. “We can’t afford to lose the city. I’m aware.” He rubbed his eyes. “I’ll see what I can do. For what it’s worth, I agree with you. I think we’ll be better off focusing our energies on a defensive weapon anyway. Even if we were able to transform Wraith into humans, we wouldn’t know what to do with them, assuming they survive.”

 

“A big assumption,” Elizabeth murmured.

 

Carson rose. “I’ll do what I can—amidst all the other things demanding my attention. I’ll let you know.”

 

Elizabeth let it go, knowing that Carson would think about it, and only then did she rest her head in her hands. She hated to ask for this sort of thing from Carson—she hated to think about the possibility of wiping out an entire species.

 

But the Wraith would kill them all if they didn’t need humans for food; Elizabeth had no delusions about that.

 

Killing them wouldn’t hurt her feelings in the slightest.

 

~~~~~

 

“Do you think it’s a good plan?”

 

Laro’s voice sounded a little anxious, and Evan wrapped his arm around Laro’s shoulders reassuringly. “I think it’s a great plan,” Evan replied. “And I think you should go with me to the meeting with Dr. Weir.”

 

“If you’re sure,” Laro replied. “I’m a potter, not a soldier. I cannot pretend to understand your needs.”

 

“I think you understand our needs just fine,” Evan replied, pressing a kiss to Laro’s lips. “Don’t worry so much.”

 

A shadow passed over Laro’s face. “I have lost nearly everyone I care about. I will do everything in my power to keep you safe.”

 

Evan was touched, and he ran a gentle hand down Laro’s face. “Then let’s talk to Dr. Weir. I imagine she’s going to want you to coordinate some of this, if you’re willing.”

 

“I’d like to contribute,” Laro replied.

 

Evan didn’t argue, although he thought Laro was already doing plenty. “I’m meeting with her in fifteen minutes.”

 

Laro nodded, looking a little nervous. “Of course.”

 

Evan patted him on the shoulder. “I need to call the infirmary about Colonel Sheppard. Give me a minute.”

 

Dr. Beckett assured Evan that Sheppard was resting comfortably, and that he wasn’t in any danger. “You can stop by tomorrow,” he said. “Colonel Sheppard has plenty of company today with his team here.”

 

“Thanks, doc,” Evan replied. “I just wanted to be sure I wasn’t going to be changing job descriptions any time soon.”

 

“I don’t think you need to worry about that, Major,” Dr. Beckett said briskly. “I’ll let the colonel know you asked after him.”

 

“Is Colonel Sheppard all right?” Laro asked.

 

Evan nodded. “He will be. The antibiotics are working, which is a relief. The last thing I want is to be in charge here.”

 

Laro smiled. “You could do the job.”

 

“I could, but I don’t want to,” Evan countered. “I’m not ready to lead the entire expedition.” He paused. “Well, the colony. Come on, let’s see if Dr. Weir is free.”

 

Weir was in her office, looking tired and harried. “Major Lorne, how is everything going?”

 

“Quite well,” he assured her. “Laro has a suggestion as to how to solve some of our difficulties.”

 

Weir turned her smile to Laro. “I’m happy to listen to any suggestions.”

 

Evan nudged Laro into one of the chairs in front of Weir’s desk. Laro remained perched on the edge of his seat, rubbing his hands on the legs of his dark brown trousers. Evan could see the faint splatters that the clay had left; even Laro’s best clothes were marked by his profession.

 

Laro cleared his throat. “In my time on Atlantis, I have been impressed by how much your people know. You have technology that appears to be magic to most of those in this galaxy, and you have people, like Colonel Sheppard and Major Lorne, who can control that technology with their minds. Few people in Pegasus would understand this, unless they witnessed it firsthand.”

 

“Agreed,” Weir replied.

 

Evan was grateful that she didn’t press Laro to move more quickly. Laro moved slowly, carefully, and he laid his groundwork first.

 

“But if I may say this, your people are lacking in certain skills that the people of this galaxy _have_ developed as a matter of survival,” Laro continued. “Including making clothing, and caring for children.”

 

Weir’s eyes narrowed, her shoulders straightening, and Evan could see her interest. “Please, go on.”

 

“There are those among the Athosians, and on other planets, who are unable to run if the Wraith cull the planet,” Laro said. “The elderly, those with disabilities, many times they are left for the Wraith, because there is no other choice, but they are often skilled at stationary tasks, such as making clothing.”

 

Weir nodded. “I think I see where you’re coming from. Go on.”

 

“Those who sew clothing can also look after small children,” Laro said. “And they would be grateful to know that they will be protected.”

 

Weir shook her head. “Your idea has merit, Laro, but I’m not sure we can afford the chance of a security breach.”

 

“You don’t need many people,” Laro replied. “One or two to start with, and the people of Atlantis who are so inclined can learn from them. But eventually, you might take on a few more, and then a few more. If you accept artists and artisans, you will have a cut of everything those artists sell, and enough to purchase or trade for the things you cannot make. Moreover, more and more people will understand how important Atlantis is, as well as the fact that Atlantis will not work without gene carriers.”

 

Weir began nodding. “I see. You think word will spread, and fewer people will be inclined to take the city by force.”

 

Laro nodded. “Yes, exactly. The more people who see this for themselves, the more quickly word will spread. I believe you will find allies that you can rely upon.”

 

Weir looked at Evan. “What do you think?”

 

“We’ll have to vet them carefully, but I think the idea has merit,” Evan replied. “There are a lot of needs we have that we can’t hope to meet on our own. We need to learn from others.”

 

“I agree,” Weir replied. “And I would accept your recommendations, Laro, as well as those of Teyla. Anything else?”

 

Laro hesitated, then said, “Yes, if you’ll permit me, Dr. Weir.”

 

“Please,” she prompted.

 

“There are many who do not understand what you do here, or why the city works for you and no one else,” Laro pointed out. “They believe that if anyone should have access to the city of the Ancestors, it is the people of this galaxy. So, perhaps if you begin training children, offering education, others will understand that to control Atlantis requires more than a mere desire. It requires more knowledge than most can hope to gain.”

 

Weir was silent for a long moment, and Evan held his breath. He knew he didn’t need to point out that Atlantis would need to begin the process of training personnel to replace those they lost. They couldn’t rely on Earth sending either scientists or soldiers anymore.

 

“For what it’s worth, I agree,” Weir finally said. “We _will_ need to take on additional personnel. My concern is that it will give those like Kolya a perfect opportunity to infiltrate and commit sabotage.”

 

Evan cleared his throat. “I agree, and I think we should be cautious, but we can’t afford to become isolationist. We are always going to have to worry about saboteurs. Every time a team from the SGC comes through the gate, we have to consider whether they’re an operative from the Trust, or another group.”

 

Weir nodded. “We’ll have to talk to the rest of the command staff, of course, but those are good ideas, Laro. Where do you suggest we start?”

 

“There is an Athosian girl who was born with a twisted leg,” Laro said. “She is skilled at sewing, and she often watches the children. There is a man who has terrible pain and swelling in his knees, and he is very good with leather. I would suggest you make the same offer to the Ebrus, as well.”

 

Weir smiled. “An excellent place to start, Laro. Will you approach them?”

 

Laro blinked. “If you would like.”

 

Weir nodded. “Colonel Mitchell is on the mainland now, collecting Captain Reeves and his team. I’m sure that Major Lorne would be happy to fly you over once Colonel Sheppard is feeling better, or you can have another one of our pilots take you.”

 

Laro inclined his head. “Is there any hurry?”

 

“I’d like to get started on making spare uniforms in the next two weeks,” Weir replied. “Let me know how things go. Major, I need to speak to you alone.”

 

Evan clasped Laro’s shoulder. “I’ll catch up with you later,” he promised.

 

When the door slid shut behind Laro, Weir cleared her throat. “I’m recalling Captain Reeves because you’re going to need him while John is recuperating. He tells me that Dr. Anson is doing much better, and is ready to come back to Atlantis.”

 

“That’s good news,” Evan observed.

 

“Hopefully, John will be back on his feet soon, but if you need any help, I’m sure you can rely on General O’Neill.”

 

Evan frowned. “If I can ask, what is the general’s position on Atlantis?”

 

“Colonel Sheppard is still the military commander of Atlantis,” Weir replied. “And you are still in charge in his absence. Technically, the general doesn’t _have_ a position on Atlantis.” Weir smiled thinly. “It’s not a bad problem to have—there’s more work than there are people to do it, but we’ll have to make individual determinations as people arrive.”

 

“Is General O’Neill going to be ready for field work?”

 

Weir shook her head. “I’m told that’s unlikely.”

 

Evan had heard plenty of stories about O’Neill, and he’d witnessed the general in action; he wouldn’t have thought O’Neill would be happy riding a desk, but then, O’Neill had taken the promotion to general, which meant getting out of the field.

 

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Evan finally said.

 

Weir sighed. “I wonder if we could get General O’Neill to help sew new uniforms.”

 

Evan raised his eyebrows in surprise, and Weir let out a giggle, which had Evan laughing, as much in surprise as anything else. “I’ll let you bring up that possibility, ma’am,” he said, striving for a solemn tone.

 

She shook her head. “Get out of here, Evan, and let me know when you decide to take Laro to the mainland. With Cam and Captain Reeves back, we should be able to spare you for a few hours.”

 

Evan smiled. “Thanks. Am I that obvious?”

 

“You should take love where you can find it, Major,” Weir replied gently. “There’s no shame in that.”

 

Weir was part of the reason that he had the freedom to be open about his relationship with Laro. “Thank you,” he managed, and then he fled, afraid they were encroaching on emotional territory he didn’t want to touch with his boss.

 

Evan had every intention of working on paperwork—Weir still insisted on regular reports, although they’d gone paperless as much as possible—but then a call came over the radio. “Major Lorne, report to the gate room immediately,” Dr. Weir said.

 

Evan sighed, and jogged that way. Cadman was already there, holding a spare tac vest and a P-90, and Dr. Weir stood next to her. “We have a problem,” Weir said. “There’s been a call from our allies on M31-367. We think it’s Kolya.”

 

He pointedly checked the clip in his weapon. “Good. If I see him, I’m going to put a bullet between his eyes.”

 

“God speed,” Weir replied, with no irony whatsoever.

 

But then, Kolya had threatened to kill her, and had tortured McKay in her presence. It made sense that she’d want him dead.

 

Evan led the way through the gate, stepping out into the cover of darkness from the bright daylight of the gate room. He immediately stepped to the side and waved at his team to fan out as they came through. It was entirely possible that Kolya had already disappeared to another planet.

 

They moved quickly and quietly, and Evan was pleased with how seamlessly they worked together. Cadman stuck close to Evan’s side, her weapon ready. He headed for the village, his team forming a V-pattern behind him.

 

Evan kept his ears open for any hostiles, but they seemed to be alone on the path. The villagers converged on them when Evan moved past the perimeter, all of them clamoring for attention as they passed the first ring of dwellings.

 

“Where is he?” Evan asked, after he’d reassured them that they were from Atlantis and were there to help.

 

Marik, the local headman, said that they hadn’t seen Kolya since he strode into the village a few hours earlier. “I sent a child to the gate to notify you,” Marik explained. “Kolya threatened us, and said that he would kill anyone who did business with Atlantis. We sent a request for aid, and we assured him that we did no business with Atlantis.”

 

Evan smiled. “You don’t, really.”

 

“No, instead you give us aid without asking for anything in return,” Marik replied. “I’m sorry we could not keep Kolya here, but there seemed to be no other option.”

 

“There wasn’t,” Evan assured him. “You did everything right.”

 

Marjik shrugged eloquently. “We owe you much, Major Lorne. I only wish we could have done more.”

 

“Just let us know if Kolya comes around again,” Evan replied. “Keep a watch if you can, and send someone as soon as possible. We’ll do everything we can to protect you, but Kolya has proven that he will kill anyone who stands in his way.”

 

Marjik smiled thinly. “Then we will not stand in his way; we will fade into the woods as we do with the Wraith, now that we know what to look for.”

 

Evan shook his hand. “Let us know if you need anything from us. We don’t have quite the resources we used to, but we’ll do what we can.”

 

They headed back to the gate almost immediately, and Cadman said, “These folks don’t have squat. What did Kolya want with them?”

 

“He’s trying to spread fear,” Evan replied. “To make it more difficult for us to make and keep allies. So far, it’s not working, but eventually he’s going to succeed.”

 

“Just what we need,” Cadman muttered. “One more enemy.”

 

Evan shrugged. “I’m pretty sure that means we’re doing something right.”

 

She chuckled. “Yeah, probably so.”

 

~~~~~

 

John hated being stuck in the infirmary, mostly because Carson kept doping him up, and there wasn’t much he could do to prevent it. So, when Carson finally agreed to spring him, he was grateful for it.

 

“But I want you to rest,” Carson insisted. “If I see you moving around too much, I’ll put you back in the infirmary, and I’ll sedate you again.”

 

“He’ll rest,” Rodney insisted. “I’ll make sure of it.”

 

John glared at him. “Rodney, I’m _fine_.”

 

“You will be,” Carson confirmed. “But you still need to _rest_.”

 

John knew when he was beat. In truth, just arguing with Carson and Rodney was taking it out of him, and he wasn’t looking forward to the trip to his quarters. “I’ll rest,” John promised. “Can I go now?”

 

Carson waved him off. “Go on. And let Rodney do the work by taking a chair.”

 

John grimaced; he hated wheelchairs, but he wasn’t sure he was up to using the crutches all the way to his quarters. “Yeah, okay.”

 

“Do I have to sit on you?” Rodney asked on the way to his quarters.

 

John had already had this argument; Rodney’s bed was bigger, and he’d insisted John stay with him for the duration.

 

“No, you don’t have to sit on me,” John said with what he thought was justifiable irritation. “I’ll rest.”

 

“Good. I’ll get your dinner in a little while,” Rodney promised.

 

John frowned. “I’m really not hungry.”

 

“Tough,” Rodney shot back. “You need to eat.”

 

John knew better than to argue with Rodney when he used _that_ tone of voice. “Yeah, sure. I think I’ll take a nap.”

 

“Do you want me to get you anything else from your room?” Rodney asked, which was fairly solicitous for him.

 

John shook his head. Rodney had brought _War and Peace_ to the infirmary, and John had brought it back with him. “I’m just going to read my book,” he said, holding it up. “Don’t mind me.”

 

He fell asleep about halfway through the first page and woke only when Rodney cleared his throat loudly. “I brought dinner,” he said. “And I don’t care if you’re not hungry.”

 

John’s stomach growled loudly in response, and he smirked. “I don’t think that’s going to be a problem.”

 

He wasn’t sure anybody had named the deer-like creatures the Athosians hunted on the mainland, but they made for good eating. The meat had been stewed in some kind of gravy, and had been spooned over the Atlantis equivalent of mashed potatoes, with steamed greens on the side. John noted that Rodney had also snagged one of the honey cakes that the Athosians served for dessert.

 

Since Rodney loved those cakes, John had a pretty good idea that it was love, or something like it.

 

“Thanks for this,” John said, eating quickly.

 

“No problem,” Rodney replied with a sincere smile. “Just let me know what you need.”

 

John cleaned his plate and then ate the cake, licking his fingers to chase down any lingering sweetness. “This was good.”

 

“Yeah, Dawson outdid herself tonight,” Rodney agreed. “I think she got a few recipes from the Athosians.”

 

“And the honey cakes?” John asked.

 

“The Athosians,” Rodney confirmed. “Dawson and the other cooks have been working to use more local ingredients.”

 

John leaned back in bed, the tray still on his lap. “Well, whatever they’re doing, they ought to keep at it.”

 

Rodney grabbed John’s tray and stacked it on top of his own, setting them outside his door.

 

“They don’t have room service here, Rodney,” John reminded him.

 

“I’ll take care of them tomorrow,” Rodney replied dismissively. “You should go back to sleep.”

 

“I just woke up,” John objected. “And I don’t want to sleep again.”

 

“I’ve got _I, Robot_ ,” Rodney offered. “I heard it wasn’t great, but I haven’t seen it yet.”

 

John grinned. “That sounds good.”

 

The movie wasn’t too bad, and John was interested, but he still fell asleep halfway through. When he woke up, he was slumped against Rodney’s shoulder, drooling on Rodney’s science-blue shirt. Rodney’s fingers were gently massaging his scalp.

 

“Sorry,” John muttered, sitting up and swiping his mouth with some embarrassment.

 

Rodney’s hand remained where it was. “Maybe you’ll believe me now,” he said, his chin tilted defiantly.

 

John didn’t pretend not to know what Rodney meant. “I just…” John trailed off. He didn’t want to risk what they _did_ have for what they _might_ have, but at the same time, it felt good to have Rodney touching him. “It’s not that,” he finally said, unable to explain more than that.

 

Rodney leaned in, his lips finding John’s, his mouth warm and clever and inviting.

 

John groaned and pulled Rodney closer.

 

Rodney pulled back just a bit. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

 

“So, don’t hurt me,” John replied with a grin. “There’s never going to be a good time, Rodney. We’ve been dancing around this for a while.”

 

Rodney grimaced. “Nice of you to finally notice.”

 

“Oh, I’ve noticed,” John countered. “I just didn’t know you were serious.”

 

“I’m nearly always serious,” Rodney replied, and then he kissed John again.

 

Rodney had been right about one thing—his bed was definitely bigger than John’s, which meant they could stretch out next to each other without Rodney putting any pressure on John’s wound. They made out leisurely, and John knew that the combination of recent illness and painkillers—and lingering weakness—wasn’t going to let him take things any further.

 

“The spirit is willing,” he murmured when a yawn punctuated their kisses.

 

Rodney smiled. “The body needs time to heal, and we’ve got time.” His hand was amazingly gentle when he touched John’s face. “Just don’t scare me like that again.”

 

“You know I can’t promise that,” John replied hoarsely.

 

Rodney nodded. “Yeah, I know. Come on, you should brush your teeth so you can get to bed.”

 

There weren’t many people John would have accepted help from, but Rodney was different. His team was about the only ones he trusted that much.

 

Rodney helped John get situated, and then slid into bed next to John, wearing nothing but his boxers and a t-shirt. John had shared a tent with Rodney in the past—they’d even shared a bed on one memorable off-world mission—but Rodney’s presence felt more loaded now.

 

“Is this okay?” Rodney asked anxiously, keeping a decorous few inches between them.

 

John rolled his eyes. “Get over here, McKay.”

 

Rodney slung an arm across John’s waist. “Go to sleep, John.”

 

And he did.

 

~~~~~

 

General O’Neill had always been something of an enigma to Elizabeth. She thought he was a great leader, and a smart man, but he projected an air of insouciance that she found hard to see past. Right now was no exception, because he slouched into her office, and she suspected that his smirk was designed to mask how much pain he was still in.

 

“What can I do for you, Dr. Weir?” he asked, lowering himself into one of the chairs across from her desk.

 

“I think I should be asking you that question,” she replied. “I’m a little curious as to what you want to do here, and what you think should be done with Jon and Cassie.”

 

O’Neill shrugged. “You’re in charge, Dr. Weir.”

 

She leaned forward. “Let’s not play games, General. You and I both know that the charter means nothing if you want to assert control. John won’t fight you, and neither would I.”

 

“And I don’t want control!” he shot back, clearly close to losing his temper.

 

Elizabeth kept her silence, and O’Neill sighed after a moment. “Sorry.”

 

“You’re allowed,” she said softly.

 

“People keep saying things like that,” O’Neill replied. “Just because a guy gets tortured a little bit…”

 

She let the silence hang between them, knowing that O’Neill would fill it eventually.

 

“Jon is as capable as Sheppard is,” O’Neill finally said. “Maybe more so. He’s got my training and the body of a teenager, so he’s great in the field. And he saved my ass,” O’Neill added, clearly as an afterthought.

 

“Then he should be in charge of his own team,” Elizabeth replied.

 

“What team is going to follow someone who looks eighteen?” O’Neill asked. “He barely looks old enough to hold a gun.”

 

Elizabeth nodded thoughtfully. “I’m assuming you have another suggestion.”

 

“What do you do with someone with his training who looks harmless?” O’Neill asked with a quirk of his eyebrow.

 

“And who are we going to spy on?” Elizabeth asked. “Certainly not the Wraith, and Kolya—” She stopped. “You’re not talking about spying here.”

 

O’Neill shook his head. “No, I’m not.”

 

Elizabeth blew out a breath. “This could be a suicide mission.”

 

“I wouldn’t suggest it if I thought they couldn’t get back,” O’Neill replied, shifting a bit in his chair.

 

Elizabeth frowned, noting his discomfort. “Come on. Let’s go somewhere a little more comfortable.”

 

“I’m fine,” O’Neill protested.

 

Elizabeth rose. “You might be, but this discussion requires coffee.”

 

O’Neill glanced out at the setting sun. “I think I’d prefer alcohol.”

 

“That can be arranged.”  Elizabeth led him out of her office, stopping to talk to Chuck. “Colonel Mitchell is on call tonight, Chuck, but let me know if there’s an emergency.”

 

“Yes, ma’am,” Chuck replied.

 

“How many gate technicians do you have?” O’Neill asked.

 

Elizabeth stopped to think about it. “Chuck is our best,” she replied. “But we have five others, including one of the people who came through the gate with Dr. Lam.”

 

O’Neill winced. “We should have seen more SGC personnel by now.”

 

“Is there any chance that they stayed in the Milky Way galaxy?” Elizabeth asked as she led him to the nearest transporter. “Maybe with the free Jaffa?”

 

O’Neill sighed and leaned against the transporter wall. “I hope so, and it’s possible. The WAFGON plan was always a long shot, you know, and it was always eyes only. We didn’t have enough naquadah generators to supply every team we sent out, so we set up caches on planets we thought would be safe. But once the Ori started moving in, and—dammit. We never planned for this.”

 

“And now you want to know what happened?” she asked.

 

“Yeah, I do,” O’Neill said.

 

“One moment,” Elizabeth said. “We need to stop by my quarters.”

 

She had a jug of _ruus_ wine that Halling had sent in thanks, and after a quick trip to the mess, they had sandwiches and fruit. “Carter’s on duty tonight,” O’Neill commented. “I wasn’t looking forward to eating dinner alone.”

 

“You could always eat with Jon,” Elizabeth suggested, feeling a little mischievous.

 

O’Neill rolled his eyes. “Do you know how weird that is?”

 

“I can only imagine,” Elizabeth replied.

 

Elizabeth’s favorite balcony had comfortable loungers with cushions that would be easier on O’Neill’s battered body. She liked O’Neill, and she respected him; she always had. She just wasn’t sure how they would work together long term—and they _had_ to work together. They couldn’t afford division on Atlantis.

 

She poured them both a cup of wine, and they sat in silence for a while, eating and watching the sunset as it turned the ocean orange.

 

“I knew it was beautiful here,” O’Neill said softly. “But the descriptions, even the pictures, didn’t do it justice. The only thing that would make it perfect would be a place to fish.”

 

“The east pier isn’t too bad from what I’ve heard,” Elizabeth replied.

 

O’Neill raised his eyebrows. “But has anybody caught anything?”

 

“Not yet,” she said apologetically.

 

He grinned, his teeth flashing whitely in the gloaming. “Perfect.”

 

“So, you want to send people to Earth,” she said after a pause.

 

“I do. We still have people there, and we have a ship. Even if we can’t retake Earth right now, we need to know what’s going on, and maybe we can get some people out.” O’Neill scrubbed his hands over his face. “I shudder to think what might have happened to Cassie if Teal’c hadn’t reached her in time.”

 

“Speaking of Cassie, Carson speaks very highly of her,” Elizabeth said.

 

“She’s a good kid,” O’Neill replied. “I’ve known her since she was small.”

 

“She’s from another planet, isn’t she?”

 

“Her people were wiped out by the Goa’uld,” O’Neill confirmed. “She’s family.”

 

“Carson is going to offer her training. Laro has suggested offering education and training to likely candidates from this system,” Elizabeth said.

 

O’Neill nodded. “You’re going to have to get replacements from somewhere.”

 

“That’s what I thought.” Elizabeth leaned back in her chair, watching as the stars appeared one by one.

 

O’Neill cleared his throat. “I know it probably doesn’t seem this way, but I’m not suggesting you send Jon to Earth because I want to get rid of him. It’s because I know he’s capable of getting in and out, and no one knows he exists other than my team and General Hammond. And I suspect he’ll volunteer when you throw it open.”

 

Elizabeth nodded. “I think you might be right. The question is who we refuse to accept as volunteers.”

 

“I won’t tell you who you need to keep,” O’Neill replied. “But whoever goes needs to know that they might not come back.”

 

She nodded, and thought that probably went without saying.

 

~~~~~

 

Teyla smiled at Laro. “I don’t think you need to worry about our people not listening to you. You are held in much higher esteem that you think.”

 

“I don’t doubt my place among our people,” Laro protested. “But you have lived here longer than I have, and you are recognized as a bridge between Atlantis and the Athosians.”

 

Teyla easily read the nervousness in Laro’s voice, and she knew he had a desire to please, and to establish a place here on Atlantis. “Then I will go with you.”

 

“Thank you,” he replied with a sigh of relief. “You can offer assurances that I cannot give.”

 

“Who is flying us to the mainland?” Teyla asked.

 

Laro scratched his head. “Evan agreed to fly us out. Apparently, Dr. Weir has recalled some of the Lanteans to the city, and there’s a new group to be flown over.”

 

“Then, let us find your Major Lorne,” Teyla replied with a smile.

 

In truth, Teyla was pleased with how intent Laro was in making a place for himself on Atlantis. He’d held himself apart for so long, holding everyone at arm’s length, losing himself in his art. Given his losses—Teyla was now his nearest relative, and not a close one at that—Teyla did not blame his caution. It was good to see Laro so open.

 

Lorne greeted Laro with a subtle brush of his fingers against Laro’s nearest hand. “Ready to go?”

 

“Of course,” Laro assured him. “You aren’t needed here?”

 

“I can be gone for an hour or two,” Lorne replied. “Don’t worry about me. Hey, Teyla.”

 

“Major,” she replied with a nod. “How are you?”

 

“I’ll be a lot happier when Colonel Sheppard is back on his feet,” Lorne admitted cheerfully.

 

“As will I,” Teyla agreed wholeheartedly.

 

This time, the team they were sending to the mainland was comprised mostly of those who had arrived with Dr. Lam. Teyla sensed that most of them were nervous, and still on edge from their time on the run, and she thought it wise of Elizabeth to send them to her people.

 

Not that the mainland was entirely safe, but Teyla liked the thought that working on the mainland might be able to provide some measure of peace to the people of Earth, who had done so much for them.

 

Once they’d landed, Lorne urged them out of the jumper, like a mother _kifa_ herding her chicks. She wasn’t sure Lorne would appreciate the comparison, but when Laro shot her a questioning look, she murmured, “ _Kifa_.”

 

Laro snorted, and turned the sound into a cough. Lorne glanced over his shoulder, but he didn’t inquire.

 

Halling greeted them immediately, favoring the newcomers with a smile. “Welcome. Thank you for assisting us.”

 

He garnered a few hesitant smiles in return, and Halling waved Jinto over. “Show our guests to where they’ll be staying, please.”

 

“Yes, Father,” Jinto said eagerly and grinned at the newcomers. “Please, come with me.”

 

Jinto’s ready smile called a similar response from the others, and Teyla turned to Halling after they’d gone. “Perhaps you should send Jinto on trade missions,” Teyla said. “He is quite personable.”

 

“He shows some aptitude for it,” Halling admitted. “But I would like to keep him at home a little longer until I send him to you.”

 

Teyla inclined her head, acknowledging the great honor Halling had shown her. “I will be pleased to teach him.”

 

“You did not just come to discuss Jinto’s future,” Halling said. “This way.”

 

He led the way to his tent, pausing to retrieve tea and hot water.

 

Halling poured, and they sipped while exchanging pleasantries until Lorne nudged Laro.

 

Laro cleared his throat. “You know that we have skills the Lanteans do not,” he began.

 

Teyla caught Lorne’s raised eyebrow, and she hid a smile. Laro was very good at getting another person to see his point of view, and she understood his technique.

 

“Agreed,” Halling replied, the hint of a smile curling his lips.

 

“But the city of the Ancients also offers protection, particularly for those who cannot run to escape a culling,” Laro continued earnestly.

 

Teyla saw understanding dawn on Halling’s face. “You would offer shelter for them? I thought Atlantis wanted only the able-bodied.”

 

“Gesi and Huson are skilled with cloth and leather, and the Lanteans need those skills. They would be honored to learn,” Laro replied.

 

Halling nodded slowly, glancing at Lorne. “And you would protect them, even though they cannot run or fight?”

 

“Not everyone on Atlantis can fight,” Lorne said. “We would ask that they at least be able to shoot a gun, just in case they need it, but we would do everything in our power to protect them.”

 

Halling nodded thoughtfully. “And you would offer this protection to others in the same position?”

 

“I think we can,” Lorne replied carefully. “We’re starting with you because we trust the Athosians, Halling.”

 

“As we trust you.” Halling regarded Lorne thoughtfully, and then turned to Teyla. “What do you think?”

 

“I think they are as good as their word,” Teyla replied. “And they have kept Colonel Mitchell on.”

 

Next to her, Lorne stiffened. “I’m not sure I understand. What else would we do with him?”

 

Halling met Teyla’s eyes, asking a silent question, and she nodded. “Major Lorne,” she began, choosing her words carefully. “There are many people who cast out any who might—impose a burden, particularly when the Wraith come. We had seen no one among your people who was permanently injured in some way who was not sent back to Earth.”

 

Halling looked slightly apologetic. “We had no way of knowing what you did with such people.”

 

Lorne shifted. “We protect them as best as we can. Earth is—it’s safer. We can’t send people back to Earth now, so we keep them here.”

 

Laro put a hand on Lorne’s knee. “Evan, we know that Earth is a place free from Wraith, and that is why you sent your injured and your weak. But you are fighting for your lives as much as we are now, and you might not have welcomed the suggestion of taking on those who cannot fight back, and cannot even run away.”

 

“We might be able to help with that,” Lorne said. “I can’t make any promises, and the doc would have to take a look, but—there are a lot of things we can treat.”

 

Halling nodded. “I will talk with Gesi and Huson,” he promised. “And I believe there are others who would be trustworthy, and who would have the skills you need. If they are willing, I will send them to you.”

 

They rose, and Lorne said, “I should make sure that Captain Reeves is set.”

 

“Go,” Teyla said to Laro. “I will be along shortly.”

 

“Laro isn’t coming back,” Halling observed once they were gone.

 

“He is happier on Atlantis than he has been since his parents were killed,” Teyla said. “And I am his nearest relative.”

 

“I am glad you are not alone anymore,” Halling admitted. “The Lanteans are good people, but they are not Athosian.”

 

Teyla smiled briefly, then grew serious once more. “Halling, we have heard rumors of Kolya moving against allies of the Lanteans, and Wraith worshippers have been more than usually active.”

 

Halling frowned. “We are safe enough here with the Ring of the Ancestors on Atlantis, but I will warn our traders to be careful.”

 

Teyla knew Halling was correct. Although having the gate on Atlantis was slightly inconvenient, it did provide an extra measure of protection from threats other than a Hive ship.

 

“I will do the same,” Teyla promised. “But if you hear anything about the Genii—”

 

“I will send word,” Halling said, and touched his forehead to Teyla’s.

 

And that, Teyla knew, would have to be enough.


	9. Coping

_“Although we’d planned for the possibility of Atlantis being an independent colony in the event that Operation Phoenix was activated, we weren’t ready. I think if Atlantis had broken free of Earth in the usual way, there would have been a lot of things we would have done differently. I mean, we had plenty of scientists and soldiers, but no tailors or farmers. We had doctors, but not nearly enough. And there were no families—no spouses, no children, no parents—which is great if you’re talking about an outpost, but not so great for a colony that needs to be self-sustaining, and probably for a long period of time.”_

 

~Interview with Sam Carter

 

Daniel took a sip of the strong tea the Athosians preferred with a purely internal sigh of regret. There were rumors of private coffee stashes on Atlantis, but nothing confirmed. Not that it would matter, because Daniel didn’t have anything to offer in trade.

 

“You know, if I’d been thinking about it at the time, I would have had Teal’c buy up all the coffee he could get his hands on before we left Earth,” Jack said, sliding into the seat next to Daniel.

 

Daniel shrugged. “Elizabeth said she was looking for a viable alternative.”

 

“We’re looking for a lot of viable alternatives,” Jack replied grimly, shifting in his chair.

 

Daniel frowned. “Are you still hurting?”

 

“Just stiff,” Jack said. “I’ll be fine.”

 

Jack had never been one to open up about his feelings, but Daniel had known him a long time now, and he’d seen the dark circles under Jack’s eyes, and the corresponding weariness on Sam’s face.

 

“You and Sam okay?” Daniel asked in a low voice.

 

Jack shot him a dirty look. “That’s none of your business.”

 

“Jack,” Daniel said, using his best warning voice.

 

“We’re fine,” Jack muttered as Elizabeth entered the conference room. “ _I’m_ fine.”

 

Daniel resolved to corner Sam soon and question her, since she was usually more forthcoming.The room was crowded by the time everyone had arrived, since it included all of the higher-ranking personnel on Atlantis, SG-1, Teyla, Ronon, Laro, Jon, and Halling.

 

“Thank you all for coming,” Elizabeth said, calling the meeting to order. “We’re here to talk strategy for the upcoming months, including how we’re going to deal with Earth.”

 

There was some restless shifting at that, but no one spoke. “First, Dr. Zelenka, how is the city mapping going?”

 

“We have bigger quarters cleared for approximately four dozen people,” Zelenka replied. “We are working on more. In a week, we will have bigger quarters for another two dozen.”

 

“Good,” Elizabeth replied. “I’m going to open them up by seniority, unless someone has another suggestion.”

 

No one objected, and Elizabeth nodded. “Halling, I believe you had a report for us as well.”

 

“Gesi and Huson have both agreed to your offer,” Halling announced. “They would be happy to teach you whatever they know.”

 

Carson cleared his throat. “If they’re willing, I’d like to examine them when they come to Atlantis. There might be something we can do for them.”

 

Halling nodded. “So Major Lorne had said. They’ve indicated they’re willing.”

 

Elizabeth smiled. “Carson?”

 

“We’re running low on several items,” Carson admitted. “Including anti-depressants, anti-anxiety medications, and hormonal birth control. The chemists believe they will soon have an alternative to the first two, but we haven’t found a means to create effective forms of birth control. I suggest we caution personnel accordingly.”

 

Dr. Parrish raised his hand. “Teyla pointed us in the direction of a couple of plants that the Athosians use. It might not be as effective, but it will likely be better than nothing.”

 

“Any alternatives to coffee?” McKay asked plaintively.

 

There were chuckles from nearly everyone in the room. Parrish shifted uncomfortably. “I don’t want to say anything prematurely…”

 

“Go ahead,” Elizabeth said.

 

“I think we might have something similar,” Parrish said. “We believe it’s very similar to coffee, but we’re still testing for toxicity and side effects. Give us another couple of weeks, and we’ll know more.”

 

Elizabeth nodded. “Wonderful. Next item of business is Dr. Carter’s project, building additional generators.”

 

Daniel only half-listened as Sam gave her report; he knew she’d been having trouble locating enough naquadah to make a real go of it. When Sam had finished, Elizabeth looked at Daniel. “Dr. Jackson?”

 

“I’ve begun translating an entry that I believe might be instructions on how to build a ZPM,” Daniel announced, smiling when the room erupted with exclamations. Since he’d just finished translating enough of the passage to figure out what the instructions were for, Daniel didn’t feel too bad about springing the news in a briefing like this.

 

“How long have you been sitting on this?” McKay demanded.

 

“Pretty much since the briefing started,” Daniel admitted, enjoying the opportunity to fuck with McKay.

 

Sheppard, who had remained quiet up until now, smirked at Daniel as though he knew exactly what Daniel was doing. “How much did you get through, Dr. Jackson?” he drawled.

 

“About half,” Daniel admitted. “Just enough to let me know what it’s all about.”

 

“Why didn’t you say that immediately?” McKay demanded.

 

Daniel grinned. “Because Dr. Weir didn’t call on me first.” He got a few chuckles for that, and added, “I’ve only just begun the translation. I have no idea if the information is complete.”

 

“You’ll send me word as soon as you have the translation done,” McKay said, his usual arrogance firmly in place.

 

“Of course,” Daniel replied.

 

Elizabeth smiled and shook her head. “John, what do you have?”

 

“We’re still working on locating Kolya,” Sheppard said. “We’ve got another mission scheduled for this afternoon.”

 

Elizabeth nodded. “How’s the leg?”

 

“I’m good to go,” Sheppard replied.

 

Daniel had to hide a smirk when Elizabeth pointedly looked at Carson. “He’s ready for fieldwork,” Carson admitted.

 

Sheppard rolled his eyes. “I told you I was good.”

 

Elizabeth didn’t dignify that comment with a response. “Very well. General O’Neill?”

 

Daniel straightened. He had no idea what Jack had been working on that would warrant being called on now.

 

“We’re all wondering what’s going on back on Earth,” Jack began. “We need information, and I think we all want to know what’s happened to our friends and families. Personally, I want confirmation on the status of the teams I sent out, since they should have beat me here.”

 

Sam was staring resolutely at the table, but Mitchell leaned forward eagerly. “You’re looking for volunteers?” he asked.

 

Jack shot Mitchell a look. “I take it you’re interested.”

 

Mitchell held up his right hand. “They’re going to underestimate me with this; they might not even recognize me. I’m not doing anything here that someone else couldn’t.”

 

Elizabeth frowned. “Cam, that’s not true.”

 

“You’ve got General O’Neill,” Mitchell replied bluntly. “And it makes a lot more sense to have him be your alternate, not me.”

 

Daniel had worked with Jack long enough to recognize a tendency towards self-sacrifice when he saw one. “You’re a member of SG-1,” Daniel protested. “They’re going to be watching for you.”

 

Mitchell shook his head. “No, they won’t. Not if we do this right.”

 

“And they won’t expect him to be with me,” Jon said.

 

Jack’s clone hadn’t taken a seat at the table. Instead, he’d found a corner of the room to lean on and had his arms crossed in a pose that was typically Jack. Daniel had wondered what Jon was going to do on Atlantis.

 

Apparently, Jon wasn’t planning on staying on Atlantis.

 

“Should someone from Atlantis go?” Lorne asked, sounding hesitant, his eyes focused on Jack.

 

Daniel glanced at Laro, who had stiffened, although he remained silent.

 

“I can’t spare you, Evan,” Sheppard said quietly. “And I think two people will be less conspicuous than three or four.”

 

Daniel didn’t miss the relief on Lorne’s face, or on Laro’s.

 

“Cam, this is a suicide mission!” Sam protested.

 

“I wouldn’t ask anybody to go on a suicide mission, Carter,” Jack snapped. “They’ll be coming back, hopefully with more of our people.”

 

Sam shut her mouth, her lips forming a thin, tight line.

 

“Elizabeth and I agreed,” Sheppard said. “We’ll minimize the risk as much as we can, but the truth is that we need to know what we’re facing, and we need to know if we can retake Earth with a strategic strike now. If we wait too long, we risk the Trust becoming too entrenched for us to move against them.”

 

“And if they’re already too entrenched?” Daniel demanded. “They basically shut down the SGC. We’ve all got warrants out for our arrest. This isn’t just going to go away.”

 

“Agreed,” Elizabeth replied simply. “But if that’s the case, there are people who are going to need to get out. To that end, we’re going to need a list from everyone on the city—no more than three people they think would be in the most danger. We’ll operate on a lottery system.”

 

There were murmurs from around the room, but no one disagreed. A lottery was the fairest means to choose who was coming to Atlantis.

 

“And if you can transport a lot of coffee, even better,” McKay said. “Scientists do not run on tea alone.”

 

The rest of the meeting was rather subdued, and Daniel listened with only half an ear. As soon as they were done, Sam was on her feet and the door. Vala nodded when Daniel caught her eye, and Daniel ran after Sam.

 

“Sam!” Daniel called. “Come on, Sam! Wait up!”

 

She slowed down slightly. “I have work to do, Daniel.”

 

“You can talk to me first,” he insisted. “I know we’ve been up to our ears with work since we got here, but I want to know what’s going on with you and Jack.”

 

“Nothing is going on,” she shot back. “We’re fine.”

 

“You know, that’s what he said, and I didn’t believe him either.” Daniel grabbed her arm. “Sam, this is me you’re talking to. You know that.”

 

She stopped suddenly, her shoulders slumping. “Let’s talk about this in my lab.”

 

Daniel followed her inside, putting a hand on her shoulder. “Okay, Sam, what’s up?”

 

“We had an argument,” she admitted. “Jack knew Jon was going to volunteer, and I knew Cam would. I wanted Jack to tell Cam he couldn’t go, but Jack refused.”

 

Daniel wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “You know it has to be Cam’s decision.”

 

“Cam thinks he has something to prove!” Sam protested. “And he doesn’t.”

 

“What reason did Jack give?” Daniel asked.

 

She leaned her forehead against Daniel’s shoulder. “The same one you did.”

 

“You know he’s right.”

 

“I know Jack wants revenge,” Sam countered. “And while I don’t blame him, I wish he’d talk to me, but he won’t. Nothing I say gets through to him.”

 

“Give him time,” Daniel advised. “You know how Jack is.”

 

“I can’t stand the thought of losing him now that I’ve got him back,” Sam murmured.

 

Daniel just hugged her tightly, knowing that there were no assurances he could give.

 

~~~~~

 

Vala didn’t like to see a friend hurting, and she knew Sam was upset about O’Neill’s plan and Cam’s decision. She trusted that Daniel would look after her, since Vala was scheduled to go out with Sheppard’s team.

 

Even though Elizabeth had wanted to send SG-1 out on missions, that hadn’t happened yet, and Vala was fairly sure it was because no one wanted to go out as a team without Cam. And Sam and Daniel both had so much to do they didn’t feel the need to leave.

 

Vala, of course, was in a different position entirely, and she was grateful for Sheppard’s willingness to include her. “Good to have you,” Sheppard said as Vala arrived in the gate room.

 

“I’m always happy to lend a hand,” she replied cheerfully.

 

She was a little surprised to see McKay there, since he hadn’t accompanied them the last couple of times Vala had gone on a mission with Sheppard’s team.

 

“You sure you want to join us, McKay?” Sheppard drawled.

 

“Like I’m going to let you out of my sight,” McKay shot back. “You’re not getting shot again, not on my watch.”

 

Sheppard opened his mouth to make a quick retort, and then snapped his mouth shut. “Yeah, buddy. I know you’ll do your best.”

 

McKay glared at Teyla, Ronon, and Vala. “I’m holding all of you responsible,” he said. “Watch him.”

 

Major Lorne jogged into the gate room. “I wish you would let me go, sir.”

 

“Not a chance, Major,” Sheppard replied with an easy grin. “I owe Kolya, and this is the best shot we’ve got.”

 

Lorne nodded, his mouth twisting downwards. “Yes, sir.”

 

“Relax, Lorne,” Sheppard replied. “You’ll get your chance. I promise, next lead we have, we’ll flip for it.”

 

Lorne smiled. “Good luck, Colonel.”

 

“Look after my city,” Sheppard instructed.

 

Lorne saluted. “Yes, sir.”

 

They went through the gate, their weapons out and ready. Sheppard clearly didn’t want to take any chances, and they fanned out from the gate silently, taking up their positions, keeping McKay in the middle.

 

McKay fumbled the life signs detector out of his vest and frowned when he saw the screen. “We’ve got no one close by,” McKay said quietly.

 

Sheppard sighed. “Yeah, that’s what I figured. Let’s start a search grid.”

 

So far, this mission looked as though it would be less fruitful than exploring the city, but it was still more interesting than watching Daniel research. Besides, Vala liked going through the gate, and she appreciated the opportunity to help down the people who had killed those kids.

 

This time, Vala was paired off with one of the younger Marines, a Sergeant Robbins, whose demeanor was mixture of enthusiasm and grim determination. “Generally, I’m on trade missions, not manhunts,” Robbins remarked.

 

“It’s my first manhunt, too,” Vala replied. “Although I’m not opposed to hunting down the bad guys.”

 

“Me neither,” Robbins replied with a grin.

 

“Should I call you something other than Sergeant Robbins?” Vala asked.

 

“Becky,” she replied. “It’s just Becky.”

 

“Very well, then, ‘just Becky,’” Vala replied cheerfully. “Let’s hunt down the bad guys.”

 

They worked the search grid methodically, because to do otherwise was to risk friendly fire, and Becky murmured, “It’s a bit like hunting deer back home.”

 

“You were a hunter?” Vala asked in a low tone.

 

Becky shot her a grin. “Yes, ma’am. Deer, turkey, even elk a few times.”

 

“I have no idea what those are,” Vala admitted.

 

Becky laughed. “They’re good eating, which is pretty much all you need to know.”

 

Vala stopped, hearing something up ahead. “Becky?” she whispered.

 

Becky nodded sharply, bringing her weapon up to bear.

 

Vala nearly squeezed off a shot before she realized that it was just a kid running through the woods. He let out a frightened squeak when he saw them, and Vala let her P-90 hang from its strap as she reached out to stop him.

 

“It’s okay,” she assured him. “You’re okay. What are you running from?”

 

“Men!” he gasped. “I didn’t mean to spy, I didn’t!”

 

“Which way?” Becky asked urgently.

 

The boy pointed, and Vala said, “Climb a tree and hide. If you go crashing through the forest, you’re going to get hurt.”

 

The boy didn’t need to be told twice; he shimmied up a nearby tree, disappearing into the branches. Satisfied that he was safe, they set out. Vala tapped her radio. “Colonel?”

 

“Go ahead.”

 

“We think we’ve got a location on the Genii,” Vala said.

 

“Approach with caution,” he advised. “If they have superior firepower, hang back and wait for the rest of us.”

 

“Of course,” Vala replied, although she wasn’t sure she meant it. She wasn’t willing to risk not going back to Daniel, or to risk Becky getting killed, but superior firepower hadn’t stopped her yet.

 

They approached cautiously, making as little noise as possible. The camp was well hidden; Vala nearly stepped right into the middle of it before she realized she’d reached the perimeter. She motioned to Becky, and they both stepped back, trying to erase any sign of their passage.

 

Becky led the way around the edge, and Vala kept her eyes open for Genii. She spotted one of them patrolling, an ancient-looking pistol in his hand.

 

Vala put a finger to her lips, motioning Becky to be silent, and then she fired the zat, rendering him unconscious. Becky smirked and whispered, “I really want one of those.”

 

“Get in line,” Vala replied in a whisper.

 

Together, they dragged the Genii soldier into the underbrush, and Becky used a zip tie to bind his wrists.

 

“What about a gag?” Vala whispered.

 

Becky smirked and reached into her pack, pulling out a rag and stuffing it into the man’s mouth. “Next?”

 

They took out another sentry without causing a ripple, and they gave him the same treatment they’d given the first. By that point, Sheppard had joined them, and he grinned wolfishly when he saw their prisoner. “You guys are awesome,” he murmured.

 

“Thank you,” Vala replied, even as Becky blushed. “And yes, we are.”

 

“How many?” Sheppard asked as McKay reached them.

 

Becky shook her head. “We took out two, including this one, but we haven’t seen any others.”

 

 “We’ll surround the encampment and do what we can to corral them, then,” Sheppard replied. “Hold your positions here.”

 

Vala wanted to shoot a few more people, but she supposed it was only fair to let the others take their turns.

 

They held their positions until Sheppard signaled the all clear.

 

“There’s no sign of Kolya,” Sheppard said with a frustrated sigh. “Dammit. I wanted to end this.”

 

Becky cleared her throat. “Uh, sir? We do have two Genii in custody.”

 

“Give me fifteen minutes,” Ronon said, an evil glint in his eyes.

 

Vala could tell that Sheppard was torn. He ran a hand through his hair, disheveling it even further. He glanced over at McKay, who was staring determinedly at the ground, then he looked at Teyla. “What do you think?”

 

“I think we should be—” Teyla paused delicately and finished, “persuasive.”

 

Sheppard pinched the bridge of his nose. “Robbins, I want you to go back and secure the gate. Make sure the locals are okay, and wait for us there.”

 

Becky looked as though she wanted to protest, but she finally nodded. “Yes, sir.”

 

“Teyla, Ronon, you’re with me,” Sheppard said.

 

Vala cleared her throat. “As am I.”

 

“Vala—” Sheppard began.

 

She offered a thin smile. “You forget, I was host to a Goa’uld for a long time, and I have many ways of getting someone to tell their secrets. I have no qualms about this, Colonel. Perhaps _you_ should go back to the gate.”

 

“I’m not going to ask anyone to do something I won’t do myself,” Sheppard replied. “But I’ll take the assist. Robbins? Take McKay and the rest of the Marines with you.”

 

“John!” McKay protested. “I can stay!”

 

“Rodney, I would really prefer if you didn’t.”

 

Vala watched as their eyes locked, and she could see the battle of wills take place. Eventually, McKay nodded, his mouth in a tight, angry line. “ _Fine_ , John. Take this on, too.”

 

“It’s not like I have a choice, _Rodney_ ,” John shot back. “We need information. Just—go.”

 

McKay stalked off into the brush, leaving Becky and the others to follow in his wake. Teyla gave Sheppard a reproving look. “Rodney cares for you, John.”

 

“I know he does, but he doesn’t need to be here for this,” Sheppard replied.

 

Ronon smirked. “Bet you I won’t even have to touch ‘em.”

 

“And what are we going to do with them after?” Sheppard asked wearily. “We can’t take them back to Atlantis, and we can’t exactly let them go.”

 

“Could let them run,” Ronon suggested. “And then shoot them.”

 

Sheppard appeared to think this over fairly seriously before he said, “Let’s use the usual interrogation techniques first. If we can’t get anything out of them, we’ll get more creative.”

 

Vala showed Ronon where their first sentry was trussed up. Together, they dragged him back to the clearing, leaving the second Genii tied up right where he was. Vala figured he’d be wondering what had happened to his compatriot by the time they got to him.

 

They dropped the first Genii in the middle of the clearing, and Ronon pulled the gag from his mouth.

 

Sheppard smiled at the young man. “Here’s the thing,” he began conversationally. “I would like to let you make a run for the gate, but I’ve got people here who would prefer to kill you immediately. It’s up to you as to who gets their way.”

 

The man brought his chin up in a stubborn tilt. “I won’t tell you anything.”

 

“That’s what you think,” Sheppard replied. “Ronon, he’s all yours.”

 

Ronon loomed over the man, who was looking more nervous by the second.

 

Clearing her throat, Vala said, “Don’t hurt him too much. He’s really rather pretty.”

 

Ronon chuckled, a sinister sound that sent chills up Vala’s spine, even though it wasn’t directed at her. “I’ll leave his face alone.”

 

The young man blanched, but he held firm. “I won’t tell you anything.”

 

“Maybe you won’t, but your friend might,” Ronon replied, advancing on the man with a drawn knife. “It’s just a matter of time.”

 

The man squeaked, but said nothing.

 

Ronon smirked. “Good. More fun for me that way.”

 

Taking Ronon’s cue, Vala said, “I think we should bring his friend over here. Sometimes watching can be just as instructive as hands-on learning.”

 

The man swallowed, looking between Ronon and Vala as though trying to gauge how serious they were. “You’re from Atlantis,” he protested. “You won’t hurt me.”

 

“That’s where you’re wrong,” Vala replied. “I’m _not_ from Atlantis, and I have no problem hurting someone who would kill small children.”

 

“Come on, Vala,” Sheppard said. “Let’s collect his friend, and then we can start digging the graves.”

 

Vala led Sheppard back towards the place where they’d left the other sentry trussed up. “You don’t want to do this,” Vala observed.

 

“I want to believe we’re above torture,” Sheppard replied wearily.

 

“Who said anything about torture?” Vala asked. “There are plenty of ways to get information, Colonel. I’ve used many of them, if not most of them. Intimidation, threats, psychological coercion—you name it.”

 

“And you think that’s going to work on the Genii?” Sheppard asked.

 

Vala shook her head. “John, it works on _everybody_. We all have secrets we don’t want to reveal, and we give ourselves away at every turn. We just have to find the right button to push.”

 

“If you say so,” Sheppard muttered, reaching down to haul the Genii sentry to his feet.

 

Vala seized the man’s other arm. “You know, Colonel, I think we should leave the person who doesn’t talk out for the Wraith to find. Remember those Wraith worshippers? I’ll bet they’d be happy to have another sacrifice.”

 

Sheppard shot her a look, and then nodded. “I know just the planet.”

 

~~~~~

 

Cam figured that just about everyone on Atlantis had a favorite balcony, a place to watch the sun rise or set, or to look up at a sky full of alien constellations. His favorite spot was out of the way; he hadn’t seen anyone else on this balcony since he’d found the spot shortly after he’d been released from the infirmary.

 

That was why he was a little surprised to have Elizabeth step up to join him, leaning on the railing.

 

“I didn’t think you ever got out of your office,” Cam joked.

 

Elizabeth laughed. “On occasion, I do. I like this spot, too.”

 

“I haven’t seen anyone else out here,” Cam replied.

 

She smiled. “Yes, well, that’s probably because most people know that you prefer your privacy.”

 

Cam looked out over the ocean, which had been turned orange by the setting sun. “I didn’t use to. I _like_ people.”

 

Elizabeth stayed silent, leaning against the railing, just looking at him.

 

“But when I was recovering after Antarctica, I didn’t want to see anybody,” Cam continued. “My parents visited a couple of times, but that was it. O’Neill, Sam, Jackson, even Teal’c showed up, but they didn’t stay long. I didn’t want them to.”

 

“So, you’re running away now?” she asked.

 

“No, I’m doing something that matters,” Cam countered. “Maybe if General O’Neill hadn’t shown up, I wouldn’t have volunteered, but he’s probably more capable than I am of being your alternate. I don’t know that I’m ready to sit behind a desk, and this gives me a chance to get out in the field.”

 

Elizabeth put a hand on Cam’s forearm. “I understand, but I’ll miss you.”

 

Cam realized he’d miss her, too, more than he’d thought possible. “Same here.”

 

“And you’re really okay with going on this mission with General O’Neill’s clone?” she asked with a grin.

 

Cam laughed. “It’s a little weird, I’ll grant you, but weird seems to be normal in this line of work.” He looked up at the sky. “I always wanted to fly; I just never thought I’d be on another planet.”

 

“I don’t think any of us did,” Elizabeth replied. “Certainly not like this.”

 

“Is there anyone you want me to check in on while we’re on Earth?” Cam asked, meaning it.

 

Elizabeth grimaced. “My mom, if you have a chance. She has no idea where I am, and I’d rather she not know unless she’s in danger.” She paused. “Are you going to check on your parents?”

 

Cam hitched one shoulder. “I’m going to try. If it’s too dangerous, then I’ll let them keep wondering.”

 

“You’ll have a lot of leeway,” Elizabeth observed. “You can check on a lot of people, help them go underground if necessary, and then come back here.”

 

“I _am_ coming back,” Cam promised. “I’ve got two weeks with the Athosians to look forward to.”

 

“I’ve heard it’s a good time,” Elizabeth replied. She put her hand over Cam’s where it curled around the railing.

 

“Maybe you should get away,” Cam suggested. “You need a break, Elizabeth. Even when I’m supposedly in charge, you’re still on call. Maybe you should get off the city for a few days.”

 

“Maybe I will,” she replied with a smile.

 

He turned his hand over and let their fingers interlace. “Have Sheppard and the others come back yet?”

 

She shook her head, leaving her hand where it was. “Not yet. I’m expecting a call any minute now.”

 

Cam nodded. “You worried?”

 

“I’m always worried,” Elizabeth admitted. “It’s just a matter of degree.”

 

The radio crackled, as though Cam’s question had summoned answers, and Chuck said, “We’ve got an unscheduled gate activation. It’s Colonel Sheppard’s IDC.”

 

“Let him through,” Elizabeth ordered, and she squeezed Cam’s hand once before letting go. “Would you like to join me?”

 

“I wouldn’t have it any other way,” Cam replied.

 

~~~~~

 

Jack had handpicked most of the personnel who had gone through the gate to Atlantis on the first wave, including Carson Beckett. Beckett was not only an expert in his field; he was also a dedicated, empathetic physician who could handle the demands that an expedition to another galaxy would place on him.

 

That didn’t mean Jack liked what he had to say, however.

 

“There’s got to be a way to fix this,” Jack protested. “Dammit, I can’t live my life on painkillers. You don’t have enough!”

 

“We’re working on alternatives,” Beckett replied soothingly. “As much as I could wish for a magic wand, I believe you’ve seen as much improvement now as you ever will.”

 

Jack thought of the ache in his bones most mornings, and how difficult it was to respond to Carter’s advances.

 

No, it was Sam now, and he shouldn’t forget that.

 

“So, what the hell am I supposed to do?” he demanded. “You need all the able-bodied people you can get.”

 

Beckett fixed him with a stern expression. “We do, but we also need able administrators. You might not like it, but Elizabeth could use a break, particularly now that Colonel Mitchell has volunteered to gather information on Earth.”

 

Jack had never wanted to be stuck behind a desk, but he’d taken the promotion because he’d known it was only a matter of time before he was more hindrance than help in the field, and he hadn’t been ready to retire.

 

But he’d always held on to the idea that he _could_ go out in the field if he was needed; Hammond had done so on a few memorable occasions. Now, Jack knew that he had no choice but to ride the bench. He couldn’t move fast enough, and he wasn’t strong enough, to make the risk worthwhile.

 

It just hurt like a motherfucker to admit that he never would be field ready again; he was always going to be in pain—the question was how much.

 

Jack managed to thank Beckett for his time and then stalked out of the infirmary, limping down the hallway. He wanted a drink. Actually, he wanted to get shit-faced and just forget for a while—forget his failures, forget his losses, forget the horror he’d left behind. He wasn’t paying much attention to where he was going and ran right into Sheppard.

 

“General O’Neill,” Sheppard said, putting out a steadying hand. “Sorry about that.”

 

Jack shook his head. He wasn’t in the mood to make small talk. “Don’t worry about it.”

 

He stepped aside, planning to go around Sheppard, who didn’t move his hand. “If you don’t mind me saying so, sir, you look like you could use a drink.”

 

Jack bit back a snarl and took a deep breath. “I don’t suppose you know where I could get one.”

 

Sheppard smirked. “As a matter of fact, I do. You ever tried _ruus_ wine? The Athosians make it.”

 

“I’m more of a beer man,” Jack replied.

 

Sheppard shook his head. “All due respect, sir, _ruus_ wine is what you want. It gets the job done a hell of a lot faster.”

 

Jack liked the sound of that. “Never let it be said that I passed up the opportunity to try the homebrew.”

 

“Let me make a call,” Sheppard replied.

 

Jack couldn’t help but hear Sheppard’s side of the conversation. “It’s Sheppard. Do me a favor and bring that bottle of _ruus_ wine to the pier, would you? And a few glasses.”

 

“We having a party?” Jack asked.

 

“It’s always a party around here,” Sheppard replied cheerfully. “Don’t worry, sir. You’ll enjoy the company. Let’s head out to the east pier.”

 

Jack glared at him. “Are you managing me?”

 

“I wouldn’t dare,” Sheppard replied.

 

The moon had risen over the ocean when they stepped out onto the pier. “I heard you rounded up a couple of Genii.”

 

“They won’t be bothering us again,” Sheppard replied.

 

Jack raised his eyebrows. “Did you kill them?”

 

“No, we stranded them on a planet with a space gate,” Sheppard replied. “They might survive, and then again they might not.”

 

“Did you use torture?”

 

Sheppard shook his head. “I didn’t need to. Do you know how scary Vala and Ronon can be when you put them together?”

 

“No, and I don’t think I want to know.” Jack sat down on the edge of the pier. “Where’s that wine?”

 

“On its way,” Sheppard replied complacently. “In fact, I think it’s here now. Jackson, good of you to join us.” He pushed himself to his feet. “And I just remembered that I had a thing tonight. Sorry to desert you, General O’Neill, Dr. Jackson.”

 

Jack glared at Sheppard’s retreating form. “I knew you were managing me!” he shouted after him.

 

Sheppard turned and offered a sloppy salute before disappearing inside.

 

“You arranged this,” Jack accused.

 

Daniel shrugged. “I might have. I told a couple of people to keep an eye out for you. I knew you’d avoid me.”

 

Jack stared straight ahead. “You’re overstepping your bounds.”

 

“You’re my best friend, and Sam is like a sister to me,” Daniel replied. “And she was just about crying on my shoulder today. So, yeah, I ambushed you, and I’m going to pull out every trick I know.” Daniel poured them both a mug of wine. “And I know you’re more likely to talk about what’s bothering you if you’re drunk.”

 

Jack took a sip and raised his eyebrows. “This isn’t bad.”

 

“From what I’ve heard, the Athosians know how to celebrate,” Daniel replied. “Next time they have a celebration, we’ll have to go to the mainland.”

 

Jack took another, deeper drink. “Yeah, maybe so.”

 

Daniel just sat quietly for a long time as they drank. Jack pretended not to notice that Daniel drank far less than he did, and he slowly felt the anger drain away.

 

“I’m not going back out in the field,” Jack said quietly.

 

Daniel sighed. “I know.”

 

“I hurt all the time,” Jack admitted. “And Beckett has a limited supply of painkillers.”

 

Daniel didn’t say anything.

 

“The first night—was great,” Jack said quietly. “But I’m an old man, Daniel. Sam deserves better than some broken down soldier.”

 

Daniel smiled. “Jack, Sam’s been in love with you for _years_. I think you’re doing her a disservice.”

 

“I’m not talking about this with you,” Jack cautioned.

 

“You already are,” Daniel observed.

 

Jack held his silence for a while, trying to shake off his irritation. “I spent my whole life serving my country and my planet,” he finally said.

 

“And what do you have to show for it?”

 

“Exactly!” Jack knew he was saying more now that he was drunk than he would have if he were sober. He didn’t mind, actually. The words were easier to say with a little lubrication. “I’ve got nothing.”

 

“You could retire,” Daniel suggested. “Just retire here. There’s fishing, there’s Sam. What more could you want?”

 

Jack grimaced. “A job?”

 

Daniel smirked. “How did I know you were going to say that?”

 

“Because you know me way too well,” Jack responded readily. “Danny, I don’t know how to do this.”

 

“Fake it ‘til you make it, Jack,” Daniel countered. “Sam loves you; you love her. The situation sucks, but all we’ve got is each other, to give voice to a cliché.”

 

“Suck it up, buttercup?” Jack suggested.

 

Daniel smiled. “If you’d rather.”

 

“I got through that shit because I wanted to get back to Carter,” Jack admitted suddenly. “I wanted to get back to my team.”

 

“So, go to her,” Daniel replied. “Go, and tell her everything you just told me. This is Sam. She’ll understand.”

 

Jack wanted to argue, but he knew Danny was right.

 

And he _hated_ that.

 

“Yeah, fine,” he replied, pushing himself to his feet. “I’ll talk to her.”

 

“I’ll walk you back,” Daniel said, snagging the now-empty wine jug and the mugs. “You okay?”

 

“I’m fine,” Jack said, swaying a bit, and reaching out to steady himself on the railing. “Just give me a sec.”

 

Daniel, to his credit, stayed where he was, not offering the help Jack didn’t want to accept. They made their slow way down the hall towards the quarters Jack had been sharing with Sam since he’d arrived on Atlantis. Daniel set the jug down on the floor and clapped Jack on the shoulder. “None of us are getting through this unscathed, but it’s up to us to find a way to live with the scars.”

 

Daniel walked away, and the door slid open upon Jack’s silent request. Sam was sitting cross-legged on the bed, a laptop balanced on her legs. “Hey,” she said cautiously.

 

Jack sat down next to her, settling himself gingerly on the edge of the bed. The alcohol had dimmed the worst of the pain, and he moved a lot better than he had since before the Trust got ahold of him. “Hey.”

 

He met her eyes, knowing that they had always done their best communicating through silence. For so long, they hadn’t been able to risk putting words to the bond between them; Jack drew on that silent understanding now.

 

Sam watched him steadily, and her face softened. “You want to tell me about it?”

 

“I can barely get out of bed in the morning,” Jack confessed.

 

Sam set her laptop on the floor and reached for him. “I know,” she replied. “I don’t care, just as long as you’re here.”

 

And Jack held onto her, because she was about the only thing he had left to hang onto.

 

~~~~~

 

Sam was grateful to wake up with Jack curled around her, as he’d seemed to be pulling away over the last couple of weeks. Maybe they hadn’t said much the night before, but she felt like they’d said enough.

 

Fumbling for her radio, she put it on, and then gently extricated herself from Jack’s grasp. He groaned. “Shit. Kill me now.”

 

Sam smiled. “That _ruus_ wine has quite the kick, doesn’t it?”

 

“Shut up,” Jack muttered. “How can you be so cheerful?”

 

“I don’t have a hangover,” Sam reminded him. “Go back to sleep, Jack.”

 

He rolled over and buried his face in the pillow. Sam smiled and ran a tender hand over the back of Jack’s head, feeling the fine, gray hair. She pulled on a pair of BDUs that weren’t the cleanest, and set off on her run.

 

The circuit she’d mapped out over the last weeks generally meant that she picked up at least a couple of people. This morning, Lorne fell into step next to her, and then Cassie joined them. She’d clearly been waiting for Sam, and she shrugged when Sam sent her a questioning look. “I started running to combat the freshman 15,” Cassie explained. “I might not be able to keep up the whole time, but it’s better than running alone.”

 

“You’re welcome to join us any time,” Sam replied.

 

“Good to have you,” Lorne said.

 

Cassie nodded and managed to keep pace with Sam and Lorne. Halfway through their run, they ran into Sheppard and Ronon, who slowed their pace slightly. “How are you settling in, Cassie?” Sheppard asked.

 

Cassie blinked and smiled uncertainly. “Uh, good. Dr. Beckett has been great.”

 

Sheppard smiled. “Glad to hear it.”

 

He and Ronon were the first to peel off, and then Lorne dropped out. Sam ran with Cassie back to her quarters. “Thanks for letting me join you,” Cassie said. “I hope I didn’t slow you down too much.”

 

Even though they were both sweaty, Sam didn’t hesitate to pull Cassie into a hug. “Never. You want to grab breakfast together?”

 

Cassie nodded. “Yeah. How’s Jack?”

 

“Hungover,” Sam replied honestly. “But I think he’ll be all right. Fifteen minutes?”

 

Cassie grinned. “Perfect.”

 

When Sam entered their quarters, Jack had pulled a pillow over his head, and Sam tried to be quiet so as not to disturb him, even if she was sorely tempted to start slamming around just to torture him a little bit. Still, she resisted, because she was nicer than that.

 

Instead, she took a shower and got cleaned up, and pulled on a clean uniform. “Hey,” Sam said softly, putting a hand on Jack’s back. “You want anything?”

 

Jack groaned. “No.”

 

“Drink some water, and take the aspirin,” Sam advised, leaving the glass of water and a couple of Tylenol on the bedside table.

 

Cassie was waiting for Sam outside her quarters, wearing a black Atlantis uniform. Sam wondered what Janet would have thought of her daughter in uniform, and decided that her friend probably would have been happy that Cassie was relatively safe.

 

Sam draped her arm over Cassie’s shoulders. “I’m sorry I’ve been so busy.”

 

Cassie leaned into Sam. “It’s not your fault. And really, Dr. Beckett has been keeping me busy, too.”

 

“I wish you could have stayed in school,” Sam replied.

 

Cassie smiled. “I don’t want to be anywhere else. I’m with my family.”

 

“Yeah, but there aren’t a lot of people your age here,” Sam countered.

 

Cassie gave her a mischievous grin. “Yeah, but some of the Marines are pretty cute.”

 

“I will blow them up if they mess with you,” Sam replied, only half-kidding. “And if I don’t blow them up, you know what Jack will do.”

 

Cassie tried to glare, but Sam could see the smile playing around her mouth. “Which is why if I find someone I’m really interested in, I expect you to run interference.”

 

“Only after I vet him first,” Sam countered.

 

“Deal,” Cassie agreed as they walked into the mess.

 

Lorne was already there, with Laro by his side, and he waved them over. “Glad to have you both join me this morning,” Lorne said.

 

Sam set her tray down. “Do you make a regular habit of it?”

 

Lorne offered a bashful grin. “As often as I can drag myself out of bed early enough. I might manage it more often if I knew someone was waiting on me. Colonel Sheppard and Ronon set a brutal pace.”

 

“I don’t,” Sam replied. “So, tomorrow?”

 

“I think I can make that work,” Lorne replied. “Cassie? You going to join us?”

 

Cassie shrugged, but she appeared pleased to have been asked. “That would be cool.”

 

Sam knew that Cassie had always been comfortable with adults, and she hoped that would serve her well on Atlantis, since most of the Marines were at least a few years older than her. And from what Sam had seen, none of them were worthy of Cassie’s time.

 

Then again, Lorne had proven that the sea was bigger and had more fish than anyone had thought, at least on Atlantis.

 

Daniel joined them about fifteen minutes later, sitting on the other side of Cassie. “Do you still have time to help me today?” he asked her.

 

Cassie nodded. “I don’t have a lot on my plate.”

 

“Great,” Daniel replied. “I’ve got some transcription work that I could really use your help on.” Daniel shot a look at Sam. “I’m still hoping to lure Cassie to the dark side.”

 

“Maybe I should start charging for my time,” Cassie joked.

 

“And maybe I should tempt her with high-power weaponry,” Lorne replied.

 

“The weapons might tempt me,” Cassie replied.

 

Lorne grinned. “Any time you want to hit the range, just let me know.”

 

“I might take you up on that,” Cassie replied.

 

“Then you can join me,” Laro replied gallantly. “I’m also learning how to handle weapons.”

 

Cassie smiled. “That would be nice.”

 

Sam was intrigued. “I didn’t realize you were learning how to use weaponry, Laro.”

 

Laro shrugged. “It seems wise if I’m to stay on Atlantis. I’m also learning how to fly a Jumper. It appears that I’m one of the few Athosians for whom the gene therapy worked.”

 

“The gene therapy took for me, too, which seems crazy,” Cassie said.

 

“The Ancients originated from your galaxy,” Laro pointed out. “It makes sense that more people there would have their genetic capabilities.”

 

Cassie smiled thinly. “Yeah, I’m special. Excuse me. I’m going to get more of the not-bacon.”

 

Laro and Lorne watched her go. Daniel stared down at his plate. “Did I offend her?” Laro asked after a moment.

 

Sam shook her head. “No, but Cassie’s people were used as guinea pigs by the Goa’uld, and Cassie was the only survivor from her planet.”

 

“A guinea pig is an animal that is often used as a test subject for an experiment, particularly when survival is not guaranteed,” Daniel supplied.

 

Laro grimaced. “I see.”

 

Cassie returned to the table with another helping of the meat that might almost be bacon, and some of the fruit local to Pegasus. “Did I miss anything?”

 

“Nothing at all,” Sam replied.

 

She didn’t see the need to bring up Cassie’s past in front of her, not when Cassie tried so hard to put it behind her.

 

Cassie gave her a sharp look, as though she knew what the topic of conversation had been, and then she shrugged. “So, did you all hear the latest gossip?” she began. “About Marie and the guy from botany?”

 

Sam figured that Cassie was fitting in just fine.


	10. Life's Just Like That

_“Yeah, so I have a relationship with John. Everybody always asks us about that. Look, it just happened, okay? One minute, he’s my best friend, and the next, we’ve been together for years. I think you’ll find there are a lot of people on Atlantis who would say the same. We all faced extraordinary difficulties together—enemies within and without, food shortages,_ clothing _shortages, you name it. And in the end, all we had was each other. That’s the thing about being on a colony in_ another galaxy _. It doesn’t matter how much you hate someone. They’re still going to be your neighbor._ ”

 

~Interview with Rodney McKay

 

“I do not need to go,” Radek protested as he strapped on his tac vest.

 

Evan knew how much Radek hated going off-world, but the other option was to take McKay, and Sheppard wasn’t inclined to let McKay go off with another team.

 

“We need you to pull information off the DHD,” Evan pointed out. “Do you know someone else who can do the job as well as you?”

 

Radek glared at him. “Flattery will get you nowhere.”

 

Evan grinned. “Flattery eases the way.”

 

“I have not seen Laro lately,” Radek observed.

 

Evan sighed. “He’s been busy getting the other Athosians settled on the city.”

 

“This has nothing to do with your offer to sacrifice yourself?” Radek asked.

 

Evan shook his head. “I was doing my job.”

 

“Laro is not military,” Radek pointed out. “All he sees is that you were willing to leave him.”

 

“Yeah, I got that.” Evan checked the clip in his personal weapon and secured it in his holster. “Let’s get this done.”

 

Sheppard was there to see them off as usual. “Don’t have too much fun, kids.”

 

“Not without you, sir,” Evan replied.

 

They had been following every lead on Kolya’s whereabouts, with no success. He and Sheppard had been taking it in turn, although Evan knew that Sheppard was hoping to find Kolya himself.

 

The area around the gate was clear, and Evan glanced at his team. “Stay sharp,” he ordered. “I don’t want to be caught unaware.”

 

Corporal Johnson took their six, and the other Marines fanned out, keeping Zelenka protected in the middle. “Radek, let’s pull the information from the DHD now, before we have company.”

 

Radek worked quickly to recover the information from the DHD, his clever fingers disconnecting the data pad once the transfer was done. “Done.”

 

“All right, let’s move,” Evan said. “Maybe we can find witnesses.”

 

The gate was in the middle of a valley, surrounded on nearly all sides by steep hills with rocky outcroppings, which meant it was a prime location for an ambush. There was only a faint hint of a path, and Evan led the way. They’d never been to this planet before, and Evan had no idea what to expect from the inhabitants, although he was inclined to tread lightly.

 

But when the faint path petered out, Evan spotted the village with the houses burned out. Evan bent to feel the ashes, which were cold.

 

“There’s no one here, sir,” Johnson called, kicking at a charred beam.

 

“Yeah,” Evan said. “Let’s look for survivors or any sign of Kolya, then we’ll head back to Atlantis.”

 

There were a few bodies, burned beyond all recognition, but not nearly as many as Evan would have expected if the entire village had been killed.

 

Evan spotted a gun in the wreckage of one of the houses, and he fished it out, holding it up to the light.

 

“What is that?” Radek asked.

 

“Genii weapon,” Evan responded. “They were here, but I don’t think they are anymore. Let’s head back.”

 

The trek back to the gate was made in silence, and Evan grimaced, wishing that he had better news to bring. He unclipped his weapon and looked around the gate room, although he wasn’t surprised to find that Laro wasn’t present.

 

Dr. Weir skipped down the steps from her office. “I take it you didn’t find him.”

 

“There was a burned out village, and I found a Genii weapon,” Evan replied. “But no other sign than that.”

 

Dr. Weir nodded. “Good work. See Carson. We’ll debrief in an hour.”

 

“Yes, ma’am,” Evan replied.

 

He headed for the infirmary with Radek at his side. “You must talk to him,” Radek said softly.

 

Evan frowned. “What are you? My mother?”

 

“I am your friend,” Radek replied mildly. “You are happier with him. He is a good man. So, I am telling you to talk to him.”

 

“I will,” Evan promised. “After we’re done with this.”

 

Radek shot him a sharp look. “See that you do.”

 

Beckett cleared them fairly quickly, and they gave their report to Weir, Sheppard, and McKay.

 

“How long do you think it had been since the Genii were there?” Sheppard asked.

 

Evan shook his head. “I couldn’t say for sure, sir, but I’d guess it would be at least four or five days. It’s hard to say why the Genii would have burned the village to the ground, though.”

 

“They’re child killers,” Sheppard said sourly. “Who knows? Maybe these folks wouldn’t play ball, or maybe they looked at Kolya wrong. Just add it to the list of Kolya’s crimes.”

 

Weir glanced at Sheppard reprovingly. “We don’t know that it was Kolya, John.”

 

“Do you think it was Radim’s people?” Sheppard countered. “Because if it wasn’t him, it was Kolya. Lorne found the Genii weapon at the scene of the crime.”

 

Weir frowned, but finally nodded. “I can’t disagree with you there. Radek, you have the information from the DHD?”

 

Radek nodded. “Yes, Dr. Weir. I will work on it. There are a couple of young scientists who can correlate the data.”

 

“Do that.” She put her hands on the table. “Cross check the addresses with any Ladon Radim gave us, and any of our allies. Not everyone may have been able to send word to us as Keras did.”

 

The meeting ended at that point, and Evan was about to leave, to find Laro, but Sheppard called him back.

 

“Elizabeth and I were talking, and we both agreed that the hunt for Kolya has to take a backseat for a while,” Sheppard said, grimacing as though the words left a bad taste in his mouth.

 

Evan raised his eyebrows. “And the front seat?”

 

“Alliances,” Sheppard replied. “Food and other goods, as well as another ZPM. With one more, we’ll be up to full power, or close to it, and we won’t have to worry so much about the Wraith dropping by for a visit.”

 

Evan could see where this was going. “I take it we’re going to be working on the mission roster for the next month.”

 

“Cheer up, Lorne,” Sheppard replied with a grin. “I’ll get someone to bring us dinner.”

 

Evan couldn’t think of a way to tell Sheppard that he needed time to straighten things out with his boyfriend. Duty came first. “Of course, sir.”

 

They spent the next several hours going over the roster, and the list of planets to visit, assigning each team as fit its expertise. Sheppard prevailed upon Barnes to bring a couple of trays from the mess.

 

“I take it you’ve still got Barnes doing the scut work,” Evan said.

 

Sheppard shook his head. “I don’t know what to do with him, to be honest.”

 

“He’s young, and he’s a hothead,” Evan pointed out. “And he’s a pain in the ass. He might settle down as time goes on.”

 

“Let’s hope so,” Sheppard grumbled. “Otherwise, I’d half a mind to saddle Mitchell and Jon with him, and they could leave him on Earth.”

 

Evan chuckled. “That would be one way to deal with the problem, but it’s a little unfair to Colonel Mitchell.”

 

“Which is why I haven’t made the suggestion,” Sheppard agreed. “But if he doesn’t settle down soon, I’m going to keep it as an option.”

 

“Until we’ve got enough in the way of supplies to send Mitchell and Jon back to Earth, I’d suggest using SG-1 as another first contact team.” Evan pointed out four of the addresses on the list. “We could use their experience, and you and I have more than enough to do.”

 

“Good idea,” Sheppard said. “We’ll use Jon as the fourth member.”

 

Evan’s eyebrows went up. “Isn’t that a bit odd, sir?”

 

“More than a little,” Sheppard replied. “But they’re about the only ones who won’t assume that he’s completely green based on his appearance.”

 

“Good point,” Evan replied.

 

With the addition of SG-1 to the roster, the rest of the scheduling went quickly, and Sheppard finally waved him off. “Get out of here. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

 

“Yes, sir.” Evan went back to his own quarters first. He stood in the middle of the room, contemplating his bed, tempted by the idea that he could just go to sleep and forget for a while.

 

Then again, he knew Radek was right. He had to fix it—or try to fix it.

 

Evan let out a long breath, then headed for Laro’s room, knocking briskly. There was no response at first, and Evan scratched the back of his head, before knocking again.

 

This time, the door slid open, and Laro stood there, blinking sleepily. “I’m sorry. I didn’t hear you knocking the first time.”

 

Evan believed him; there wasn’t an ounce of deception in Laro. “I’m sorry it’s so late,” Evan apologized. “I got stuck going over the roster with Colonel Sheppard.”

 

Laro smiled. “I understand. Would you like to come in?”

 

“I think we need to talk,” Evan began, stepping past him.

 

Laro followed him back into the room and sat down on the edge of the bed. “What would you like to talk about?”

 

Evan had no idea what to say, or how to say it, so he finally just blurted out, “I didn’t want to go back to Earth. I don’t want to leave Atlantis, or you.”

 

Laro’s blank expression didn’t change. “Then why would you offer?”

 

“There’s going to be a lottery,” Evan said quietly. “To decide who on Atlantis can bring their families over, or offer them the chance to leave Earth. That’s the only fair way to decide, but the people who go back can at least check up on them. If I don’t go, Colonel Mitchell might agree to look in on them, but he won’t make it a priority like I would.”

 

Evan could see the tension run out of Laro’s broad shoulders. “Why didn’t you tell me this before?”

 

“I don’t know,” Evan admitted. “It seems selfish, I guess.”

 

“You want to protect your family,” Laro replied. “There’s nothing shameful about that.” He leaned in, pressing his lips to Evan’s, threading his fingers through Evan’s hair.

 

Evan put his hands on either side of Laro’s face and pulled him down on top of them. Their legs tangled, and Evan pushed his hands under Laro’s shirt.

 

“I knew Sheppard wasn’t going to let me go,” Evan whispered against Laro’s mouth. “But I had to ask.”

 

Laro just kissed him, his solid body covering Evan’s, and Evan couldn’t be sorry that he was here, instead of back on Earth.

 

~~~~~

 

Teyla nodded at Laro as he entered the sparring room, careful not to allow surprise to show on her face. She continued to circle the two Athosian guides who were learning the _bantos_ , correcting their forms with a few words here and there. “Alaan, do not drop your left shoulder. And Ripa, feel your connection with the ground. That’s where your power comes from.”

 

By the end of the session, she felt they had made real progress, and she said as much. “I will see you in two days for our next training session.”

 

Laro nodded at Alaan and Ripa as they left, but he stayed where he was, leaning against the wall.

 

“I don’t suppose you have come for a lesson,” Teyla said.

 

Laro shook his head. “No. I’ve told Evan that I will learn how to use a weapon, but you teach the warrior’s way.”

 

Teyla smiled. “Then what brings you by?”

 

“Gesi wishes for your presence in the infirmary during her examination,” Laro replied. “I offered to stay with her, but she wanted to have you there as well.”

 

Teyla nodded. “Of course. How is she?”

 

“Frightened, hopeful, but afraid to hope,” Laro replied. “As you would expect.”

 

“And you and Evan?” Teyla inquired.

 

Laro shot her a disgruntled look. “We’ve spoken, and we’ve come to an understanding,” he admitted. “He was worried for his family.”

 

“I believe most people on Atlantis share his anxiety,” Teyla replied softly. “The people of Earth face much uncertainty.”

 

Laro nodded. “I understand that. I just—didn’t realize. Evan doesn’t talk about his family often.”

 

“Sometimes it is easier to forget if we don’t speak of it,” Teyla said softly. “And there are times when it is certainly easier to forget.”

 

Laro glanced away. “I know that very well.”

 

Teyla put a hand on his forearm. “I know you do.”

 

They stood outside the infirmary, and Teyla pulled Laro’s forehead to hers. “I only want your happiness,” she murmured. “And I am happy to have you here.”

 

“Atlantis is my home now,” Laro replied.

 

“And it is good to have you here,” Teyla replied. “Come. Let’s go to Gesi.”

 

She reached out as soon as she saw Gesi, sitting on one of the infirmary beds, looking very small and scared.

 

“Teyla,” the girl said gratefully. “Laro said he would ask you to come.”

 

“Of course I did,” Teyla replied. “There is nothing to fear from Dr. Beckett. He only wants to see if he can make you well.”

 

Gesi glanced down at her twisted foot. “I never thought I could be cured, and I know I was getting too heavy to carry.”

 

Teyla pulled her arm around Gesi’s shoulders. “If anyone can heal you, it is Dr. Beckett.”

 

As though her words had summoned him, Dr. Beckett bustled up a moment later. “Ah, here we are. Gesi, isn’t it?”

 

“Yes, sir,” she said, her words barely audible.

 

Beckett patted her hand. “Not to worry, lass. This won’t hurt a bit, I promise.”

 

Gesi squeezed Teyla’s hand, but she didn’t voice a protest as Beckett examined her leg. “Can you help?” she asked softly.

 

“We’ll need to run a scan, but I think it might be possible,” Beckett replied. “It won’t be an easy process, mind, and I’ll go over it with you more in detail before we start, but I think it might be possible to correct the problem.”

 

Gesi’s face lit up. “Will I run?”

 

“Eventually, that might be a possibility,” Beckett agreed. “Although I make no promises.”

 

Gesi smiled tremulously. “It’s more hope than I’ve ever had, Dr. Beckett.”

 

“Well, I think we can make you a good deal more comfortable than you are at the moment,” Beckett replied. “I’ll just ask Marie to set up a scan, and we’ll see what happens.”

 

Gesi squeezed Teyla’s hand even harder. “Thank you, doctor.”

 

“You won’t feel a thing in the scan,” Beckett promised. “And I’ll go over all your options before we move forward. Just give me a moment.”

 

Gesi glanced at Teyla. “Do you think it’s real?”

 

“It’s more than real,” Teyla assured her. “And if Dr. Beckett says that he can cure you, I believe him.”

 

Gesi nodded. “I just never thought it possible.”

 

“The Lanteans have many methods of curing problems we do not know how to treat,” Teyla replied.

 

Teyla stayed with Gesi through the entire process—the scan, waiting for results, waiting for Beckett to make a determination and a recommendation, and then the decision-making process. Dr. Beckett was hopeful that Gesi would be able to walk without a crutch, although he cautioned that she would likely always have a limp, but Gesi was thrilled with the news.

 

“You have given her great joy,” Teyla said after Laro had left to escort Gesi back to her quarters.

 

Beckett flushed. “It’s a real pleasure to be able to correct a problem like that, rather than stitching up wounds,” he admitted. “Unfortunately, our access to arthritis medications is limited, so I won’t be able to do much for Huson, although I’m hoping that will change as we’re able to synthesize more medications.”

 

Teyla patted him on the shoulder. “I know you will do everything you can.”

 

These days, Teyla felt less alone than she had after the Athosians had moved to the mainland, and she had made the decision to stay on Atlantis. The other guides were settling in, and Laro, Gesi, and Huson were making a place for themselves on the city.

 

And, of course, Teyla had her team.

 

That night, at dinner, Ronon dropped into the seat next to her. “Mission tomorrow,” he observed.

 

Teyla nodded. “I’ve traded with the Donak in the past.”

 

“Any problems?”

 

“I didn’t experience any,” Teyla replied. “But then I did not know that the Genii were more than simple farmers.”

 

Ronon shrugged. “You can’t know everything.”

 

Teyla didn’t say that she felt as though she should—she felt as though she should have known about the Genii. She might have saved the Lanteans a lot of trouble if she’d never introduced them.

 

John took the seat next to her. “Movie night tonight,” he announced. “Although we’re keeping it to one episode of _Doctor Who_.”

 

“That the one with the blue box?” Ronon asked.

 

“It’s a little more than a blue box,” Rodney protested.

 

John grinned. “Yeah, but you have to admit that the TARDIS is a big part of the show. It’s practically the star of the show. The Doctor changes; the TARDIS doesn’t.”

 

Rodney looked almost as though he was in physical pain as he said, “You may have a point.”

 

John blinked at him, then a slow smile spread over his face. “Wait, I’m right? That’s what you meant to say, right?”

 

Rodney scowled. “I believe I said that you may have a point. _May_.”

 

“But that’s not what you _meant_ ,” John crowed. “You would totally have a TARDIS if you could.”

 

“Who wouldn’t?” Rodney asked. “You can’t tell me that if you had the chance to go back in time, you wouldn’t.”

 

“And screw up my chances of being born?” John asked. “Teyla? What about you? If you could go back in time and change something, would you?”

 

Rodney held up a hand. “You know, if you subscribe to string theory—”

 

“Not now, Rodney,” John said, cutting him off. “I want to hear Teyla’s answer.”

 

Teyla’s mind immediately went to the moment she’d taken John to the ruins, when he’d found her old necklace and had activated the Wraith beacon. It hadn’t been John’s fault, of course, nor hers, but that didn’t change what had happened.

 

And she could not say that was the moment she would change without hurting John, which she wasn’t willing to do.

 

“Every moment I have lived has led me to this point,” Teyla said. “How could I change one moment and still be the person I am?”

 

“She’s got a point,” Ronon said smugly.

 

John shrugged. “She always has a point. Ronon? Would you change something?”

 

Ronon’s expression darkened. “Yeah.”

 

That was all he said, but the emotion in his voice made Teyla pat him on the arm.

 

John’s expression turned sympathetic. “Rodney? You were so vocal about changing the past. What would you change?”

 

“What wouldn’t I?” Rodney asked. “Do you know how many people I’d get back at if I had the chance? My entire high school career would be different.”

 

John raised his eyebrows. “ _That’s_ what you would change?”

 

“You don’t know what high school was like for me,” Rodney said. “What about you? What would you change?”

 

John glanced at Teyla, and she could see in his eyes that he had his own regrets, things that he would change if he could. But what he actually said was, “I’m with Teyla on this one. Maybe I’d nip the Ori problem in the bud, but the one thing I’d change I couldn’t have done anything about.”

 

Teyla had no idea what he was talking about, but she knew better than to press. Rodney wasn’t so circumspect, however. “What would you have changed?”

 

John glared at Rodney, but to Teyla’s surprise, he actually responded. “I would have stopped my mom from getting sick.”

 

The others fell silent at that admission, and Teyla suspected that they all had someone whose deaths they would have prevented.

 

Rodney was watching John with an expression Teyla had seen when he was working out a particularly thorny problem in the past. “I think I’d avoid that last argument with my sister,” Rodney said quietly. His lips quirked. “Even if I was totally right.”

 

That comment broke the awkward silence, and they all laughed. “So, _Doctor Who_?” John prompted, clearly relieved at the change in subject.

 

They had not had much time for this, Teyla thought later, leaning against Ronon’s warm bulk even as Rodney sat so close to John that their shoulders and hips were touching. Elizabeth hadn’t been inclined to allow Rodney and John to go off-world at the same time, which meant that the team had spent little time together lately.

 

As good as it was to have Laro and the other Athosians on the city, Teyla’s first family would always be her team.

 

When the episode was over, Ronon rose and pulled Teyla up with him, although John and Rodney stayed where they were. “We’ll see you tomorrow for the briefing,” John said, waving at them. “Sleep well.”

 

Teyla heard a click as the door closed behind them, and she exchanged a look with Ronon, who smirked.

 

“Good thing Atlantis listens to Sheppard,” Ronon remarked in an undertone.

 

Teyla laughed. “It is.”

 

~~~~~

 

Elizabeth looked around the table. “Teyla? Do you have anything to add?”

 

Teyla shook her head. “No, I think I’ve covered everything.”

 

Elizabeth nodded. “Very well, then. Good luck.”

 

Teyla paused on her way out of the room. “How are you?” she asked in an undertone.

 

Elizabeth shrugged. “I’m rolling with the punches.”

 

“And Colonel Mitchell?”

 

“If we can make a deal with the Donak, we’ll have the supplies we need to send Colonel Mitchell back to Earth,” Elizabeth admitted.

 

“So, you don’t want us to succeed?” Teyla asked.

 

Elizabeth smiled. “For the good of Atlantis, I hope you do.”

 

Teyla’s frank gaze was perceptive. “And for your own sake?”

 

“I’d prefer to ignore my own sake,” Elizabeth replied. “Atlantis is the only thing that matters right now.”

 

Teyla touched her arm. “Then we will see what happens.”

 

Elizabeth breathed deeply after Teyla had gone, trying to get her emotions under control. She was busy, she had a lot to do, but she couldn’t stay in her office right now. She began a circuit of the city, checking in with the scientists in the labs, and with the Marines sparring in the training area.

 

She literally ran into General O’Neill on her way back from the gym, and he gave her a sharp look. “Are you okay?” he asked.

 

“Fine,” Elizabeth said, mostly out of reflex. “I was just taking a walk.”

 

O’Neill smirked at her. “The walls start closing in on you after awhile, don’t they?”

 

“Colonel Sheppard’s team is on a first contact mission,” Elizabeth admitted. “I always worry more over those, although I know things can go wrong even with our allies.”

 

“Pretty much anything can go wrong at any time,” O’Neill agreed cheerfully. “It’s probably better to get used to that now.”

 

Elizabeth grimaced. “That’s your pep talk?”

 

“It’s the best I’ve got,” he admitted. “Fishing helps.”

 

“I don’t have the time for fishing,” Elizabeth replied.

 

O’Neill shrugged. “Well, I was actually on my way to bug Sam and see if she wanted to grab lunch.”

 

Elizabeth knew she didn’t want to be alone, so she asked. “Can I tag along?”

 

“I wouldn’t have mentioned it otherwise,” O’Neill replied.

 

Sam was holding a heated debate with Zelenka when they stopped by her lab. “I agree that the generators could be used to supplement the power from the ZPMs, but I think we’re going to burn out any of them we’ve got hooked up.”

 

“Not if we’re careful!” Zelenka shot back. “We need drone production.”

 

“And we also need the cloak. If we come under attack, someone is going to have to move pretty quickly to disconnect all of them,” Sam objected.

 

“So, we find someone to disconnect them. One of the young Marines, perhaps, or several. We will make it part of the battle stations,” Zelenka argued.

 

“He has a point,” O’Neill drawled.

 

Sam turned to glare at him. “Jack—”

 

“Look, it’s a risk, but we need the drones. Right now, we’re not in a good place to deal with a Wraith attack. With more drones, we might stand half a chance at surviving,” O’Neill replied.

 

“We’d need more than drones,” Elizabeth replied. “We’re going to need more Jumpers, and more pilots to fly them. Or we’re going to need to find a way to take out multiple darts at once.”

 

Sam straightened. “What if we found a way to target Wraith darts specifically?”

 

“Can you do that?” Elizabeth asked incredulously.

 

Sam hesitated. “If I could get my hands on a dart, I could give you a better idea, but from what I’ve heard, Wraith technology is very different. It’s a bit like Ancient tech, or Goa’uld tech. There’s more to it than just a machine. If we can pinpoint and exploit that difference, maybe we can take the darts out in the air.”

 

Zelenka’s face lit up. “If we could do that…” He shook his head. “But we would need to get a dart.”

 

“It’s possible,” Elizabeth reminded him. “I’ll alert all teams to the need to find one if they can.”

 

“And now that we have that settled, it’s lunch time,” O’Neill announced. “So, let’s get a move on, people.”

 

“We’re right in the middle of something,” Sam protested.

 

O’Neill crossed his arms. “Yeah, maybe, but you should take the break and eat something. You’ll think better for it.”

 

Elizabeth was certain that Zelenka or Sam—or more likely both—would argue, but something about O’Neill seemed to command respect. She wondered if it was the rank, but she suspected that it was just the man.

 

Sam looked as though she wanted to argue, but she finally shrugged. “All right. I guess I can eat.”

 

Zelenka seemed willing to follow Sam’s lead, because he agreed. “I could eat. Knowing Rodney, he will want an update that will make us late for dinner.”

 

Over the course of lunch, O’Neill managed to steer the conversation away from anything work-related, or at least science related, by raising a hand every time Sam or Zelenka tried to bring it up. “Ah, ah,” he said. “You can talk geek when you’re back in the lab.”

 

Daniel sat down next to O’Neill just as he was giving that admonition. “Then I guess you don’t want to hear about my latest translation.”

 

“Does it tell us where to find the treasure?” O’Neill asked. “Because if it doesn’t, the answer is definitely not.”

 

“I’ve isolated about half a dozen entries that talk about ZPMs,” Daniel replied, smiling as Vala sat down next to him. “And I’ve found detailed schematics of Atlantis, along with descriptions of all the rooms.”

 

Zelenka’s expression lit up. “We had not been able to find something like that before!”

 

Daniel smirked. “That’s because the Ancients’ index is so jumbled that it’s nearly impossible to find anything. In this case, it was filed under ‘architecture,’ in a subfolder that you’d have to know was there in order to find it.”

 

“How did you know it was there?” Elizabeth asked.

 

Daniel shrugged. “Instinct, mostly. Even though I don’t remember anything from being ascended, I still seem to know how to find things.”

 

“Thank god for that,” Zelenka muttered. “You will send me the translated file?”

 

“I’ll send you what I’ve finished so far immediately after lunch,” Daniel promised. “I’m still working on translating the entry that talks about building a ZPM. I think the Ancients deliberately fragmented those particular entries.”

 

O’Neill grimaced. “Cagey bastards.”

 

Daniel shrugged his agreement. “You can say that again.”

 

“Cagey bastards,” O’Neill repeated with a quirk of his lips.

 

Elizabeth snorted, and heard Sam’s choked laughter. Their eyes met, and they both grinned at each other in shared amusement. On Daniel’s other side, Vala rolled her eyes, although she was also smiling.

 

Suddenly, Elizabeth heard something that sounded a lot like an explosion. Elizabeth had pushed away from the table and was on her feet before it really even registered. She tapped her radio and sent out an all-call. “What the hell was that?”

 

“I don’t know, ma’am,” Chuck responded. “No one seems to know where it came from.”’

 

“Find out!” Elizabeth ordered tersely.

 

The radio crackled. “Dr. Weir, this is Major Lorne. There’s been an explosion on the lower level, South Pier. According to the duty roster, there was supposed to be a team of scientists mapping the area.”

 

“Where are they?” Elizabeth demanded.

 

“I can’t reach them, ma’am,” Lorne admitted. “I need Zelenka to assess structural integrity before we send teams in.”

 

“On my way,” Zelenka replied, his voice echoing oddly, both over the radio and from Elizabeth’s side. “Dr. Weir?”

 

“Go,” she said. “What do you need.”

 

“I will let you know,” Zelenka replied, muttering in Czech as he jogged off.

 

O’Neill rubbed his eyes. “Life is never dull, is it?”

 

“Not around here,” Elizabeth replied grimly.

 

Vala, Sam, and Daniel were on their feet. “We should probably see what we can do to help the rescue crews,” Sam said. “We’ve worked rescue before.”

 

The radio crackled again, and Cam’s voice filtered through. “Elizabeth? I heard what happened. According to my records, we’ve got at least five missing.”

 

Elizabeth blew out a breath. “Lorne’s on it, and Zelenka is joining him. Daniel, Sam, and Vala are going to help the rescue efforts.”

 

Cam growled inarticulately. “And I can’t help.”

 

“Well, you _could_ ,” Elizabeth replied, striving for fairness. “I’ll leave it up to you to decide whether you’d just be in the way.”

 

Cam sighed. “Yeah, I think I’ve already figured that out for myself. All right, I’m going to coordinate efforts with the rescue team. I can do that much, anyway.”

 

Even though Elizabeth knew she should leave it to Cam, she couldn’t stand by and watch from her office. A glance at O’Neill’s face told her that he felt the same way. O’Neill also gave her a quick headshake.

 

Elizabeth did a quick mental calculation, and she said, “All right. You do that. General O’Neill and I will set up additional command posts and work with the rescue crews, but you're in charge. Keep me informed, Cam.”

 

“Will do,” he promised.

 

O’Neill pulled Sam into a quick hug. “Be careful,” he ordered.

 

“Yes, sir,” Sam replied with a quick grin, pressing her forehead to his. “Don’t get ambitious, Jack.”

 

“Never,” O’Neill responded with a half-smile that Elizabeth didn’t trust for a second, and she suspected that Sam didn’t trust it either. “Go.”

 

When the others had gone, Elizabeth looked at him. “Are you having a hard time waiting, too?”

 

“I always have a hard time waiting,” O’Neill replied. “But Mitchell needs to feel useful, now more than ever.”

 

“And the same can’t be said for you?” Elizabeth countered.

 

O’Neill shrugged. “I’ve got something he doesn’t.”

 

“And that is?”

 

“Sam,” O’Neill replied simply. “She knows me well enough to kick my ass when I start feeling sorry for myself.”

 

Elizabeth nodded knowingly. “We all need someone like that.”

 

“Indeed, we do, Doctor,” O’Neill replied, using her title with a sympathetic smile. “I’m sorry I’m going to be a poor substitute for him.”

 

She cleared her throat. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

 

“Yeah, I know that line, too,” O’Neill said quietly. “Go. Join the rescue crew. I’ll set up in your office and keep an eye on the gate.”

 

Impulsively, Elizabeth put a hand on O’Neill’s arm. “Thank you.”

 

“Don’t mention it,” he replied. “I expect to be kept in the loop.”

 

“Of course,” she replied. “You’re part of the loop now.”

 

O’Neill smiled. “Good to know.”

 

~~~~~

 

John had learned to take Teyla’s lead off-world, particularly when meeting a group of people that she’d already visited. So, he had no problem sketching a quick bow when she did as the leader of the Donak inclined his head. With a motion of his hand, John signaled the rest of his team to do the same.

 

Ronon inclined his head more deeply than he would have without John’s signal, and Rodney bowed slightly from the waist, the movement jerky.

 

“I had heard you were working with the Lanteans, Teyla,” the Donak headman said. “I wasn’t sure I believed it.”

 

“Rivert, I am still serving my people,” Teyla replied. “I determined that this was the best way I could watch out for their interests.”

 

“Atlantis and the Athosians share a close relationship,” John said. “And we are grateful to the Athosians for their kind assistance.”

 

Rivert looked at Teyla, then at John. “I see. Well, you are welcome here, all of you. Please, come.”

 

John had been to a lot of planets, and before he’d ever gone off-world, he’d been to a lot of different countries. Nearly all of them had a similar ceremony—sharing tea, sharing bread, even sharing salt. John was used to drinking what he was asked to drink, to eat what he needed to eat. This time, the food of choice was a local delicacy, and that delicacy looked a lot like a giant bug.

 

Rodney looked faintly green, but he hoped Rodney would follow his lead. They needed this trade agreement, and Rodney knew that.

 

As the leader of the team, John went first, biting through the crunchy exterior of the bug, suppressing his shudder of revulsion with some effort. “Great,” he managed.

 

Teyla ate one, as did Ronon, and when the platter was passed to Rodney, John held his breath, not quite trusting that Rodney would carry it out. To John’s surprise, Rodney ate the bug with every indication of enjoyment.

 

“This is quite good,” Rodney said. “I hope you’ll give us the recipe.”

 

Rivert beamed at him. “These are my wife’s specialty, so I’m afraid we cannot share the secret. She hasn’t even told me.”

 

“What a shame,” Rodney said.

 

John bit his lip to keep from smiling, hearing the underlying sarcasm in Rodney’s voice.

 

“We are happy to trade, of course,” Rivert said, all smiles now. “We are always pleased to have new allies.”

 

The trade deal was made amiably, without a hitch. Rivert’s manner was straightforward and helpful, and Teyla indicated that Rivert was offering a fair deal when John took a quick break to check with her privately.

 

John kept waiting for the other shoe to drop, for Rivert’s people to produce weapons and threaten them, or to get screwed over on a deal. But the bugs were the worst thing they had to deal with; Rivert’s wife plied them with a strong, hot drink that was the closest thing they’d had to coffee, and tiny, exquisite honey cakes.

 

“What is this drink?” Rodney asked, clearly trying to keep his enthusiasm under wraps, even though he was unsuccessful.

 

Rivert smiled. “We call it _shiska_. Would you like to add some to the trade deal?”

 

“We would,” Teyla said smoothly. “It is very similar to an Earth drink called coffee.”

 

Rivert hesitated. “It grows freely on this planet, but the best place to get it is several days’ journey away, and it requires much labor.”

 

“We can provide assistance,” John promised. “We’ve worked out a similar deal with the Athosians. And if we help you harvest it, you can then turn around and trade it on other worlds.”

 

Rivert smiled widely. “That is a very interesting offer, Colonel Sheppard. We might be able to work that into our agreement.”

 

Another hour went by, until John was buzzing from the combination of sugar and what was probably a caffeine-like substance. In the end, they had a satisfactory agreement for medical assistance and help with the harvests in exchange for food and _shiska_. They bowed and drank a cup of something strongly alcoholic to seal the deal.

 

He could tell that Ronon was similarly tense, expecting trouble, but it never came. Teyla dialed the address for Atlantis, and the gate whooshed to life.

 

“This means we can send the team back to Earth,” Rodney said quietly.

 

“I guess that’s what it means,” John replied. “Have you made your list?”

 

“My sister and her family,” Rodney replied. “It’s not much of a list.”

 

“More than I’ve got,” John acknowledged.

 

When they walked through the gate into controlled chaos, John knew that he’d been right to be suspicious. Nothing ever went smoothly in the Pegasus galaxy. The fact that the trade deal had gone off without a hitch meant that it had to be offset somewhere else, this time with an emergency on the city.

 

O’Neill met them in the gate room, wearing a radio and looking serious, but with a spring in his step that had been absent. John suspected he knew the cause; a man like O’Neill wanted to feel vital, and he’d be at his best in the middle of an emergency.

 

“There was an explosion near the South pier,” O’Neill said before John could ask. “The scientists who were on the exploratory team are still among the missing. Rescue teams are being coordinated by Mitchell. And before you ask, your team can go get checked out in the infirmary, and then you can join the rescue efforts.”

 

O’Neill was using his command voice, and John knew better than to argue with a general. At least, he knew better than to argue with O’Neill under the circumstances. Post-mission medicals were a part of the job, especially when anyone had consumed food or drink off-world. That was the rule, and there was a good reason for it.

 

“Come on,” John said quietly. “We can get a full update from Beckett.”

 

He led the way to the infirmary, because that’s what the leader of a team did—he, or she, led by example. John might not have let on to it, but he’d read the mission reports from SG-1, and he’d learned quite a bit from O’Neill just from that.

 

Beckett was distracted enough that he rushed through their post-mission medicals, taking blood samples and herding them out after he’d gotten their vital statistics. “Everything looks fine,” Carson said. “If you start experiencing any sort of symptoms, or problems, I want to know immediately.”

 

“You got it, Doc,” John promised. “You got the sample, right?”

 

“I have it,” Carson replied, sounding distracted. “Go. I’m expecting more patients.”

 

John nodded. “Thanks.”

 

“Go,” Carson repeated. “I’ll pull you off duty if there’s anything untoward.”

 

John figured that an explosion on the city meant that something was already “untoward,” but he didn’t say as much. Instead, they headed for the South pier, and John found Mitchell coordinating the search efforts. He reminded himself that Mitchell was perfectly capable of this sort of thing, and forcing himself in on the situation wouldn’t do any good. In fact, John was pretty sure he’d hate being in Mitchell’s position, coordinating efforts while everybody else searched for survivors or bodies.

 

In truth, John would much rather be under Mitchell’s command, searching.

 

“We’re here to help,” John said simply. “Just tell us where we’ll do the most good.”

 

Mitchell shot him a look that was half suspicion, half-gratitude, and then his face relaxed into a smile when he realized that John was serious. “I think they could use your help digging through the rubble,” Mitchell replied. “You okay with that?”

 

John knew what Mitchell was asking. “”We’ll go wherever you send us.”

 

He led the rest of his team down the hall, towards the lights and noise that marked the location of the rescue crew. From long experience, John easily spotted the most exhausted workers—Barnes was right in the forefront, his young face streaked with soot, working shoulder to shoulder with three other young Marines.

 

“Hey, take a break,” John said, shouldering Barnes out of the way. “Get something to eat, something to drink, and catch a quick nap.”

 

For once, Barnes appeared too tired to protest. “Yes, sir,” he said, his shoulders slumping.

 

“You, too,” John insisted, pointing at Suh, Carpenter and Lee. “Take four hours, then check in with Colonel Mitchell.”

 

They didn’t argue either, trudging down the hallway, leaving John’s team to take their places. John glanced at Rodney. “If you’ve got another way to help—”

 

Rodney shook his head. “No, not yet. I’ll let you know if I come up with something.”

 

It didn’t take long for John to recognize that there wasn’t a better or a smarter way to work. The explosion had disrupted the frequency the life signs detectors used, and it hadn’t cleared up, which meant they had no idea whether any of the missing scientists were still alive. Rodney could have explained exactly what had happened, and what the interference was—or at least he’d have made a good attempt—but they were all too busy sifting through rubble.

 

There were times that they all had to take a step back and let the engineers, led by an exhausted-looking Zelenka, move some of the heavier beams and chunks of wall. During those breaks, John checked in with the other workers, sending away anyone who looked too tired to do much good, making sure no one had any injuries.

 

The explosion had taken out enough of the South pier to collapse half a dozen hallways, and during one of the breaks, he ran into Elizabeth, whose hands were marred by cuts and scrapes. “Hey,” he said wearily. “We got the trade deal ironed out, no problem.”

 

She leaned against the wall wearily. “Well, that’s a bit of good news in the middle of this mess.”

 

John sank down to the floor, and she joined him soon after. He’d left his team in another hallway, waiting on one of their few structural engineers to give the go-ahead to continue excavations. “Do you know anything more about what happened?”

 

“Daniel went back to the map he found. Apparently, one of the labs on the exploration list was dedicated to weapons research,” Elizabeth replied with a sigh. “I know Rodney and Zelenka warned them not to activate anything, but you know the scientists.”

 

John grimaced. “All too well. O’Neill and Mitchell seem to be doing a good job coordinating things.”

 

Elizabeth smiled thinly. “I’m just glad not to be stuck behind a desk right now,” she confessed. “Even if all I want is a shower and a hot meal.”

 

John heard a shout from down the corridor, and he rose to his feet, offering Elizabeth a hand up. “You and me both,” he agreed. “See you later?”

 

She nodded. “Call me on the radio. We’ll figure out whether we need to meet right away, or whether we can wait until tomorrow.”

 

They found the first body an hour later, and John’s team was the one to pull out Dr. Richards. He saw Rodney’s stricken expression as they pulled the battered body out from under the detritus.

 

“Hey, you okay?” John asked.

 

Rodney nodded tightly. “I just want to find the rest of Richards’ team.”

 

John put a hand on Rodney’s shoulder. “You got it, buddy.”

 

No one was ever replaceable, but these days good people were even harder to come by than they had been in the past.

 

In spite of his exhaustion, John pushed forward, searching for the other missing scientists. He wondered which of them had activated the bomb, not that it mattered. Placing blame wouldn’t help, although if they knew what had happened, they could at least hold it up as a cautionary tale.

 

It was late by the time they found the rest of the missing scientists—or pieces of the missing scientists. There was enough left of each of them to be certain there were no survivors, and John called off the search at that point. Everyone was exhausted and heartsick, and all he wanted was a shower and a few hours of sleep.

 

One look at Rodney’s face put paid to John’s intentions to head back to his room alone. Rodney looked lost, maybe even a little angry, his expression a mirror of the one he’d worn after Gaul and Abrams had died.

 

John snagged Rodney’s elbow. “Stay close.”

 

“What? Why?” Rodney asked, his voice a little lost.

 

“Just—hang on,” John replied.

 

He checked in with Teyla and Ronon briefly, telling them, “We aren’t meeting until noon tomorrow. Take the morning off.”

 

Teyla threw a quick, worried look at Rodney before she nodded. “Of course, John.”

 

“Thanks,” John replied. “Thanks for everything.”

 

Teyla pulled John in, and he pressed his forehead to hers. Ronon clapped him and Rodney on the shoulders, causing each of them to stagger a bit. Teyla pulled Rodney into a similar embrace.

 

“I just have to call Lorne,” John said. “Your place or mine?”

 

Rodney hesitated. “John, you don’t have to—”

 

“Your place or mine?” he asked doggedly.

 

Rodney’s shoulders slumped, as though he was giving up. “Mine. I’ve got the prescription mattress, remember?”

 

“I remember,” John replied gently. “Your bed is bigger anyway.”

 

“Maybe we should think about moving into some of those larger quarters,” Rodney suggested hesitantly.

 

John tried not to let on to how much that meant coming from Rodney. “Maybe we should,” he agreed. “Let me call Lorne.”

 

Lorne sounded weary when he answered the radio. John knew Lorne had been working in another area of the pier all day, and that he was scheduled to be on call tonight. “You okay?” John asked.

 

“Reeves is going to take any calls that come in,” Lorne replied. “I sent him to take a nap this afternoon, so he’s fresher than we are. If something major comes up, he’s got orders to call me first, and I’ll call you if necessary.”

 

“Thank you, Evan,” John replied sincerely.

 

There was a moment’s pause. “Not a problem, sir. Enjoy your evening. What’s left of it, anyway.”

 

“You, too,” John replied.

 

John steered Rodney down the hallway as they exited the lift. “You okay?” he asked in a low voice as they entered Rodney’s quarters.

 

“I just keep wondering what I did wrong,” Rodney admitted, still looking a little lost. “They’re supposed to be the best and the brightest, right? I’ve told them not to activate anything. I tried not to include gene carriers on exploratory teams. What the hell else am I supposed to do, John?”

 

John hated how Rodney’s voice broke on the last words, and he hauled Rodney in, holding him tightly. “I know that, whatever happened, whatever bad decision somebody made, it wasn’t because you didn’t warn them,” John said in Rodney’s ear. “I’ve heard your speech to new minions. You’re scary as hell, McKay.”

 

Rodney laughed, even as he wrapped his arms more tightly around John. “I tried.”

 

“You did good,” John insisted. “We’ll figure it out. We’ll find out what they did, and we’ll put the fear of McKay in them, and nothing like this will happen again.”

 

“That’s just wishful thinking,” Rodney mumbled against his shoulder.

 

“Probably,” John agreed. “You want to take a bath?”

 

Rodney shook his head. “Not when I’m this dirty. I’d prefer a shower.”

 

“You want company?”

 

“Definitely.”

 

If John hadn’t been so fucking tired, the shower would have been incredibly arousing—all that bare, slick skin, Rodney’s broad shoulders and strong arms, and a cock that slowly began to take interest in the proceedings. When John dropped to his knees, Rodney went from half-mast to full interest in about two seconds.

 

Rodney leaned back against the shower wall. “ _John_.”

 

“Yeah, that’s my name,” John replied before he sucked Rodney down.

 

Rodney wasn’t often speechless, so John counted it a job well done when Rodney was reduced to incoherent mutterings above him. It had been a long time since he’d sucked dick, but he hadn’t lost his skill. Rodney came quickly, his hips stuttering a bit, and John gripped Rodney’s hips tightly as he clambered to his feet.

 

John rinsed his mouth out in the spray from the shower, and then Rodney pulled him in for a kiss, a large, warm hand wrapping around John’s cock.

 

Rodney jacked him off in the shower with John thrusting lazily against Rodney’s fist. His exhaustion had his orgasm coming later than it might have otherwise, but he still managed to thrust into Rodney’s fist, and when he came, it was with a groan of completion.

 

John had to admit that shower sex was a lot easier to clean up than sex anywhere else, and he hustled Rodney back to his bed without any trouble. “You should sleep,” John said.

 

“Are you going to sleep?” Rodney countered.

 

“Only with you,” John replied.

 

Rodney managed a tired smile. “Good.”

 

On another night, they might have managed round two, but they were both too tired to do anything more than fall into bed.

 

So, they fell together, and as far as John was concerned, that was good enough.


	11. Farewells

_“No one wanted Cam to take that mission. No one wanted to say it out loud, but a lot of us were thinking that they might not come back. O’Neill barely escaped, and we had been held by the Goa’uld for two weeks. We talked about going back as a team, but it was judged to be too risky. We were a family, and it’s hard to see someone who’s a member of your family leave, especially if you don’t know if they’re ever coming back.”_

 

~Interview with Vala Mal Doran

 

Cam scratched his face, annoyed at the itching. He’d never grown a beard before, mostly because the itching drove him crazy, and he’d never had reason or opportunity in the past. Now, he figured the fact he’d never had a beard made growing one a viable disguise, especially since he hadn’t had a haircut in a while.

 

But first he had to get through this damn itching phase, and it might drive him nuts before he managed it.

 

There was no sense in packing yet, mostly because he didn’t have anything _to_ pack. He had his uniforms from the SGC, and a couple of uniforms that he’d been given on Atlantis, but they would have to steal or buy civvies once they were back on Earth. Jon was set, but Cam hadn’t thought to pack a pair of jeans on their last mission.

 

Besides, he had a couple of days before they were scheduled to leave.

 

The door chime sounded, and he called out, “Come in.”

 

Sam stepped inside, leaning up against the wall. “You know, if I didn’t know you as well as I do, I’d be pretty hurt right now.”

 

Cam winced. “Sam—”

 

“You’ve been avoiding us.”

 

He didn’t see the point in denying it. “I’m sorry,” he said instead of explaining.

 

Sam drifted over to his bed, perching on the edge. “You’re family, Cam. We might not want to let you go, but we understand why you volunteered.”

 

Cam was a little ashamed of his choice to avoid his teammates, especially when faced with Sam’s real distress. “I’d say I was sorry again, but—I’m sorry.”

 

“Don’t worry about it,” Sam said immediately. “I know what it’s like to avoid people who might talk you out of something you really want to do.”

 

“So, you’re going to talk me out of it?” Cam asked.

 

“Could I?” Sam countered quickly.

 

Cam shrugged and sat down next to her. “Probably not.”

 

“There you go, then,” Sam replied. “Why should I try to convince you to do something you don’t want to do?”

 

Cam bumped his shoulder against hers. “You shouldn’t, I guess.”

 

Sam hooked an arm around Cam’s neck. “I don’t have a lot of family, you know, but you’re part of it.”

 

Cam leaned his forehead against the top of Sam’s head. “Thanks,” he said, not arguing with her. If he could have chosen a sister, it would have been Sam, no question about it.

 

“The lottery results come out tomorrow,” she said softly.

 

Cam had been trying not to think about that. If he had to go back to Earth without the certainty that he could offer his family—or part of his family—asylum, he had no idea _what_ he was going to do.

 

Then again, he had no idea how he would choose among his many relatives. Did he take his parents? His brother? His brother’s kids?

 

“My list is too long,” he confessed.

 

“Technically, so is mine,” Sam replied. “But my brother has never been anywhere near the Stargate program. I doubt he’ll be a target.”

 

Cam had no idea how the new regime quantified “threats,” and until he did, he wasn’t inclined to trust that his family was safe. But maybe it would be better to tell himself that they would be okay; if he could convince himself of that, he might be able to leave his family on Earth if that’s what was required.

 

“I hope you’re right,” Cam said finally. “Because if they’re not on that list…”

 

“You heard the plan,” Sam replied. “If it looks like they’re in trouble, exceptions will be made, the same way Teal’c made an exception for Cassie.”

 

Cam shook his head with a sigh. “And I’m just supposed to walk away and leave them?”

 

“I can’t answer that for you,” Sam replied. “No one can. In the end, we all have to be able to look at ourselves in the mirror.”

 

That was just the thing, Cam thought. If he didn’t come up on the lottery, he didn’t think he’d be able to look at himself in the mirror if he saved his family and not someone else’s. And he wasn’t sure if he’d be able to look at himself in the mirror if he _didn’t_ save his family.

 

Maybe he never should have taken this job, but that decision was behind him now.

 

“It’s going to be okay,” Sam promised, as though sensing his internal turmoil. “Maybe you won’t get them out this trip, but there’s always the next.”

 

Cam let out a breath. “Next trip, huh?”

 

“You’re not thinking this is going to be one-way, are you?”

 

“You never know,” Cam dodged.

 

Sam pulled back. “No! You don’t get to do that. If you’re planning on not coming back, I’m going to talk Elizabeth into scrapping the mission. And don’t try to placate me, because I’ll know.”

 

And she would, too, Cam thought. Sam always seemed to know those sorts of things. “I’m coming back,” he insisted, a little surprised by the conviction in his own voice. Until he’d actually said it, he hadn’t believed it.

 

“Okay,” Sam said. “You’re coming back. And if we need to go back, we’ll go back.”

 

Cam liked the sound of that. “It’s a plan.”

 

~~~~~

 

Daniel entered the mess alone; Vala was training with the Athosians, and she enjoyed it so much that Daniel wasn’t incline to interrupt. He had no idea where Cam was, or Sam, or Jack.

 

Not that he wasn’t perfectly happy to eat lunch alone, of course, There were plenty of other people he knew on Atlantis, and he spotted a couple of them as he looked around. And then he spotted Cassie eating lunch with Jon.

 

His brain stuttered to a halt as he considered the implications. They looked to be the same age, but Jack’s clone probably still looked at Cassie as the kid he’d rescued. And hell, how weird would that be, to be mentally well into middle age and yet find that the girls your own _physical_ age were young enough to be your daughter. It was no wonder that Jon had gone off the grid.

 

How could anyone forget forty years of experience overnight? Daniel wasn’t entirely sure the SGC had done right by Jack’s clone.

 

Daniel might not have joined them, but Cassie saw him and waved insistently, and it had been a while since he’d checked up on her. Daniel grabbed his lunch and sat down next to Cassie. “How are you two getting along?”

 

Jon fixed him with a look that was very reminiscent of his counterpart. “Don’t even go there.”

 

Cassie rolled her eyes. “We’re _friends_. We spent a lot of time together, waiting for Jack to recover.”

 

Daniel hadn’t thought of it quite that way. “I guess you did.”

 

“And besides,” Cassie continued. “Jon is the only one who _isn’t_ talking about the lottery results.”

 

“In that case, I’m in the right place,” Daniel replied.

 

The whole city was buzzing over the lottery results, which was better than all the speculation over the explosion on the South pier. Lieutenant Cadman had taken over the investigation, since she had some expertise with explosives, but so far the results had been inconclusive. Then again, Daniel had seen the damage; he didn’t expect them to find anything.

 

Since then, however, they had been gearing up, getting supplies together for Cam and Jon’s trip back to Earth. Sam had been going over Jack’s _tel’tak_ with a fine-toothed comb to make sure Cam and Jon didn’t have the problems they’d had getting to Atlantis.

 

The _tel’tak_ was in better shape than the ship they’d stolen from the arms dealers, though, and Sam seemed confident that it would get Jon and Cam to Earth and back.

 

But that meant that the city was abuzz with talk about the mission, and the lottery. Nearly everybody on the city had a list, and had asked for family to be brought back to Atlantis.

 

Jon, Cassie, and Daniel were in a different boat, and Daniel didn’t want to listen to the speculation as to who might win.

 

Daniel wondered if it really was winning; it would probably depend on how dangerous Earth was at the moment.

 

“It’s weird,” Cassie said. “I mean, I get why it’s all people can talk about, but I get strange looks when I tell them I don’t have anybody back on Earth.”

 

Jon shrugged. “Just ignore them. I’ll bet there’s more than a few who with they were in our shoes.”

 

“Maybe,” Cassie replied dubiously.

 

“Look at it this way,” Daniel said. “You’ve got your family here already. You’re one of the lucky ones.”

 

Cassie smiled and ducked her head. “Yeah, I guess I am.”

 

“How are things going in the infirmary?” Daniel asked.

 

“Carson is really nice,” Cassie said brightly. “And I’m learning a lot, like how to draw blood and give injections, and I’m working through a couple of chemistry and biology textbooks.”

 

“I see your plan to be a doctor is going ahead,” Daniel observed with a smile.

 

Cassie shrugged. “Carson said that all doctors used to be apprenticed, and that’s how they trained. He thinks I can do the same.”

 

“I don’t see why not,” Jon said. “You’re a smart kid.”

 

Cassie rolled her eyes, but she didn’t voice a protest at Jack’s comment.

 

Daniel shot a look at Jon, who wore a familiar smirk, as though he’d been deliberately irritating to tease Cassie.

 

That was Jack all over; Daniel wasn’t sure if that was scary or reassuring.

 

“I should get going,” Cassie said as she finished her meal. “I’m supposed to be learning how to run labs. See you later?”

 

Jon waved at her, and Daniel said, “Maybe at dinner.”

 

Daniel spent the afternoon finishing his translation of the entries on the manufacture of ZPMs, and he sent what he had off to McKay and Sam. He had no idea whether they had the resources to make the attempt, and he knew that decision was best left to the scientists.

 

Sam showed up in his office about fifteen minutes later. “You translated it?”

 

“It was slower going than I’d hoped,” Daniel admitted. “A lot of the scientific terms were difficult to translate, but I think I’ve got it right. Do you think you can duplicate their efforts?”

 

“Maybe,” Sam replied. “I’m going to talk with Zelenka and McKay now.” She paused. “We’re supposed to have the meeting in a couple of hours to discuss the results. Will you be there?”

 

Daniel nodded. “You?”

 

She shrugged. “We may have an update on the ZPM by then.”

 

Daniel was grateful that Corrigan was as clever with computers as he was with languages, and between the two of them, they were indexing the information in a way that made a lot more sense—at least to the people from Earth.

 

He noticed that Corrigan was shifting on his chair as the time for the meeting drew near. “Did you leave someone back on Earth?” Daniel asked.

 

Corrigan shook his head. “Not really. I didn’t put my name in.”

 

“But you seem nervous, Kevin.”

 

He shifted again. “I’ve been seeing Miko recently—Dr. Kusanagi.”

 

It took Daniel a moment to place the name, but he nodded. “And she has people on Earth.”

 

“Her parents,” Corrigan confirmed. “I’m worried on her behalf.”

 

“I can understand that,” Daniel replied. “The results will be broadcast immediately, so you won’t have long to wait.”

 

“Thank you,” Corrigan murmured. “You’d better get going if you don’t want to be late.”

 

Daniel was, indeed, a few minutes late to the meeting, and he poured himself a cup of the not-coffee they’d traded for with the Donak before taking a seat next to Jack.

 

“We wanted to do this fairly,” Elizabeth began. “So, we’re doing it the old fashioned way.” She set a large bowl filled with slips of paper on the table. “Daniel, your name isn’t in here. I’d like you to do the honors.”

 

Daniel blinked, a little surprised at the request, although he supposed it only made sense since he didn’t have a stake. As far as he knew, of the members of SG-1, only Cam had put his name in.

 

“Sure,” Daniel said, rising to his feet, feeling a little trepidation. He didn’t like holding others’ lives in his hands.

 

He glanced around the table. Sheppard’s expression was blank, as was Jack’s, but everyone else wore expressions full of varying degrees of anxiety. Plunging his hand into the bowl, he pulled out the first slip of paper and unfolded it, feeling a bit of relief when he saw the name. “Miko Kusanagi,” he read.

 

No one made a sound, and Daniel reached in for a second slip of paper. “Rose Dawson,” he read.

 

Elizabeth made a small sound, and Daniel thought she seemed pleased. No wonder, since Corporal Dawson would be pleased to have family around when she had the baby.

 

Daniel took a deep breath and pulled out the third slip, hoping for Mitchell’s sake that it was his name, but instead he read, “Rodney McKay.”

 

“Me?” McKay squeaked out. “I—really?”

 

Daniel wondered what kind of family McKay had back on Earth to appear both anxious and elated in equal measure. Sheppard squeezed McKay’s shoulder. “Breathe, Rodney,” he ordered, sounding amused. “I guess this means we’ll finally get to meet your sister.”

 

Mitchell was staring down at the table, his face pale, and the muscle in his jaw ticking wildly, and Daniel felt a stab of sympathy. Sam, who was sitting next to Mitchell, put a hand on his arm.

 

Daniel noticed that no one else at the table could quite look at Mitchell.

 

McKay cleared his throat. “We have some news about the ZPM. I think we may be able to build one.”

 

~~~~~

 

As far as Sam was concerned, they’d needed a break, and the idea of being able to produce their own ZPMs would solve a lot of problems. The plans that Daniel had translated were just what they needed to bridge that final gap.

 

“You see?” Zelenka was saying, calling up the map of Atlantis that Daniel had found and mostly translated. “Here. This is where we will find the lab, and perhaps the materials we need.”

 

“If the Ancients didn’t take it all with them,” McKay commented sourly, although his eyes were sparkling with excitement. “But it’s worth checking into. In this case, I think it should be me.”

 

Sam frowned. “Why you?”

 

“Because I’m the only person I trust not to touch something that shouldn’t be touched,” Rodney replied.

 

Sam was beginning to be able to read McKay, and she knew that he felt the loss of those scientists more than he’d let on. “Which is why it should probably be me or Zelenka,” Sam pointed out. “Neither of us have the gene, so we’re a lot less likely to set something off.”

 

“You’ll need someone with the gene to get you inside most likely,” McKay replied, but he didn’t disagree with her reasoning.

 

Sam hesitated, then suggested, “Why don’t I ask Jack? He has the gene.” She didn’t say that Jack would probably be grateful to get out of the office and get out from behind a desk.

 

McKay looked thoughtful. “I suppose I can trust you to keep him from touching something he shouldn’t.”

 

“He wouldn’t put a teammate in danger,” Sam insisted. Jack would risk his own life, but not one of theirs, not unless he had a good reason.

 

McKay nodded. “All right. I’ll let you handle it, but I think the sooner we know, the better off we’ll be.”

 

“This section of the city was damaged by the storm,” Zelenka said. “I will send Esposito with you to check the integrity of that area.”

 

“We’ll take Daniel, too,” Sam replied. “If there’s something in Ancient, he’ll be able to read it better than anyone else.”

 

McKay nodded. “Good, good. What are you waiting for?”

 

Sam checked the time. “I’ll set it up tonight, and we’ll head out tomorrow morning.”

 

She found Jack in Elizabeth’s office with Sheppard. They were going over the mission roster and rotation, and she knocked. “Sorry to interrupt,” she began.

 

Elizabeth waved her inside. “It’s fine. I’m assuming you have news about the chances of building our own ZPMs.”

 

“We think we know the location of the lab the Ancients used to build them,” Sam confirmed. “After what happened with the South pier, McKay doesn’t want to send an inexperienced team.” She looked at Jack. “Are you up for it?”

 

Jack straightened in his chair. “Seriously?”

 

“Why not?” she countered. “We need someone with the gene just in case, but we also need someone who isn’t going to get us killed.” Sam grinned, adding, “With age comes wisdom, right?”

 

Jack’s eyes narrowed. “Are you giving me a hard time about my age, Colonel?”

 

“I wouldn’t do that, sir,” she replied innocently, not missing Sheppard’s smirk, or the smile Elizabeth hid behind her hand.

 

Jack shrugged. “I’m all yours, Carter.”

 

“Is Cam still leaving the day after tomorrow?” Sam asked.

 

Elizabeth nodded. “That’s the plan. I’ve asked Carson to review the medical supplies, and I’m asking everyone to go over their inventory, just in case Cam and Jon have the chance to go shopping.”

 

Elizabeth’s tone was light, but Sam could hear the worry in her voice.

 

“Mitchell is going to be fine,” Jack insisted. “He’s a smart guy, and if there’s anyone who can fly under the radar, it’s my clone.”

 

“I wouldn’t send them if I didn’t think they would come back,” Elizabeth said, but to Sam it seemed almost as though she was trying to convince herself. “If you want to put off the exploration for another day or two, I’d understand.”

 

“You might, but McKay wouldn’t,” Sam replied wryly. “And no, I’m as anxious to see this lab as McKay is to know what’s in it.”

 

“Take Vala, too,” Sheppard suggested. “She’s got a lot of energy, and she’s not on the roster for tomorrow. Plus, she doesn’t have the gene, and she knows how to keep her hands to herself.”

 

Sam smiled. It had been too long since she’d been on a mission with Vala, and she’d missed Vala these last few weeks. “I can do that.”

 

“Good,” Sheppard said. “Keep us in the loop, Colonel Carter.”

 

She nodded. “Of course.”

 

It felt a little strange to walk out, and to not be a part of the decision-making process; it was even stranger not to see Cam there, making those decisions.

 

Sam wondered if she’d ever see Cam in that position again. Even if he didn’t return to Atlantis, Sam didn’t think she could see him sitting behind a desk. Jack was different; Jack had taken a desk job before things had gone to hell. He might be in more pain now, or in pain all the time even if he hadn’t been before, but Jack had been prepared to sit behind a desk.

 

Cam still had a lot of good years left in him, and if he succeeded in this mission, she wouldn’t be surprised if he kept volunteering for things like this. And that worried her.

 

Sam wandered by the infirmary, poking her head in to check on Cassie. Cassie was in the middle of a lesson from Beckett on suturing, and Sam took a moment just to watch them. Beckett was a patient, if exacting, teacher, and Cassie’s forehead was furrowed in concentration as she practiced on a small pillow.

 

Sam decided not to interrupt, and she decided that she really wanted to see Vala. Tapping her radio, she called, “Vala?”

 

“Yes, Sam?” Vala replied on the private channel, and her voice held an undercurrent of amusement.

 

Sam grinned. “I’m bored.”

 

“We’ll have to fix that, won’t we?” Vala replied, chuckling. “How long has it been since you had a good workout?”

 

Sam made a face. “Too long. What do you have in mind?”

 

“Teyla and I were going to spar,” Vala replied. “Why don’t you join us?”

 

Sam wasn’t sure she wanted to hang out with anyone other than Vala, but she liked what she’d seen of Teyla, and she’d heard stories about Teyla’s prowess with the _bantos_. Sam had trained with Teal’c on occasion, and she thought it might be just as instructive to learn from Teyla.

 

“I’d like that,” she said. “When should I meet you?”

 

“I’m on the way now,” Vala replied.

 

“I’ll see you there,” Sam promised.

 

Teyla was already present when Sam arrived, but Vala wasn’t there yet. Teyla was wearing a skirt split high on both sides, and a tank top of Athosian make. She was barefoot and graceful, and Sam felt more intimidated than was probably warranted.

 

“Vala invited me,” Sam explained awkwardly.

 

Teyla smiled. “You are welcome, Colonel Carter.”

 

“It’s Sam,” she said. “Please.”

 

“Sam,” Teyla agreed. “Vala has spoken highly of you.”

 

Sam wasn’t sure how to respond, other than to say, “I’ve heard good things about you, too.” She shifted nervously. “Should I take my boots off?”

 

“It might be easier,” Teyla replied. “But it’s not required.”

 

Sam sat down to unlace her boots, and while she was at it, she removed her socks and uniform shirt as well. Vala showed up as she dropped her shirt on the floor, grinning widely.

 

“I see we’re all present and accounted for,” Vala said cheerfully. She started to remove her boots as well, and she’d left her uniform shirt behind. “I’m glad you could come, Sam.”

 

Vala’s sincerity undid her. “I’m glad I _could_ make it,” Sam replied. “It should be fun.”

 

Sam hadn’t revised that opinion an hour later, even though Teyla was a hard taskmaster. Not that Teyla wasn’t kind—she was—but she didn’t let up, and she pushed Sam to work harder, do better, and Sam appreciated that.

 

When they finished, Sam’s muscles were aching, and her arms and legs were trembling with exhaustion. “Thank you,” she said, inclining her head towards Teyla, as she would have done for Teal’c. “That was great.”

 

“You are welcome to join us any time,” Teyla assured her.

 

Sam thought of the long hours spent in her lab; she’d been focusing on that work and neglecting her physical training recently, and that wasn’t smart. “If we could set up a regular time, that would be good,” Sam said. “I’ve been neglecting my physical training of late.”

 

Teyla smiled. “Rodney also does the same.”

 

Sam grimaced, not really liking the comparison to McKay. “Then I should probably set a better example,” she replied, making a joke out of it. “If we’ve got a regular schedule, I’ll actually be forced to make the time for it.”

 

“I’ll message you with the times,” Teyla replied. “It was a pleasure, Sam.”

 

“Same here,” Sam said, and meant it.

 

She didn’t mind that Vala hooked her arm through hers as they both headed towards their quarters. Thankfully, they were headed for the same tower, and the same floor.

 

“I could tell you enjoyed it,” Vala said cheerfully.

 

Sam smiled. “You knew I would.”

 

“I thought you might,” Vala replied. “But I’m glad you did.”

 

“How are you?” Sam asked, checking in with Vala as she hadn’t done in too long.

 

Vala leaned into her just for a moment. “I’m okay, really. Better every day.”

 

“That’s good to hear,” Sam replied. “Very good to hear.”

 

Vala smiled. “Daniel had been good to me, and for me, an I do know the difference between the two.”

 

“No doubt,” Sam agreed. “And it’s good that you’re happy. That’s all that matters.”

 

“And you?” Vala asked. “Is that general of yours treating you well?”

 

Sam shrugged. “We’re okay. We’ve both changed, and we’re still figuring out how we fit together.”

 

“I know just what you mean,” Vala replied, real feeling in her voice. “I think Daniel is still realizing that he can’t work all hours of the day and night, and then expect me to be waiting for him.”

 

Sam smiled. “You’ve made a place for yourself on Atlantis. I know Sheppard speaks highly of you.”

 

“ _We’re_ going to be going on a mission together soon, aren’t we?” Vala asked. “You’ve barely been off the city since we arrived.”

 

“I think after Cam leaves,” Sam replied. “It’s been hard to go without him.”

 

“Oh, I agree,” Vala said immediately. “Putting the team back together without Cam would have been heartless, and I’ve never been accused of being heartless.”

 

Sam smiled. “No, no one would ever accuse you of that.”

 

“Are you okay with Cam leaving?” Vala asked.

 

“No,” Sam said bluntly, knowing that she could tell the truth to Vala, even if she couldn’t tell anybody else—even Jack. Maybe especially Jack, because he had been the one to suggest the mission in the first place.

 

Vala wrapped an arm around Sam’s waist.  “I’m not okay with it either.”

 

Sam put an arm around Vala’s shoulders. “It’s nice to know that someone is on my side.”

 

“I’m always on your side,” Vala replied loyally. “You just let me know what you need.”

 

Sam appreciated the support. “Thanks. I’ll let you know. The reverse is also true, you know.”

 

Vala gave her one last squeeze. “I know. I’ll talk to you later.”

 

Sam slipped into her quarters, a little surprised to see Jack lying on their bed. “Hey,” she said.

 

“Hey,” he replied, not lifting his head or opening his eyes.

 

“You okay?” she asked, sitting down on the edge of the bed.

 

Jack was quiet for a long moment. “I think I should be asking you that.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“I mean that I’m an old man, and you can probably do better,” Jack replied. “And that even though I know you’re close to Mitchell, I have no problem sending him back to Earth—and that you’re technically going to be in my chain of command again.”

 

“And I still don’t care,” she insisted. “Jack—”

 

“I just needed to hear you say that,” he confessed, cutting her off, his eyes opening. “I don’t much like the idea of this mission, but I think it’s necessary.”

 

“It is,” Sam replied, trying to swallow past the lump in her throat. “Cam wouldn’t have agreed to go otherwise, and I don’t think Jon would have either.”

 

Jack sighed. “Now you’re lying to me, because you know Mitchell would have taken any job that made him feel useful again, even if it meant it was a suicide run. And Jon has been on his own too long to take orders from anybody.”

 

“You speak from experience,” Sam observed.

 

“Maybe,” Jack agreed. “I’m sorry.”

 

“Don’t apologize,” she ordered. “Just—don’t. Cam didn’t have to volunteer. None of us had to come to Atlantis. We made our decisions, for good or bad, and we’ll live with them.”

 

“I wish it was that simple,” Jack replied, but he held an arm out in invitation. “I just hope you can live with my decisions. I’m not always sure I can.”

 

“I can live with your decisions,” Sam replied. “If only because I know you have our best interests at heart.”

 

Jack pulled her close. “I just hope you’re right,” he murmured into Sam’s hair.

 

She didn’t bother arguing with him; she knew how much Jack doubted himself right now. “I’m always right,” she teased, keeping her tone light.

 

“Sure you are,” he replied, but she could hear the smile in his voice, and she knew they were okay.

 

At least for now.

 

~~~~~

 

Jack woke tangled up with Sam, their limbs entwined, and her breath puffing on his collarbone. Even though his bladder was insistent, Jack had no intention of moving. He liked being near Sam—waking up next to Sam—too much to want to cut it short.

 

He pulled back just enough to see Sam’s face, and she was beautiful. Jack wasn’t sure he’d ever get used to having her next to him; he hoped he never did. Getting used to something meant taking it for granted, and he never wanted to take Sam for granted.

 

Jack had taken Sara and Charlie for granted; he’d expected them to always be waiting when he got home. And then Charlie was gone, and Sara had left, and Jack had learned not to take anybody for granted.

 

He had his team, of course, and he’d learned to count on them, but even then, he’d held something back.

 

Now he had Sam, and he knew he couldn’t afford to take her for granted or hold anything back. He’d learned his lesson with Sara, but a lifetime’s habits were hard to leave behind.

 

Sam stirred in his arms, and Jack waited until her eyes fluttered open before pressing a kiss to her forehead. “Hey.”

 

“Hey,” she said, smiling. “What time is it?”

 

“0730,” Jack replied. “So, not too late.”

 

“No, I guess not,” Sam replied, pressing her lips to Jack’s.

 

He thought about protesting, at least until he brushed his teeth, and then he decided that he didn’t care. Jack tangled his fingers in her long hair and rolled so that she sprawled on top of him.

 

His knees weren’t up to him being on top, and he was in too much pain to really make a go of things. But if Sam was on top, Jack could at least manage to maintain an erection for a little while, depending on what the pain medication allowed.

 

Sam didn’t seem to mind, though. She straddled him and rubbed up against him, until his dick was leaking. And then Sam took him inside, moving slowly and carefully, too slow for Jack to come right away.

 

“Sam,” he said quietly, hearing the hoarseness in his own voice. “Come on, Sam.”

 

Sam moved a little faster, leaning down so her breasts brushed against his chest. It was a huge turn-on, and it didn’t take too much longer until he was coming, and Jack just managed to reach down, playing with Sam’s clit until she came, too.

 

Jack pulled her close, running his fingers through her hair. “You okay?”

 

“Thank you,” Sam countered. “That was good.”

 

“I’m sorry,” Jack said. “I know it’s harder, and—”

 

“Don’t,” Sam replied shortly. “I have you here. It’s enough. Don’t doubt that.”

 

Jack took a breath. “Then I won’t.”

 

“Want to save on water?”

 

Jack grinned. “I’m right behind you.”

 

As soon as Sam disappeared into the bathroom, Jack scrubbed his hands over his face, trying to set aside the guilt once again. He knew that Mitchell was leaving today, and he’d have to be there for that, knowing he’d essentially forced Mitchell and his clone into taking this mission.

 

At least he had known that Mitchell and his clone would be likely to volunteer, and he’d felt no compunction about sending his clone at least. Jack would never get used to there being more than one of him, and the sooner he could go back to forgetting his clone existed, the happier he’d be.

 

Even though he fully expected the guilt to linger awhile longer.

 

“Jack?” she called. “Are you coming?”

 

“I’ll be right there,” he replied, raising his voice. “Suck it up, O’Neill,” he muttered to himself.

 

They showered quickly, because they both had places to be, and they exchanged a quick kiss at the door. “Be careful today,” Jack said.

 

“I wouldn’t worry about me,” Sam said. “I’m going over the ship one last time.”

 

“I’m sorry,” Jack blurted out.

 

Sam brushed her lips over his. “It’s going to be okay,” she insisted.

 

“Thanks,” Jack replied, absurdly grateful for the reassurance.

 

He went to Elizabeth’s office because he didn’t have anywhere else to go, and plopped down in the chair across from her desk.

 

She raised her eyebrows. “Let me guess. You’re bored.”

 

“More than a little,” he admitted. “I’d even do inventory.”

 

Elizabeth’s mouth quirked up in a smile. “I think we can find something else for you to do. I just don’t know what it might be at the moment.”

 

“The truth is, a general is pretty useless in this kind of situation,” Jack said quietly. “I’d be more use as a colonel.”

 

Elizabeth raised her eyebrows. “It’s not your rank that’s keeping you out of the field, General,” she said gently.

 

“No, it’s not,” he agreed. “But that doesn’t mean I don’t need something to keep me out of trouble.”

 

“I can see that,” Elizabeth replied. “Not to be rude, but you’ve had ten years of experience going off-world. How would you feel about sharing some of that knowledge?”

 

Jack raised his eyebrows. “You mean teaching classes?”

 

“Why not?” Elizabeth countered. “We haven’t been able to provide much training to those who have recently transferred to Atlantis. Maybe you should do that.”

 

Jack thought about it. “Maybe I should,” he agreed. He’d always enjoyed briefing young pilots, and training them on the most recent technology. Although he didn’t know much about the Pegasus galaxy, he _had_ experienced a lot. There might be useful knowledge that he could pass along.

 

“Good,” Elizabeth said. “And in the meantime, you can help me go over inventory logs. I know it’s boring, but Cam is prepping for the mission back to Earth, and I need to make sure he has an up-to-date list of mission-critical items—assuming he can get them, of course.”

 

“Of course,” Jack agreed immediately, although he wondered if Elizabeth was using his guilt against him. Not that it mattered. He knew that he’d be the one taking Mitchell’s place in the long run, and ensuring Mitchell and his clone had a list of things to bring back to Atlantis, if at all possible, was an important task.

 

Then again, Jack was fairly certain that Elizabeth didn’t care what motivated him—whether it was guilt, or a desire to be useful or something else. She just wanted the job done.

 

And to be fair, Jack would have taken the same position in Elizabeth’s place.

 

“Let’s go over what you’ve got,” Jack said. “And then we’ll see.”

 

~~~~~

 

Vala had always hated saying goodbye, so much so that she normally avoided protracted farewells. She couldn’t get out of it with Cam, however. O’Neill had commandeered one of the rec rooms for the remaining members of SG-1 and anyone else who wanted to join them.

 

She noticed that Cam appeared more animated than she’d seen him since before they’d left Earth. Whatever disappointment he’d felt over not being one of those chosen in the lottery was nowhere to be seen—or at least had been subsumed by his excitement for the moment.

 

Sheppard had dropped by briefly to deliver a jug of _ruus_ wine and a large bottle of something that Zelenka had distilled, although he hadn’t stayed long. Dr. Weir had remained, and Vala wondered how close Weir and Cam had become, because Weir seemed to be touching Cam a lot.

 

But then they might just be friends.

 

Vala sat down next to Cassie, who looked a little uncomfortable, sitting off to the side while Cam held an intense conversation with O’Neill and Sam. “How are you getting along?” Vala asked.

 

Cassie shrugged. “Okay.”

 

Vala raised her eyebrows at the noncommittal tone, but she didn’t press. “Did you try the wine?”

 

Cassie shook her head. “I’m not twenty-one yet.”

 

“What does that have to do with anything?” Vala asked.

 

Cassie grinned. “That’s the drinking age.”

 

“On _Earth_ ,” Vala countered.

 

“Actually, just in the U.S. It’s younger just about anywhere else.” Cassie looked thoughtful. “Do you think they’d mind?”

 

“I have no idea,” Vala admitted. “But you look like an adult to me.”

 

“I am an adult,” Cassie replied. “Just—don’t say anything.”

 

Vala handed over her mostly-full glass. “I won’t breathe a word. It’s strong.”

 

“Thanks,” Cassie said. “I guess I’m still getting used to the fact that we’re not on Earth anymore.” She took a breath. “So, where’s Daniel?”

 

“He should be here any minute,” Vala replied. “He probably got caught up in his translating again.”

 

Cassie smiled. “That’s Daniel.”

 

Jon plopped down on the other side of Cassie. “You kids having fun?” he asked.

 

Cassie gave Jon a dirty look, but she said nothing other than, “Sure. Are you excited about leaving?”

 

Jon shrugged, his dark eyes shrewd. “It isn’t going to be a pleasure cruise, that’s for sure, but it will be good to be doing something productive.”

 

Vala decided to leave them to their conversation in favor of locating Daniel, who still hadn’t shown up. Tapping her radio, she called, “Daniel? You do remember that we were supposed to be wishing Cam farewell.”

 

There was a long pause, and Daniel said, “Give me a few minutes. I’m right in the middle of something.”

 

The radio cut out, and Vala sighed. She loved Daniel, but he irritated the hell out of her at times, like right now. They were saying goodbye to one of their own, with the possibility that they wouldn’t see him again, and Daniel was caught up in one of his projects.

 

“Hey, Vala!” Cam said, putting an arm around her shoulders.

 

Vala stiffened slightly, and then relaxed, reminding herself that this was Cam, and it was okay.

 

She didn’t flinch from Daniel’s touch these days, and she was getting better with other men, too. Vala knew how to distinguish friend from foe—but she couldn’t always control her involuntary responses.

 

Cam dropped his arm quickly, but Vala responded by threading her arm through his. “Sorry.”

 

“God, don’t apologize, Vala,” Cam said in a low voice. “Your pace, your space. Always.”

 

She rested her forehead against his shoulder. “Thanks.”

 

“Where’s Jackson?” Cam asked.

 

If Vala didn’t know him as well as she did, she would have missed the hurt in his voice, and on his face. “Tied up in a project,” Vala replied. “He’ll be here soon.”

 

Cam nodded. “Typical Jackson, huh?”

 

“He should be here,” Vala said stoutly. “Are you looking forward to this trip?”

 

Cam hitched a shoulder. “I guess I am.”

 

“Doesn’t it seem strange to go back to a place you fled from?” Vala queried.

 

Cam’s lips twitched up into a smile. “We didn’t exactly _flee_ , you know. We just didn’t go back.”

 

Vala grinned. “That’s a fine distinction.”

 

“It’s one that had to be made,” Cam replied. “You okay, Vala?”

 

She nodded. “I’m okay.”

 

“Well, I’m not going to be around, but you know you can count on Sheppard to kick Jackson’s ass if he doesn’t treat you right,” Cam said. “I’ll have a word with him before I leave.”

 

Vala rolled her eyes. “You don’t have to do that, Cameron.”

 

“Someone has to look out for you,” Cam replied. “And okay, Sam could kick his ass, too, but I figure between the two of them, they’ll keep Daniel in line.”

 

“You don’t think I can keep him in line?” Vala countered.

 

Cam grinned. “I’m certain you can, but it never hurts to have backup.”

 

She smiled at that. “No, it never does. Thank you.”

 

“Don’t mention it,” Cam replied. “Now, can I get you a drink?”

 

“I’d love one,” Vala replied. “Surprise me.”

 

“You’ve got it,” Cam promised.

 

Daniel entered just as Cam was handing Vala her drink, and he offered Cam a sheepish grin. “Sorry I’m late. There was something I had to finish.”

 

Vala caught the underlying tension in his voice, and she frowned, realizing that this wasn’t just another project, or another example of Daniel being distracted with work. Before she could ask, though, Daniel clapped Cam on the shoulder. “So, where does a guy go to get a drink?”

 

Vala waited until later, when Daniel wasn’t in the middle of a conversation, to pull him aside.

 

“I’m sorry I was late,” he said immediately.

 

Vala frowned. “I wasn’t going to say anything about _that_ ,” she replied. “I just wanted to know what was keeping you.”

 

Daniel glanced around. “Later, I promise. I don’t want to talk about it now.”

 

Normally, Daniel wouldn’t shut up when he’d made an important discovery, or had an opinion, and his reticence alarmed Vala.

 

When the party finally broke up, it was nearly midnight, and Vala waited until they were back in her quarters before she pressed for answers. “What is it?” she asked. “What did you find?”

 

“The Ancients’ research on Wraith biology,” Daniel replied soberly. “They’d done more than we thought. You know that Carson is working on a means to end the Wraith threat, right?”

 

Vala shrugged. “I assumed he was.”

 

“They’d been working on a way to turn the Wraith human,” Daniel said, sounding distracted and upset. “Elizabeth recommended that Carson refocus his attention on a poison.”

 

Vala didn’t see the problem. “You planned to do the same to the Goa’uld, didn’t you?”

 

Daniel ran a hand through his hair. “Yeah, but—”

 

“You didn’t have a problem killing the Goa’uld,” Vala continued inexorably.

 

“No, of course not,” Daniel replied. “They wanted to kill or enslave us.”

 

“And the Wraith want to eat us,” Vala countered. “I’m not seeing the difference. In fact, since the Wraith apparently can’t live without eating us, it’s even more important that we kill them first.”

 

Vala had heard the rumors about Daniel’s wife, and how she’d been taken as a host. He had every reason to hate the Goa’uld, and it would make sense that he would want every one of them dead.

 

“It’s because you haven’t seen the Wraith at work.” Vala said quietly. “You haven’t seen the threat up close and personal.”

 

“Maybe!” Daniel shot back, sounding defensive. “I know they’re a threat, as big as the Goa’uld are. But—we’re talking about the destruction of an entire race.”

 

Vala raised her eyebrows. “No, we’re talking about the survival of Atlantis,” she countered. “When something wants to eat you, you kill it.” She paused, then added, “And if it’s appropriate, you eat _it_.”

 

Daniel grimaced. “That’s one way of looking at it.”

 

“It’s the only way to look at it,” Vala replied. “In any case, you have to tell Dr. Weir what you found. What happens if the Wraith attack us, and we have no means to protect ourselves?”

 

“You’re right,” Daniel admitted. “I know you’re right. I’ll talk to her tomorrow, after Cam leaves.”

 

Vala nodded. “Good. Come to bed, Daniel.”

 

Daniel spooned her from behind, wrapping an arm around her waist, and burying his face in her hair.

 

Strangely enough, Vala rarely had nightmares when she and Daniel slept so close together. Maybe it was knowing there was someone else to watch her back, even in sleep. Maybe it was because she knew she was safe with Daniel, and if he was there, it was a silent reminder that she was okay. She didn’t know, and she didn’t really care.

 

That night, though—she woke with her heart beating double time, and a scream lodged in her throat, Daniel’s worried face hovering just next to her.

 

“Vala?” he said softly. “Are you okay?”

 

She took a deep breath, and then another. “Yes, I’m fine. It was just—a bad dream.”

 

Daniel reached out for her, and she flinched away, remembering the insistent hands in her dream, touching her even though she screamed her protests.

 

He withdrew immediately. “Vala?”

 

“Just a minute,” she said, trying to get her breathing under control. “I’ll be okay.”

 

“Take all the time you need,” Daniel replied, keeping his hands to himself. “Just tell me what I can do.”

 

After a moment, when Vala was certain she’d pushed the fear aside, she reached out for him, and Daniel pulled her in close. “I’m sorry,” she said.

 

“You don’t have anything to be sorry for,” Daniel countered immediately. “I love you.”

 

He didn’t say it often, so it meant a lot when he _did_ say it, even though she had to have a nightmare to wring the words out of him. “I know,” she replied. “What time is it?”

 

“It’s only six,” Daniel replied. “You could go back to sleep.”

 

Vala shook her head. “No, I can’t sleep now. Cam is leaving in just a few hours, anyway.”

 

“We were up late last night,” Daniel countered. “You should get a little more sleep.”

 

Vala shuddered. “I really can’t sleep.” Maybe after she’d been awake all day, and had left the dream behind her, she’d be able to sleep, but not now.

 

Daniel hesitated. “We could go work out?” he suggested hesitantly.

 

She was grateful that he didn’t suggest sex, because she didn’t think she could handle that right now. But physical exertion sounded like the perfect suggestion. “That would be great,” Vala replied. Maybe, after they had run or sparred or done yoga or _something_ , Vala could deal with being touched again.

 

“Okay,” Daniel said, sounding relieved that he’d made the right call. “Let’s go work out, then. Your call what we do.”

 

Vala took another deep breath. “Let’s start at the gym, and then go from there.”

 

She was making progress, she thought, but some days were still hard. Some days were harder than others.

 

But at least she had Daniel. She reached out and gripped his hand. “Thanks.”

 

“No need to thank me,” Daniel replied. “Come on, let’s go work out.”

 

Vala smiled. “Just another day, right?”

 

No matter what happened, it was always just another day, as far as Vala could tell. They just had to keep living. That was all that mattered.


	12. Epilogue

_“The year after we declared independence was a hard one. We saw a lot of losses, and we were pretty hard-hit. And before you ask, it was difficult to say goodbye to Colonel Mitchell. He was a great help, and we had no idea what the situation was back on Earth. We didn’t want to lose him, but there didn’t seem to be a choice. In the end, we had to do without him, just like we had to do without a lot of people. But the next year—well, the next year we had a huge win, and we lost more than we ever thought we would.”_

 

~Interview with Elizabeth Weir

 

Elizabeth crossed her arms tightly across her chest as she watched Cam say his goodbyes. He shook O’Neill’s hand, and hugged Sam Carter tightly with one arm. He shared a manly one-armed embrace with Daniel, and pulled Vala into a tight embrace, whispering something into her ear that made her laugh, her smile relieving the somberness of her expression.

 

When Cam had finished saying goodbye to SG-1, he approached her. “Hey,” he said. “Sorry to leave you in the lurch.”

 

“Just come back,” Elizabeth replied. “We can’t afford to lose any more good people.”

 

Cam hugged her with his good arm, and Elizabeth took a deep breath, smelling soap and sweat. He smelled good, and Elizabeth knew it had been far too long since she’d had a man in her life. “I’ll be back,” he promised. “Just keep some of that _ruus_ wine for me.”

 

“I will,” Elizabeth promised.

 

She glanced up to see Jon shaking hands awkwardly with SG-1, and she wondered what was going to happen if O’Neill’s clone came back to Atlantis.

 

It didn’t matter, she decided. They’d cross that bridge when the came to it.

 

She stayed until the _tel’tak_ took off, and the crowd had dispersed, and then turned from the pier with a sigh of regret. “Elizabeth,” Daniel called, getting her attention. “We need to talk.”

 

She nodded. “Of course.”

 

“I think you should call Dr. Beckett, too,” Daniel added.

 

Elizabeth blinked, searching her memory for a project that Daniel might have been working on that called for such a result. “I’ll call him,” she promised. “Let’s meet in my office in fifteen minutes.”

 

Daniel showed up early, although that didn’t surprise Elizabeth. She made small talk, asking after Vala, noting Daniel’s hesitation as he answered. She’d read between the lines on SG-1’s bare bones report, but she’d hoped that Daniel would be a little more forthcoming one-on-one, but she understood that the bond between team members didn’t allow for much outside interference.

 

When Carson joined them, Daniel cleared his throat. “I found a couple of entries on Wraith biology yesterday evening,” he began. “I thought you should know. I sent both of you my translation.”

 

Carson had come to the meeting empty-handed, so Elizabeth pulled up the file and allowed Carson to look over her shoulder as they read Daniel’s translation. A lot of it was technical and scientific, language that Elizabeth had a hard time parsing. Carson, on the other hand, didn’t seem to have that problem, and she heard his quick intake of breath.

 

“What is it?” Elizabeth asked.

 

Carson shook his head. “This information will speed our ability to create a poison that will affect only the Wraith. It also suggests that the retrovirus will be temporary at best.”

 

Elizabeth frowned. “What does that mean, Carson?”

 

“It means that we’d be better off coming up with a poison that affects Wraith and not humans,” Carson replied. “Rather than something that turns Wraith human.”

 

Elizabeth hated the idea of using poison against an entire group of—well, “people” didn’t quite fit, but there wasn’t another label that applied. “I want you to prepare this as a last resort,” she finally said. “If we do this, it will be because we’ve been attacked, and we have no other choice.”

 

Carson nodded. “All right. You know that we’ll had a hard time disseminating this, even if I come up with a viable solution.”

 

“We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it,” Elizabeth promised. “Just work on it, Carson.”

 

Carson nodded. “Thank you, Dr. Jackson.”

 

Daniel didn’t appear to be much happier than Carson was. “Don’t mention it.”

 

“Get out of here,” Elizabeth said. “Carson, let me know when you have a solution.”

 

When they’d gone, she wandered over to the window in her office that overlooked the gate room, and she wondered at the vagaries of life, and what she could expect. She hated the idea of biological warfare; it was something that was abhorrent to her. And yet, the idea of having a weapon of last resort against the Wraith was comforting.

 

They had food now, she thought. Atlantis had many of the things it needed to survive, and they were all working actively to strengthen the bonds they had with other planets. Now, it was just a matter of dealing with the threat that Kolya presented, and finding a way to fend off the Wraith.

 

And maybe—just maybe—they would find a way to retake Earth.


End file.
